'How can you tell if someone is making excuses not to talk to you?

[Anonymous]

[btbc92]

Simple. They just don't talk to you and rather speak to other mutual acquaintances you know. It is often a sign their still mad at you about something if they are avoiding you. If they are still talking to you by communicating in some way, it means to give them space. Trust is needed for healthy relationships of any kind. They'll talk when they are able. Sometimes when people are depressed they also do this. So don't be so quick to judge without understanding. But if you feel like it is that deliberate, reevalate your relationship with that person.

[Asker]

The thing is, they don't know I've been feeling sad. So they postpone things- I don't know it's genuine or not

[btbc92]

You need to communicate. It is as simple as that. If you don't communicate your feelings nobody may know how you feel. At the same time. If you find that you cannot trust your feelings to a person, it's not a healthy relationship.

[Asker]

I think he thinks l like him, and what he doesn't realize is I need a friend.

[Asker]

So he is particularly guarded, and sometimes it feels like he is making excuses without even caring if I find out he is making excuses

[btbc92]

So what you just told me, tell him that. I am guarded myself and would grow wary myself if somebody did the same. In fact, I had it done to me more than enough, and it was a bad decision to have certain guys around me, here included. But I believe in what God reveals to me and what is in a person's heart and soul. If your heart is true he will acknowledge that. If you know you really care for him, just tell him that. Your not looking for anything more than that. But if you still rebuffed, understand that you deserve better. You can't force anybody to want to be your friend, but he shouldn't treat you like an enemy and still remain in contact. He needs to figure himself out. You don't deserve to be hurt. I believe you are telling the truth, but just remember that you need to remember your own worth too. If you need a friend, be friends with a person who desires the same for you too. Friendships like romantic relationships and marriages are a two-way street. Period. If he doesn't want a friend or you around anymore, he needs to communicate that. Not be abused. Don't tolerate being emotionally abused.

[Asker]

I completely agree. I think if I were to guess, he may not mind me being his friend, but fears 1 like him and will always hope.

[btbc92]

Listen, unless you give him a reason to assume that, that is his problem. You don't have to tolerate that. You know you wouldn't and even if you would, you at least know not to hope with him if he is going to disappoint you anyway. To be honest, I think it is best you move on for your sanity before you get hurt.

[Iron_Man]

You can tell and men hate that

[Asker]

No what if the guy is doing it to a girl?

[Iron_Man]

Then you have to ghost him back