Too tired to see me but then goes to the gym?

Question

So, basically, I asked my boyfriend if he wanted to hang out today and he told me no, that he would be too tired and we could tomorrow. He has work, so I understand how it is. However, then I find out he went to the gym immediately after he got off. To me, it's like, you're too tired to see your girlfriend after work, but you'll go to the gym? He's also gone to the gym nearly every day this week, so it isn't like he never gets to go. Any opinions on this? Thoughts? Thanks in advance.

lumos · Accepted Answer

But did he specify that he'd be too tired *after work* or *after hitting the gym*? Because maybe he meant that he'd be too tired after the gym.
Anyway, sometimes people just have their own routines and prioritize them over their relationships or friendships. Which I think is ok, up to a point. His routines are what keeps him in check, it's how he stays healthy and active, probably both mentally and physically. So I don't really blame him. But if it gets to a point where he keeps blowing you off every single day because he has other things to do, then it's clear that he doesn't have the time or the patience for a relationship.
If this just happens once or twice every month or so, try not to think too hard about it. He's still allowed to have his own life, and so do you. Find someone else to hang out with or something else to do when he's busy. But if you start feeling neglected, talk to him about it and explain that you'd like to feel more included in his life.
Maybe consider hitting the gym with him?

milettescheepers · Accepted Answer

mabe he's stressed and needs to hit the gym to relese tension and mabe he has goals that he wants to reach for his body. you're going to loose him if you get this upset about small things. stop your thoughts from drifting in that direction immediately. get a hobby or a friend to spen time with or do workouts at home cause obviously looking good is important to him and i think hel love it if you are nice and toned. strong is the new skinny

BrittBratt2416 · Accepted Answer

If he's too tired to come see you, then he should be too tired to go to the gym. If he's going to the gym after work for most of the week then of course he's always going to be tired to come see you cause he put gym first. Suggest going with him, if he says no then that will let you know it's just an excuse not to come see you.

sinkotopius · Accepted Answer

There can be two layers to this. First of all, gym time is holy. He does it partly because it is routine and partly to be better. The latter is mostly for you
The secound thing is that, even tho he is not physicly tierd (he can go to the gym) but more exhauster in the head. I do not think that he said no to you because he did not want to spend time with you, but more the fact that he just did not feel it today. If you feel this is happening too much, you can talk to him about it. I can imagine he has a perfectly sensible reasson for it. All you need to do is to ask him :)

luv2plzr · Accepted Answer

My opinion will only be just that my opinion what matters is what you can live with and what you can't live with now for my opinion "any guy that wants to do anything else other than spend time with his girl has got his priorities screwed up or in his mind he has a girl he's not interested in spending too much time with" again this is only my opinion on what little you shared about your relationship never make important decisions based on anyone's opinion other than your own it is usual have to deal with the consequences of it good luck

Feresto · Answer

Some people need the routine to be consistent. It is probably more that he can use it as stress relief for his mind to wind down after a mentally exhausting day.
Hitting the gym will be better for his state of mental health than guilting him into spending time with you. Of course I don't know what his motivations are, talk to him.

CheckPlease · Answer

There are 2 tireds for a man physicually and emotionally. Well also mentally but that is another thing that falls into both. He did not have enough emotional energy to meet up with you but he had physical energy to burn. Kind of like when your body is dead but your mind is racing on your pillow. Talk to him about it but don't jump on his throat for it let him explain.

paulbanyan · Answer

The type of energy you need for socializing is way different than the one needed to work out. In fact I find that draining one increases the other. When I blown up everything is funnier and more beautiful, and after a good long talk ripping out a solid set feels so satisfying.

TheDevilInside · Answer

For some people, going to the gym is a routine they've set themselves up to. It's not leisure. It's like going to work or to class. Or, like someone here mentioned, exercising could be some guys' what of winding down and letting steam off. Why not join him? But then do your own workout, don't always shadow him. That would show that you actually support him.

jaafar76 · Answer

I'll be honest with you girl. Meeting a girl you really love at the beginning of the relationship is more tiring to a guy than going to the gym or even studying. He is still trying to show you his best self/hide some aspects of his personality. To make it easier for him help make him at ease. Go to the gym with him sometimes like only 3 days a week or 2. Have fun. If you still csnt feel like you can barf or fart or even sneeze next to him you two are still hiding behind masks.

