What do guys think about themselves if they can't get a girl?

[Anonymous]

[Lliam]

I imagine they feel pretty bad.

I had girlfriends from the time I was 16. I was fit and super physically active.
When I was 26, I got handed an opportunity for a really good job but I had to cut my long, rock star hair and start wearing a suit. My entire outward persona changed. I didn't recognize myself in a mirror. I didn't look like I fit in with the kind of people I used to fit in with. But I also felt like an imposter at the job with my suit and haircut. I didn't really know how to act around grown ups.

After a couple of years, once I had been trained, I discovered that part of the job included getting taken to lunch every day to really good restaurants.

I started gaining weight through a combination of a sedentary job and the discovery of tasty food. And, aside from the free lunches, I had money to go to restaurants and buy whatever I wanted.

I already didn't like my new persona and then I gained weight. I wound up with no girlfriends for close to five years. I didn't like myself and I didn't want the kind of girlfriend who would want me.

I finally got myself together, went on Weight Watchers, and began to exercise a lot. It took me almost 6 months to loose 50 lbs. Somewhere along the line, I also got used to being a grown up. As soon as I looked good again, I stared dating again.

But that period of not having a girlfriend really sucked.

[Slartybartfast]

The good guys blame themselves usually. Isn't that true of most things?

It's a vicious and destructive cycle , you need confidence, but confidence is based on past success. So the guy looses the very thing he needs to succeed.

I don't expect women to understand and many will try heap scorn on men. I don't even need to read the responses to know this , because that's an automatic response from women who know less about what it takes for a man to be successful then a dog knows about quantum physics.

[MCheetah]

I read somewhere that building confidence comes in small, tiny amounts, not huge, massive successes. That you can compare confidence to money and wealth: Most expect to "win the lottery" or be born to rich parents (the genetic lottery), rather than saving little-by-little and reminding yourself of how much you've accrued. That true confidence is built over a lifetime, not handed to you by luck.

... I get it and understand it. The flaw here is, you still need SOME victories in order to build it up, though. Kinda hard to get rich when you're stuck as homeless.

[Lionman95]

Many guys would say they are failure so they look for a reason that makes them fail.
Some say it´s beauty so they adopt the idea that women just go out with Chads (attractive guys) and leave the majority of guys aside.
Some say it´s dick size.
Others say it´s their parents education that went wrong.
At the end of the day many of us guys find their reason that is often not more than an excuse but all the reasons have in common that they went wrong at a young age and therefore not changable anymore.

[DirkCoenen]

Personally, I can get episodes where I feel lonely and unlovable/unlikable. But they generally don't last longer than an afternoon and afterwards I am fine and move on with ny life because my life is pretty good.

[MCheetah]

We're evolutionary failures in a world of Chads and inflated female egos! 🤣
Good. Let this species rot and die away!

[Dan_cColt]

"Damn this sucks.." if it's a girlfriend meh I might be bummed out every once in a while, but if it's not being able to have sex with a chick/chicks for a while then it doubly sucks..

[FilmGuy93]

It can be pretty discouraging, especially if you see the guys that she goes for and they seem like a bit of a downgrade.

[Guy13]

WE have a very low self-confidence at this point.

[Mgtow1990]

Well been shot down for anything for 8 years now so guess to say it's takes a real beating on us especially now days

[Subarugirl]

From what I have seen they typically end up blaming women for it.

[Gangactivities911]

Is that not potentially a fair conclusion when it’s a widespread societal issue and not just them?

[Subarugirl]

@Gangactivities911 The grand majority of the global adult population is either in a romantic relationship or have been in one... what do you mean by widespread

[Gangactivities911]

Ok but in the us and the western world in general rates of romantic relationships, sex, and marriage are all falling especially for young men.

[Subarugirl]

@Gangactivities911 and that probably has more to do with less social pressures for women to marry young. Thanks to the increase in social and economic equality, women are not forced to be in a romantic relationship for social or economic reasons, but rather have the ability to chose their romantic partners based on other desirable attributes.

