I had to sit on my boyfriend's friend's lap? Please help me?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend, his four friends, and I were all going to drive up to this lookout. The only car with 4 wheel drive was my boyfriend's so we went in his but I couldn't fit. All of his friends volunteered to have me sit on their laps and were joking around so my boyfriend picked the friend that he trusted the most. As we were driving I fell asleep (I fall asleep every road trip) in the crook of the friends neck and he was still holding me to him to keep me secure. I guess while I was sleeping his friends were talking about how we looked adorable snuggled up and my boyfriend was pissed by the time I woke up. He is still being a buzzkill. How can I make him stop being pissy?

Updates

+1 y

To clear things up, my boyfriend had to drive because the rest of the guys can't drive standard. If they would have drove we would have wrecked.

[Fortres]

This is a good question. Most of all, I feel for the friend, because he was good to you and you probably won't show your appreciation. One or more of the other guys would have likely made sexual jokes about you while you slept, or even held you in a manner other than he should.

Now, your boyfriend cannot be pissed because he did not offer you his lap. Let him know he has no right to be upset at anyone, except maybe the other friends, and that all he can do is learn from his mistakes and handle the situation differently next time if it bothers him. Who does he trust being handled by someone else more, his car or his girl? One must choose.

If you want to alleviate the situation, you simply have to show you have romantic and/or sexual feelings for one person only, and that's all there is to it. Some soft words spoken into the crook of the neck should do it.

[HandsomeRaj]

1. FIRST your bf's fault that he chose to put you on some friend's lap
2. SECOND he sure knows that you tend to fall asleep I'm sure
3. In which case he has probably hatched a conspiracy of sorts or is plain dumb
4. Tell him these in presence of his and your friends you'll find support

[Asker]

He didn't want to but he is the only one that can drive standard well.

[HandsomeRaj]

If I were him, I'd have asked a cpl of my friends to take the Metro or a cab - I've done it too alright

[Asker]

We were going up to the mountains. Cabs don't go up there 😂

[HandsomeRaj]

In which case he should have planned it well enough to ensure your comfort. In this case he made his friends comfortable at your expense. He should have brought along a bigger vehicle or left out one person even if it was to be you.

[Asker]

I guess but it was my idea to drive up anyway. Also, he isn't mad that I fell asleep he is just pissy because for 2 hours he had to deal with his friends taunting him.

[HandsomeRaj]

Then leave it be, he'll get over it by himself :)

[Asker]

But he's being a buzzkill. About 3 hours we had got into this spring we had found about a year back and my boyfriend wouldn't play around with us. We always play chicken and I couldn't play because my boyfriend was refusing to.

[HandsomeRaj]

Goes with the territory I must say :) you need to let him sleep it off and then point out the flaws in his reaction :)

[Asker]

But is it honestly that big of a deal? Would you be that hurt if your girlfriend had been in that position (doesn't matter who's fault it is)?

[HandsomeRaj]

At that age yes it will matter while a lot of girls and guys carry it on for a lifetime - this attitude of looking at things :)

But it's ok a lot of people - rather the majority are that way :)

it's also a psychological vice he's stuck in right now. He'll get over it :)

No I won't be hurt etc if she were in that position. However, I'm adept at driving with a large woman straddling me and I can and will make her sit on my lap while I drive :)

[Hopefuldreamer8]

I guess you shouldn't have fallen asleep, however I don't think your boyfriend can really get angry with you about it. He said he had no problem with you sitting on that friends lap. Maybe in the future he should get someone else to drive. I really don't think you have anything to say sorry over. It's not like you were doing it on purpose. It would be understandable if you were purposely snugging him and flirting with him. You just happened to fall asleep.

[Asker]

The others can't drive standard.

[Hopefuldreamer8]

Then that's his own fault. He really has nothing to be mad at you over.

[Fortres]

I don't like people telling you that you aren't allowed to be comfortable or act naturally. Neither you nor the lap offering friend did anything wrong, and it's important that everyone understands that.

[Anonymous]

I can't believe the ignorant comments! This isn't even your fault. Your boyfriend should have let one of them drive and you sit on his lap. He could have picked his girlfriend (who is suppose to be more important) over a friend and left a friend behind so you wouldn't have to sit on anyone's lap. He made the decision now wants to place the blame on you. Tbh, for him acting pissy I would act pissy in return. The knife cuts both ways.

