What am I supposed to do when bunch of guys stare at me?

[Jemini_Crocket]

It happens to me frequently when I come to (my fave) local bistro. Last time I went there, I didn't wear anything provocative, actually I felt kind of bad about myself bcs I've got extra pounds since Christmas, I went there to buy my parents lunch and just after coming inside about 2 tables (6-8 guys, both younger and older) ALL stared at me.

Staring always makes me nervous, I've tried to stay calm so I just straight up went to buy that lunch, after leaving they stared at me once again. Not a usual stare either a huge CAPS STARE : They probably didn't realize how uncomfy and nervous it made me but I just couldn't respond any other way...

So I need to know, next time it happens, what should I do? I have tried to look at each of them to notice if there's not my type sitting in there but they just didn't give me a chance! :|

How to proceed
How to stay calm
I hate being like this. 23 year old and still getting easily frustrated and nervous, shy af.

[Finchie40]

Just smile , whether you like the attention or don’t like the attention just smile and go on with what you are there for , If those guys want to get the balls to approach you they will try to , if not then don’t worry about it , then they didn’t have the balls , but if they got the balls they will try to get
Your attention , if you don’t want their attention just be nice about it , make up something like awww thanks but I already have a boyfriend but thank you for the compliment and walk away , one thing I learned is never be rude to someone that finds you attractive whether you find them disgusting , not your type etc.. just be nice about it and lie to them saying you are already involved, if they don’t take no for an answer that’s when you can start getting rude

[Bklynbadboy12]

That just means your gorgeous and they like what they see take it as a compliment

[FilmGuy93]

You should probably start hyperventilating and profusely sweating. Throw in a few forced, extremely loud laughs for good measure.

Or you could... ya know... just not think about it and act like a regular person.

[MrOracle]

The worst thing you can do is get upset.

Instead, look at them with a smirk and say: "Did you grow up living with your dad? Because your mom would have taught you that girls don't mind if you give them a bit of a look, but outright staring is just rude, and isn't going to win you any points with the ladies. Do you not want women to enjoy your company? You can do better, boys." And end with a slightly amused smile.

This will shame them, and teach them a bit of manners, without getting confrontational. The key is to stay relaxed and just maintain that slightly amused smile - YOU aren't bothered by them, per se, but you know other women would, and you're trying to do these poor, clueless bastards a favor by teaching them just a little bit about the world.

This approach will work FAR better than any other - it will get your point across but is unlikely to escalate. I can't guarantee that it will work, but I'd say that you've got about an 80% chance of success, and most importantly, you NEVER give your power away to them doing it this way.

[OfMiceandMen]

Just smile back and wave hi. Most of the time it will make the guys checking you out quickly turn away bc they're embarrassed and now they're the nervous ones.

You may even create this whole thing where they are trying to figure out which one you were waving at and possibly argue over the point.

You could have a lot of fun with it! I like to stir the pot sometimes... 😁

[loveslongnails]

Take a video of them staring at you. Then on your way out, ask them for their names so you can post it on social media and give them the proper notoriety they deserve. :) Even if you're too afraid to do the second part, I'm dead serious about the first part.

[nawtee_me]

Ask if they would like to get a picture with you. That would probably do it. However if they say yes then you may have to just do it a one group pic. I know that is out of the box but they won’t stare anymore and will be friendlier from that point forward.

[SnowedIn]

What I have done in similar situations is look back at the group (one trick is focus on a glass in the center of the table) and say in a clear voice, "Can I help you with something?" The staring will stop.

[AviatorTom]

Simple... stare back at them, smile, and keep walking. You'll let them know you enjoyed the attention, but you're not interested in anything more.

[Guanfei]

Do nothing. Just move along with your life and forget them. You're just gorgeous, and they appreciate the view, but as long as none of them try anything, just forget, unless you want to make the first step.

[TacosRAwesome]

https://www.youtube.com/embed/onZRb2aTlj4

See above

[AimeeKyle]

take a deep breath. Stare back, make eye contact with each of them and keep moving/ do your thing.

[Billlewis]

Turn around and say, 'My father is the chief of police, so you might want to mind your manners'

[alcorriher]

be yourself and dont get worked up. just casually smile back. be friendly

[Alex8736]

if you pick your head up and stare right at them making eye contact watch how fast they will look away

[BJP21]

Simply say what's wrong? Too scared to approach and ask me out? Then walk away.

[JPresidente]

There’s not much you can do unless you want to give them a mean look back or approach them and tell them off. Just act like they don’t exist and you do you.

[spartan55]

Wow, men find you attractive. You have it so rough.

[TallAnon]

Honestly, nothing. Guys look at cute girls, that's all. You don't owe them a response.

[Anonymous]

Do what I do. Anytime a woman stares at me for too long I look at her and say very loudly for everyone in the vicinity to hear, "anyone who stares at me that long better be buying me flowers".

[BoobMan]

Geez Jemini! I hadn't realized you had such crippling shyness!

[Jemini_Crocket]

Don't let me get started on my crippling depression! XD

[BoobMan]

Oh no! :(

[TheSpaceGnome]

Nothing, just ignore them and go about your day.

[Jennz6]

Make eye contact if you want to talk with them

[PatriceONeal]

How did you know they were staring unless you were too?

[Jemini_Crocket]

I was not, but you can feel it when someone stares and they all turned to me when I looked around the room once I entered.

[PatriceONeal]

Well if they keep looking after you came in maybe one found you attractive. Should have looked to see if any were your type.

[CuriousMufuxka]

I fail to see the problem. I've had guys stare at me ready to beat the shit out of me! Get your grub and walk away.

[abc3643]

How did they "not give you a chance"?

[Jemini_Crocket]

They've continued to stare until I was out of sight. Made me feel small and I just can't look at someone from a group like that if other 6 people are staring at me. :|

[abc3643]

What sort of "chance" were you expecting?

[Jemini_Crocket]

Just not staring the whole time would help. Looking away, maybe realizing that I am uncomfortable.

[abc3643]

Honey, I hate to say this because it's direct and to the point and you're not going to like it:

You can't bend the world to what you want.
You have to bend to it.

====
Males will "check out" (stare) at females. It may be rude and uncomfortable, but we do it; especially when young when we haven't yet realized that what we do makes women uncomfortable. (Ever heard of "the lookaway" - guy stares at girls but suddenly stops when she sees him?)

So, these guys are going to do that.

Meanwhile, what exactly is it that you want?
A man simply to approach you or that you wish you were in a group of females so you'd feel less focused-on and can stare at them in your own right? What?

[Jemini_Crocket]

Staring is something you can never really get 100 % used to but I try, the difference here that it was so many guys at once, that's all.
I do not mind attention, but sometimes guys could just lower the intensity a little. If that is so much to ask for then sue me :D

[msc545]

Just ignore them. Staring at people is rude.

[PeterLegg91]

Just ignore them, you wearing a belt today?

[eagle1951]

say keep dreaming y'all

[roy_ricky09]

Start acting crazy

[Dav1dTh0ma389]

Stare back