Guys, What is he doing?

[Anonymous]

I have a guy friend that’s in a relationship. We have established a really strong bond with each other. He says he has feelings for me, but he didn’t want them to get stronger if we have sex with each other. But he has his moments to where he’ll get around me and want to do intimate things. But he says we’re “buddies”. Why is he doing things like that but saying I’m his buddy?

[nitsuj86]

If he was really trying to avoid it, he just wouldn't hang out with you. Unless you were good friends before his current girlfriend, but if that is the case, then why didn't he date you then?

Sounds to me like he's keeping you around as either an option B, if things with his current girl don't work. Or someone he can possibly cheat with.

If he's dating someone, but telling you he has feeling for you, and doesn't want to complicate that with sex, well duh. You shouldn't be fucking other people or talking to them about it at all. But if he says all this, and you continue to pursue his attention or actually do hook up with him. Well then you have basically agreed to being a side chick.

If you were dating him, would you want him to be telling some other girl all of this stuff behind your back? If you do date him, it will most likely happen to you as well.

[Asker]

No I wouldn’t like it if it was me

[nitsuj86]

Well, then I would tell him that, and either stop hanging out with him, or tell him if you keep saying things like that to me I will tell your girlfriend.

But unless he continues after the warning, don't say anything. Just stay out of it.

[JPresidente]

Is he in a relationship with you or someone else?

[Asker]

With someone else

[JPresidente]

Then he probably trying to be true to her and withhold his attraction to you.

[Asker]

Understood, so maybe we can’t just be friends. He expressed how much he cares and values me but turns around and do things like that. Or even ask to see what I’m doing with other guys

[JPresidente]

This means that he is jealous and would like to either be in a relationship with you or he is interested in only sleeping with you.

[Asker]

Okay

[peterrezeeek]

he want to keep u avilable for sex...
maybe he won't lost u as a friend I don't know exactly

[spartan55]

To keep you interested/available.

[Asker]

But why is he trying to keep me available when we can just be friends?

[spartan55]

No guy wants to be friends.

[Asker]

Yeah that’s what I’m noticing. He even tries things like asking to see what I’m doing with other guys. But then like to say him and I are “buddies”

[spartan55]

That's his bullshit cover.

[Asker]

Wow that’s crazy

[spartan55]

Very common.