Guys why do you act cold around your crush?

[Anonymous]

Guys why do you tend to act cold around your crush if this is something you may do?

Is it due to shyness or something else just I know that it can come across as you don’t like the person and it sends mixed signals, is this true that you may not like them?

I know girls can be guilty of this as well but I want to know from a guys point of view.

Thank you!

[Whatever2929292]

If I get nervous or if I am embarrassed. Look I try not to do that. Acting like that just causes the other person to figure you don't like them and they loose interest plus I don't want to be mean to someone who has not done anything wrong to me either.

Shyness sometimes... Depends on how cold we are talking

Some people also play hard to get... The dumbest shit ever. That most of the time causes someone to loose interest. Personally I figure if someone won't show interest they don't' like me or are playing games... But that is why some guys do it.

But understand not all guys are the same. If someone seems like they don't like you leave them alone since many times they genuinely don't. Even if they do if they are either taken or not ready for a relationship... Well... You're still getting rejected.

[Asker]

Thank you very much! I appreciate your answer and the detail you are putting in.

I guess for coldness I mean more in the case of giving terse answers at Times and sometimes appearing that you don’t want to talk to them even though you may have been talking fine the day before.

Kind of like hot and cold behaviour I guess or mixed signals especially if they only do it to you and are fine talking normally to other people consistently

[Whatever2929292]

You're welcome asker. Yea I don't know why some guys do this. Sometimes playing hard to get as I said. Other times they might be legitimately busy.

I would say that many times they aren't interested though. Again, if someone really is interested just assume they will SHOW interest.

If you really like someone then I suggest making a move and asking the person out. If they say yes then they either like you or at least are giving you a chance. No means... No. Don't overanalyze if if he really wants you and says NO. Then that is his loss and the ball is in his court at this point you done your part. Any other answer take it at face value and just leave it to him you done your part and if he likes you he will come around

[Whatever2929292]

I mean I can only speak for myself as well as what I have observed but I can't read minds and not all men are the same so I don't know

[Asker]

I understand, thank you very much again I don’t understand the hot and cold behaviour either with some people unless it is extreme shyness or maybe an introverted personality but I’m not too sure

[Whatever2929292]

Asker some women do this too and it makes ZERO sense. Then they wonder why people loose interest Well maybe if you shown interest they figured that you were not into them acting cold

[Asker]

Oh I know they can be like that you are right

[Whatever2929292]

Asker exactly makes no sense. I assume they are playing games (i. e playing hard to get) or are just not interested. Either way more often then not they cause the other to loose interest

[Asker]

I don’t really understand it either kind of puts you off dating in a sense haha

[Whatever2929292]

You're right and as I said more often then not someone finds someone who will show interest in them because some people actually like me

[Jamie05rhs]

We kind of have to. Because if we're nice then you interpret that as "desperation."

It's really not a game, though; I swear. We're just acting in a way that we've been taught is the most appropriate.

... But then again, sometimes we really ARE mad at you. Because sometimes y'all can be really annoying.

[Asker]

I understand what you are saying also thank you for responding! Though do you feel bad for acting this way if the person hasn’t done anything to you?

[Jamie05rhs]

You're welcome!

Yes; I do feel bad. Sometimes I hate myself lol. It's difficult to be mean when you have a soft heart.

[Jamie05rhs]

Thanks for the MHO!

[Dkc123]

"Is it due to shyness or something else just I know that it can come across as you don’t like the person and it sends mixed signals, is this true that you may not like them"

You answered your question.

Half truth is - due to shyness etc..

Full truth is - we want to send the mixed signals.

[Jamie05rhs]

Nah. I don't think anyone WANTS to send mixed signals.

[MrCommodore]

If I really liked a girl, I would probably only keep a distance if she was already in a relationship and was flirting, or maybe she had raised some of my red flags.
Otherwise I wouldn't be distant or cold

[Shy_Steve]

The truth is we don't usually know how to act around our crush, That's the problem.

So it usually comes of as cold.

[superdonkey]

We don't like to be vulnerable

[Asker]

I understand that also thank you for responding! Do you feel bad though after behaving like that towards your crush though?

[superdonkey]

Sometimes I feel regret that I didn't take the chance wonder where I might be today maybe I would have children maybe I wouldn't ask the consequences of my actions

[superdonkey]

Sorry autocorrect