Married man has a crush on me?

[Anonymous]

A married colleague has a crush on me and has done for the most of this year. It’s really cute in a way and quite flattering how I’ll catch him looking at me, and how he’ll try and show off in front of me and sometimes get shy.

Nothing is ever going to happen here but it did get me wondering, why does he torture himself? He always tries to make conversation, sometimes turns up places where he knows ok going to be, looks at me ALL the time.

Why would a guy torture himself in trying to get closer to a woman he can never have or make a move on?

[AlphaMale1]

I wondered this same thing and researched it. What I found is humans, like everything on this planet, resonate at a frequency. People we feel immediately attracted to are close to the same frequency we are at. Those we feel uncomfortable around or simply do not like them and don't know why is because the frequency the two of us are at are not even close.

There is more to this. However, this is how I understand it in a nutshell and am convinced this is true.

[guy532]

It's not like once people get married they stop being attracted to beautiful people. He's extremely attracted to you and he can't help it. I bet if he had a choice he'd choose to not be attracted to you anymore but no one can do that so he's just stuck.

[Asker]

Yea and I get that. I’ve been in similar situation myself in the past. But surely turning up where he knows I’m going to be and spending time with me just makes it harder?

[guy532]

Yes and no. You're his eye candy, everyone enjoys some eye candy every now and then. He probably looks forward to checking you out throughout the day lol. Just think back in high school/uni days when you'll be excited for a certain class because that hot person is also in that class and you get to stare at them haha

[Asker]

Yea that’s very true!

[Asker]

But that was also torture lol! Someone you couldn’t have

[JulyBug]

Just because he has a crush on you doesn’t mean he intends to sleep with you. Many men have crushes on woman but won’t pursue it further; they enjoy what they have at home but their crush gives them a little spark to take home if that makes sense.

[Anonymous]

Lol, "torture himself" don't flatter yourself, he might not want you that bad. He's prob gonna make a move soon, and step out on his wife... you should stay away unless you wanna be in the middle of that.

[Alan180188]

once a cheater, always a cheater !
he's not a player since you say he's shy, yet he have some self secure issues and is not happy at home, so he's searching for an answer outside of it...

[Asker]

Yea he definitely doesn’t seem happy at home. He doesn’t really talk to me about stuff like that but I hear things from other people in work and he doesn’t seem to enjoy being at home and they don’t seem to spend any time together. But it’s just weird, I always see him looking at me etc, although he’s never made a move

[Alan180188]

he won't make a move , his subconscious is pushing him away while his broken heart is pushing him to do the opposite, he's confused and sad... don't blame him but be gentle with him and stay away from him, be cold but polite...

[Asker]

How bizarre, so he just likes to look basically

[Alan180188]

unless you don't open the door for him, yes he'll just do that !

[Asker]

It’s so weird because he always makes effort to be around me when he sees me and I can tell from how he looks at me that he likes me. I don’t know of anyone that has looked at me how he has before. But I just keep a friendly distance

[Asker]

He told me he liked me before and I ran as quick as I could in the opposite direction... 🙈 I felt awful and it was really awkward for a while. But it’s a bit easier now

[sidvt]

What's intension behind this question. He likes u may be he likes u for sex n a relationship if u like him go on if not tell him it if u have no intention to move forward with him u wouldn't ask this question

[Asker]

No I don’t have any intentions of moving forward with him, he’s a nice guy but not my type. And anyway, he’s taken. But it did get me curious why someone would do that to themselves

[sidvt]

We r humans n get feels toward opposite gender it's common whts ur type then

[sidvt]

May be u might have been good looking for him

[Asker]

Tall and broad is my type!!!

[sidvt]

So u like tall n broad aah then whts ur tall n broad?

[Asker]

6ft2 or taller and broad either muscle or a bit of fat

[sidvt]

I am 6 n not muscular bit a fat

[sidvt]

I m ur type then

[Asker]

Not quite tall enough - but also? You don’t live anywhere near me I bet!!!

[sidvt]

So what I can come to u my dear just u should say yes

[sidvt]

Whts ur height

[Asker]

Haha! I’m 5ft 5

[sidvt]

So sexy then I luv tht height whts ur special then

[sidvt]

So when are u inviting me

[Asker]

I’m not inviting you!!

[sidvt]

Why yaar u want me to come to u without invitation

[Asker]

No don’t want you to come

[sidvt]

Whts special feature in ur full 5ft5

[sidvt]

If gird says no it means a yes

[deebbbbb]

Just fuck him. If you are on here questioning it you are already thinking about it. You might like the risk and excitement

[Asker]

Mmmmm I don’t think you read the question

[deebbbbb]

I did. Just wondered what you need opinions for? Just do it already. You know deep down you want to know what it's like

[Crankor]

Backup? Wonders for kicks if he can get you to fall for him? Who knows

[Asker]

Haha maybe it is for kicks!

[Anonymous]

and this my friend, is why girls and guys, can't be, just friends

IT doesn't WORK, PEOPLE< GET IT IN YOUR FUCKING HEADS

[Asker]

It really doesn’t!!! But we’re colleaguess, I wouldn’t even say we’re friend

[Robsinsf53]

He doesn't believe he can't have you.

[hotstuff85]

I've been tourtured many times in my life

[Asker]

Lol! As have I - I just don’t know why he does it to himself

[hotstuff85]

is a man thing i guess... we love to torture the opposite gender as well

[Asker]

Lol!

[hotstuff85]

its the god honest truth

[es20490446e]

Short term thinking.

[Asker]

What do you mean?

[es20490446e]

He isn't thinking that much, just fantasising.

[Asker]

Ah ok

[Anonymous]

Ignore him