[Asker]

The others can't drive standard.

[Opinion Owner]

One of them should have been left behind. You come first.

[Fortres]

No one needs to be left behind over prude teenage (or whatever age) boys issues with their own masculinity

[Hollywood-Glam]

You should have sat on your boyfriend's lap instead and one of his friend should have drove. It would have been smart if you offered to sit on your boyfriend's on first place.
Anyway, what's done is done. You can't change what happened. So, explain to your boyfriend that nothing happened between you two, and that you're sorry he felt that way.

[Asker]

The others can't drive standard.

[Hollywood-Glam]

Okay, then tell him that since it was his idea, he has no reason to be mad at you.

[Asker]

He isn't mad at me he is just pretty much throwing a tantrum because he had to hear his friends make fun of him for 2 hours.

[JohnScofield787]

You do not get comfy in another guy's lap. Note that for the future... :-)

As for now, all you can do is say sorry.

[singlebee]

From now on don't ever get comfy in another guys lap...

And your boyfriend is douchbag making you sit on another guys lap... LOL I would make the guy sit on another guy but not my girlfriend... hhaha.
Well he will get over it...

[Asker]

These guys are all over 6 foot and decently big so they weren't going to fit on top of each other 😂 The best choice was to put the 5'1, petite midget on someone's lap.

[ImaSloth]

He's just being a fucking idiot, if he gets bent out of shape because you fell asleep then he must be very insecure, what car were you guys in? Because most 4X4's have plenty of seating now a days, maybe he should invest in a new vehicle..

[Asker]

A Wrangler.

[ImaSloth]

Well shit that explains it :P

[Asker]

Exactly 😂

[LousyLoudMusic]

Put yourself in his shoes, it is kinda okey to sit knda stiff in eacother hands. but if he started holding around her and make her cuddle up to him, that will piss most people off. Just talk to him, an undersatnd where he is coming from.

[reptocarl]

I don't know. He could've let someone else drive his vehicle so he could've held you

[Asker]

The other one's can't drive standard worth a crap.

[reptocarl]

He's just going to have to get over it. He's the one that overloaded his car

[MJas16]

Think about it. If the tables were reversed, I would get mad too but you can't hekp it if you fell asleep. I get why he got mad. Why couldn't you sit in the passenger seat?

[Pyrofox]

Just i guess use to having you so close to him or he was uncomfortable the whole drive. I wouldn't worry to much about it.

[chrisbigman]

Maybe your boyfriend should have told one of his friends to sit on his friend's lap. Just give him time to bitch about how stupid he was and is being.

[Asker]

I am 5'1 and pretty petite so they figured I wouldn't crush anyone. All the guys are over 6' and big. Would you really ask for the friends to sit on one another? What would you have done in this situation.

[chrisbigman]

I woulda told the friend to have some respect and shut up. If he wouldn't, then I would've stopped the truck and had the guy walk. Any friends of mine would respect me and my girlfriend.

[Asker]

The one holding me wasn't making comments and was completely respectful. The other three idiots were making jokes and taking pictures. But you do understand why I had to sit on someone's lap? Would you have made your girlfriend sit on one of your friend's laps?

[chrisbigman]

Yes, I suppose I do understand. But what I don't understand is why your boyfriend didn't make the idiotic friends walk if they were making inappropriate comments.

[Asker]

Because my boyfriend isn't like that. He is kinda a pushover and just took it all without saying anything.

[chrisbigman]

Well, then that's his problem. Since he didn't speak up, he shouldn't have any problem.

[Asker]

He is a little better. We are still at the look out and after we snuggled a bit and we kissed a bit he was feeling a little better. I also pulled the guys to the side and ripped them new assholes.

[Anonymous]

Your boyfriend does not care about you he's trying to run a train on your ass

[jakeofalltrades]

give him some attention, and maybe sex let him know that you only care for him

[Jania14]

Why did you not sit in your boyfriend's lap?

[Jania14]

Just saw the update... comfort him. Guys sometimes need that reassurance.

[KBob93]

You or someone should have gone in the trunk.