[Gangactivities911]

Or it’s like young women using their age to get more attractive partners than they realistically can get and then expecting men to not judge them for it when they r older.

[Gangactivities911]

And that’s fine and all women can do what they want but until they start behaving in a way that is suitable for long term monogamy or stop expecting long term monogamy I’m gonna continue to complain about it

[Subarugirl]

@Gangactivities911 so let me get this straight…. You’re upset that women do things that you don’t find attractive and then get upset when you can’t attract women you are attracted to… ? And some how this is the woman’s fault?

[Subarugirl]

@Gangactivities911 really it kind of just sounds like a minority of men that cannot attract the caliber of women that they think they deserve and are frustrated by it and instead of putting in the effort he becomes a more desirable partner would rather blame women instead….

[Agagagagaga]

@Gangactivities911 Dude don’t bother, all you’re going to learn is how terrible men are and how unfair the world is to women.

[Subarugirl]

@Agagagagaga being a terrible person has nothing to do with gender and everything to do with your character and actions…..

[Agagagagaga]

Sure it doesn’t.

[Subarugirl]

@Agagagagaga I don't know what fantasy world you live in but that’s how the real world works….

[Agagagagaga]

Any other insults you want to cook up?

[Subarugirl]

@Agagagagaga …. You’re the only one saying that men are terrible here…

[Gangactivities911]

Relationships today start with sex appeal unlike in the past. Women are less horny than men therefore women have an advantage when choosing a sex or relationship partner. This whole process seems unfair to me and makes me not want to seriously commit to women at least forever. A growing number of men feel similarly.

[Gangactivities911]

Is it so bad that I demand an equal sexual relationship or no relationship at all?

[Agagagagaga]

No, I didn’t say that at all. I was just helping someone understand what kind of worldview they can expect on GaG. 👍

[Subarugirl]

@Gangactivities911 uhhh… women are aroused by different things than men… it’s not like flipping a light switch. You can demand what ever you want but that doesn’t meant that you’re going to get it. If you want immediate gratification, there are other options that would better meet your needs. You guys. Can feel how ever you want but at the end of the day women are not domenstic slaves and if you want one you live in the wrong country, if you want someone who has the sex drive of a man then a man would better suite your needs

[Subarugirl]

@Agagagagaga the only person pushing that agenda here is you hon…

[Gangactivities911]

Why don’t u care about dating and sex being a fair game for men? And even more importantly why on earth do u think I should want a relationship with women if they can’t accept let alone make right their behaviors that are unfair to me? All im saying is u can not care but let’s see where the dating market ends up when we’re older my guess is not so favorably for women.

[Subarugirl]

@Gangactivities911 because men do not have the right to Womens bodies just like women do not have the right to mens bodies…. Dating and sex isn’t just fair game… if you want to have sex or date then you have to attract a partner…. Just like everyone else

[Gangactivities911]

Yes of course no one is entitled to someone else’s body. But why are women expecting a serious commitment after having sex with men more attractive than what they can realistically expect? How is that fair to the guy they date long term? Why should he get exposed to potential STDs and why should he not be having sex with her when she is younger and more attractive?

[Gangactivities911]

Women today by and large want a long term relationship but they don’t want to give that person preferential sexual treatment and I get it’s not all about sex but it kinda feels weird and uncomfortable to date a woman who some other guy got preferential sexual treatment from. Do u see my point?

[Subarugirl]

@Gangactivities911 then don’t sleep with those kinds of women and be the kind of man that women who don’t do those things want…. This isn’t a gender specific issue… don’t date the people you don’t like. It’s that simple.

[TheFlak38]

They don't think anything about themselves. They think about what society thinks of them.

[Twalli]

Girls don't like me, and I don't know why. At leas that was my thought before I got my first girlfriend.

[Anonymous]

Makes me regret turning down girls in the past to express interest in me because I feel I've looked at that from a different perspective now and my mindset has changed on that

[In_Trance]

Some guys shake it off and move on to the next one
Others beat themselves up over it

[Anonymous]

Thank fuck for that, I don't have the time to spare so plans are still going well

[Anonymous]

That life is a lot less complicated. 🤣