Anonymous · Answer

For how long have you been dating?
He probably meant he would be too tired after the gym, the issue is
- how long you haven't seen each other and if waiting until tomorrow will make a difference (in my experience, guys respond well to planning things in advance),
- does he go to the "sacred gym " everyday?

PrimevalDead · Answer

It sounds like he just didn't feel like seeing you. It's not the end of the world though. Even in good relationships, people like/need time apart sometimes.

the50wattbulb · Answer

That might be how he relaxes, or he might not be tired physically but instead socially. Going to the gym might be how he releases his stress, the last thing you want is him to snap at you as stress overcomes him.

Imafreespirit · Answer

its just part of his daily routine and perhaps a way to relax after an exhausting day. The gym is a great place to get rid of the stress and have some time for yourself.

NaultD · Answer

For a lot of people they think of going to the gym is like brushing your teeth. You have to be consistent or you just won't ever do it. So its more a choir then fun. So take it as you will.

DevikaButts95 · Answer

Keeping himself healthy and active perhaps. He might consider that a form of work too, Not like he stands to benefit entertainment wise from going to the gym.

Cosytoasty · Answer

Gym is therapeutic sometimes. Women are headaches sometimes.

Phoenix98 · Answer

For guys like us it's kind of just a part of our daily routine like eating breakfast or brushing our teeth, it's how we relax if that makes sense.

fluffyassunicorn · Answer

Maybe he was talking about being too tired because he knew he was going to the gym.

Leimarie · Answer

I would recommend finding someone else who will prioritize seeing you over going to the gym.

bekkesmash · Answer

The gym can be relaxing, a hard workout can help with mental fatigue. And you have to stick to your workout schedule if you want to achieve the body you are after.

pizzainbed · Answer

I think some people touched on this already, but it could indeed be that this is just part of his daily routine, and there's different meanings to being tired.

LoneWolf24 · Answer

Lmao this was me with my ex, but for me going to the gym was like taking a shower, like I had to do it

byusuri · Answer

Sounds like he really wanted/needed to go to the gym. I know when I feel that tired, I force myself to go cause it relieves stress and actually gives me more energy.

jaydtre · Answer

I think he already had plans to go to the gym before you even asked, that's probably why he said he'd be tired. Has he gone to the gym and seen you the same day?

JustCallMeLeon · Answer

Gym is therapy. Us gym freaks dont expect you to understand. I actually feel less mental fatique after the gym. Unless its power squat day.

tytrey96 · Answer

Sounds like he's a gym rat, those guys value the gym over life itself

kurogami · Answer

Well, going to the gym is a good habit, If I can make my routine another day and go to see you, I would have go to you

FxckBoy · Answer

At the gym he works on his health. More important than staying home with his girlfriend and eating and getting fat. Just see him tomorrow.

yoitsmebro · Answer

It means he has his priorities straight. When you're a shredded sick kunt, you can have anything bro.

Anonymous · Answer

gym time is sacred and he must go there. Trust me he would rather be with you than at the gym, but he goes there partly for you I'm guessing

SuccessfulHornDog · Answer

The gym must not be as tiring.

omgjassy · Answer

Sounds like a gym fanatic

momo770 · Answer

Talk about spending time together

Sn0wst0rm · Answer

You still don't realize the importance of gainzzz

Anonymous · Answer

Probably wanted alone time, hun

Anonymous · Answer

because gym is important for him

khiking · Answer

No days off

hungry_charizard · Answer

What an ass

Matt-G · Answer

A good habit x

KIIROKI · Answer

gym is life

Sabretooth · Answer

Nice lie...

Too tired to see me but then goes to the gym?

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Too tired to see me but then goes to the gym?

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