My boyfriend adds a bunch of unknown female followers to his private Insta account. I asked him about it, because it strange, he accused me stalking?

[Cubidu]

Recently my boyfriend added a bunch of unknown female followers to his Instagram account. He said it happened accidentally. It confused me, hurt me somehow and made me feel bad. I told him at once that I noticed and he accused me that I’m stalker. Is it really stalking? I unfollowed him not to get notifications about people I might know who comes from his account followers.. He blocked me saying I’m just a stalker. Isn’t it normal that you are stressed, confused and look what’s happening next with his account? The followers number kept growing and I asked him why is he doing that? He said he wanted to check how I’m stalking him, so he randomly added more followers. To prove himself and his friends that I’m a stalker…
Do I really should be chill and don’t think about bad things as he said? He said he will delete those followers later, but he hasn’t done that jet. Is it a red flag for me? Or am I going too much into his personal space? Few months ago I found his pictures and all the details on dating app. He said it’s not his account, but even a height was written in. I contacted police believing in him, to shut down the account in dating app and find out who it was if not him. Who stole his identity, but as soon as police was involved he stopped looking who did this, saying he knows a guy from IT who might find out who created dating app with his pictures and details…
he never shared any picture or activities of us on social media, claiming he doesn’t like to do that.

[SueShe]

Your account leads me to believe that he is a total red flag and you should distance yourself from him as soon as possible.

It is a known tactic to counter-attack with accusations when someone is cornered. You should never allow anyone to make you doubt of yourself. Because your boyfriend was caught, he came up with phony excuses about you stalking him.

He will certainly not remove those girls from his account and he seems not to want to talk about the situation seriously. That leads me to believe that he has a fundamental toxic behavior and that would be reason enough for me to sever this relation.

[Cubidu]

Yes he hasn’t removed, even added more. He said he will delete and when I asked is he going to do this for the third time, got grumpy and stopped talking with me for three days… this is really very painful and I don’t understand such behavior. I asked honestly to sit and talk, try to understand each other and sort things out..

[SueShe]

Your relation is unhealthy because the conversation seems to be unilateral and your boyfriend is not doing anything to remedy to this problem.

You have to give him an ultimatum. It is either you or the girls on his social media account. He seems to prioritize them over you so I wonder how healthy your relation is. To me, it sounds as if there is a number of red flags that need to be removed.

I suggest you prepare a list of issues that you see within your relation and to each issue, you bring up a solution to the problem. Ask your boyfriend to do a similar list, independent from yours. Thereafter, you sit together and go over both lists trying to find a consensus that is acceptable to both parties. The important thing is not to be angry or accusing because that would not only falsify the outcome but make things only worse. Good luck.

[oh_k789]

He likes to seduce you, but doesn't have for you a feeling worthy of being viewed as real love.

Unluckily for you, that seems not to be the case with you — thence the anxiety and minding his social media activity —. There's nothing wrong with that, but if on the other side the feelings don't match, it'll only translate into ache for you, and not occasional but constant.

[oh_k789]

I have to add that, in the past, even when madly in love with someone, I behaved like him for the first part, and pursued other attractive women, and all.
The "women hunter" side of a man can be there.
What is alarming love-wise is the reaction, before your complaints. I did this too, but I felt stung when I realized it pained her, and tried to stop doing it with all my me.

[Cubidu]

He stoped talking with me when I asked for the third time - is he gonna do what he said or not… we stay in the same apartment and he pretends I don’t exist…

[oh_k789]

It happens, as we go through life.
Is this the first time you experience that?

[Anonymous]

Look, there is clearly no trust here.

This is not a healthy relationship.

I think he is full of shit myself but it doesn't even matter.

[SignedAutographs]

I mean, you kind of are butttt, you're also in the right to ask him why he's doing so. I don't know, sounds like you just sort of caught him being an asshole. Red flag to me

[In_Trance]

I think you should break up you don't trust one another

[Klinklins]

You add a bunch of men and let him see

[Cubidu]

He said he doesn’t care who follow me and who do I follow. If I’m looking for a problem so I’ll find a problem…

[Klinklins]

My girlfriend does the same. She sometimes follows random street performers. They always have very low followers and those guys did dm her. I bursted out and asked her to stop following random guys like a low class girl.

But still she does that :) I think, we both should stop stalking and mind our own business lol.

[Iron_Man]

Big Red Flag Move on