What does it mean when a guy doesn't wanna hangout with friends or anyone and says I need to focus on myself?

[Anonymous]

I feel like it's my fault.

[DeltaRecon]

Being in a relationship with someone that is in AA. Life is a roller coaster with her. I love my wife. Her addiction actually split us up at one time in our life. She finally got back on her feet but still has points I gotta give her space. There are great times to be around her and then times I feel like I’m dead to her. I know she still loves me but when she says she needs time to herself, I try my best to give it to her. Sometimes it’s really hard. Just give him support, show him you love him, and stick by him through this and he will love you even more.

[Anonymous]

Considering your comment about him being in AA, it sounds like he's trying to get his life back on track. He might be at a point where going out with friends is a big trigger for him to drink. He probably wants to create some space from the temptation while he gets his head back on straight

[Asker]

How long does that usually take?

[Opinion Owner]

A few months, years, a lifetime, depends how motivated you are. Addiction is one hell of a rollercoaster. I wouldn't pressure him, just be supportive. It's absolutely not your fault by the way. Even if you're the one providing the booze, he'll still have to come to terms with his decision to accept said alcohol. At this point though, knowing he's in recovery, it would certainly not be a nice thing to offer any liquor

[Asker]

Well he knows I miss him and strongly care and love him.

I don’t smoke or drink at all by the way

[Opinion Owner]

I know, I'm just really trying to drive home the fact that it's not your fault

[Opinion Owner]

That's good though. Knowing your friends will be there for you in dark times is a very nice feeling

[Wise4myage]

He's not interested in being friends with you or anyone else.

[Asker]

I mean we played a game last night. He's doing AA and starting from square one.

[Wise4myage]

People in AA probably shouldn't be dating.

[Asker]

It wouldn’t be dating and I don’t smoke or drink