The guy that I like doesn't care about me or the way I feel, what do I do?

[Anonymous]

[btbc92]

You move on. THAT is what you do. And stop trying to go after strange men you don't know. Nobody owes you anything. You owe it to yourself to use common sense and not your feelings to make rational decisions. If you have attachment issues, which you do, you should seek a counselor and figure out WHY you feel the need to believe that your worthless if somebody rejects you. He clearly told you what he felt. You bounce back up and just do you.

[Asker]

I'm not really going after him, I was Just taking some advice. What makes you say he's strange? Unless you've met him before. And yes I do know him so it's not that I don't know him. Also what makes you think I have attachment Issues? I don't believe that to be the case. I'm not trying to say that I'm worthless without him.

[btbc92]

Are you FRIENDS with this guy for over a certain amount time. At least a year? If he is not even a friend he is a stranger. Being acquainted is not enough to assess if that person is right to date. You have attachment issues because you're concerned over a guy who doesn't give a damn about you or what you think.

[Asker]

Who said that he wasn't a friend? I considered him one and we were talking for at least 5 to 6 months. But know each other. It's not an attachment Issue, it's simply the fact that I miss him, and honestly who wouldn't miss someone who has not been around them that much? It isn't Just a guy, it's a guy I had feelings for. It would obviously be easy as cake to let go of a guy that didn't mean much to me and I didn't like very much. If I like a guy I care what he thinks. I care about the way he treats me. I care if he cares about the way I feel or not. I care about all his actions towards me and the way he behaves with me. All this stuff matters to me because he's the guy I like. He's not Just another passing guy, he's the guy I like.

[btbc92]

The fact that you miss him is an attachment issue because again, he doesn't care about you or the way you feel, right? What 'FRIEND' treat you like crap? You have feelings for somebody who you still didn't know well. You like a guy who doesn't like you. Period.

[btbc92]

5 to 6 months is still early. You need at least 2 years to truly access a person as a friend. You're too infatuated with this guy. And if you need to learn to not get so emotionally attached. You have to do this at a minimal of 20% of caring until he earns your trust. He has to show an equal amount of interest, which I take he didn't.

[Asker]

Yes I know that no friend is supposed to treat you like crap. I know I shouldn't like someone that is like that with me, but I don't know why I like him. Of course he showed Interest in who I am as a person from the start.

[btbc92]

Like I said. ATTACHMENT issues. Your interested in people who are unavailable probably because you've experienced that growing up. All signs of relationship problems stem from the home environment. A secure person would just walk away and not tolerate that. You wouldn't want to date somebody who is like that. Don't even be his friend. He doesn't have to date you. But he didn't have to say that either. That is not a real friend. Just get rid of the guy.

[btbc92]

I know because I struggled with the same problems growing up and I always wondered WHY I accept mistreatment like that from people. And I realized I accepted that more because of my damaging relationships between me and my parents because of their dysfunctional marriage that is also domestically abusive. God helped me get aware of it and is helping me with that. Don't strife yourself with that man. You deserve better treatment. You have to get stronger than this, and it starts by letting him go.

[Asker]

Yeah I think I got attached a little too hard and very quick. Well I am coming to a decision to walk away soon. If he wants me he'll come after me when he realises that I've stopped bothering with him or chasing him. But I don't think that's going to happen, unless he wants something and I'm his only hope left in the entire world. Even then I won't have him back in my life or take him back. I don't know why he said what he said, I'm aware he shouldn't have said that. But he still want for it, because he obviously said he doesn't care. By that from his actions and words he really doesn't.

The thing is we accept mistreatment from people like that, because we like them so much and Just want them in our life no matter how badly they treat us. In that way they take us for granted, they know we aren't going anywhere no matter what happens if what they say. So they keep going. We Just have to prove them wrong and Just walk away and not accept treatment like that. I realise that now. He's good to another girl that isn't me, I don't know why. But I honestly don't care anymore, she's not me so I shouldn't be bothered. I'm Just going to let go now... one day he'll miss me or I might come this his thoughts. But it will be too late.

by the way sorry for my late reply life gets busy lol and I was flooded with notifs.

[outside_Toronto]

Move on and find someone that can't get enough of you.

[Asker]

In this day and age, do you believe that there's anyone like that?

[outside_Toronto]

100% believe it

[Asker]

The world really is a harsh and cruel place these days...

[outside_Toronto]

I agree with you

[Just_a_human]

There's nothing you can do. Just let it go

[Asker]

Yeah it's hopeless to restore everything that once was, life is harsh but I'll Just have to accept reality 😞

[spartan55]

Eh, find a different guy?

[MlleCake]

Move on.

[Asker]

Yeah what else can I do at this point? Nothing really 😕

[MlleCake]

Why chase someone who doesn't see what's remarkable about you?

[Asker]

True. Yet I am. I got called out for it by him too. Now I'll Just give up. I can't change what anyone feels towards me or treats me like.

[PrincessGrail]

Nothing

[Asker]

Sure about that? 😔😭