Why does he get defensive if I ask about his female friends?

Question

For example, I asked him today what the relationship he had with this one girl flirting under his photo. I know he has female friends, and it was before we were dating but I was just wondering if he flirts with her still. I wasn't passive aggressive, just asked what their friendship was like.

He tells me they used to date and then just be friends. So Im kind of okay with it but taken aback and ask if he still flirts with her. He tells me he doesn't and then gets angry at me for asking. He said "Do I need to tell you about every girl I used to date now?"

I'm just kind of confused. Im not mad at him, and I trust him. He knows I'm not jealous. But is his response kind of a red flag? I don't get why he was so defensive about it if he was secure in their friendship?

Thoughts...

TruthBringer · Accepted Answer

Let me tell you something. If you're the type who doesn't have guy friends because you know they will try to get with you whenever they find the opportunity, then you have every right to expect your partner not to have female orbiters around him.

I can guarantee you that there is something going on between the two. This is your gut is telling you aswel. And our gut are very powerful at picking these signals. And by the way, do you really buy into the fact that they are just "friends" even after they dated? There is something called monkey branching and your dude is keeping his back-up plan warm whenever shit goes south with you (if he isn't already being unfaithful behind your back). You want a truly loyal guy? You're not with one. There are plenty of people facing the same problem as you and it almost never turned out okay.

If he truly had nothing to hide, then he wouldn't be defensive

magiusX26 · Accepted Answer

it shows you as insecure about him gaving female friends. also comes across as you dont trust him
especially the one he dated then stepped back and was just friends, which means exactly that, they are friends.

SuzieS · Accepted Answer

Could be innocent, difficult to say. Some guys just super needy for attention and reassurance that they're desirable. Make sure he knows how much you want him. And ask him if he's cool if some guy you used to date flirts with you in your pictures, and if it would make him curious enough to ask you about it. Some people are more comfortable in relationships where there partner doesn't take their presence for granted. You need to decide what kind of relationship will make you happy, and act accordingly.

MzAsh · Accepted Answer

His response was very defensive. But you need to start acting like you’re better than those girls. You’re coming off as too clingy.

Agape93 · Answer

Sounds like he could be flirting or misunderstanding your intent for asking.

purpletulip · Answer

In all my experiences if they get super defensive its because there is more to it and they prolly are doing something you woildent like. Thats happened to me more times then I can count. I always just pay more attention and do investigating and normal find our the truth. Nut id watch it for sure

Paul09 · Answer

It's 2020 everyone gets offended by any question these days. Or he does flirt with her and got defensive. It is a weird reaction.

flashgrandad · Answer

Sounds like he has secrets to hide. He is insecure of what he might let slip. If he is getting that defensive be very cautious as he could still have a thing for them?

Sevenpointfive · Answer

because you're stalking his female friends. that's a red flag in my book for a psycho girlfriend

bklynbadboy1 · Answer

He's hiding something why else would he be defensive. You feel me.

mrgspoter · Answer

Caus he's slowed to do anything and you just don't say anything back or questions

Gooblegobble · Answer

Red flag.

Iron_Man · Answer

Because he doesn’t want to be told what to do

Anonymous · Answer

he is a cheater

Why does he get defensive if I ask about his female friends?

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