How do I start a conversation with the guy that I like?

[Anonymous]

Ok, for context I'm a 23 year old girl and there's this guy that I like (he's around my age, maybe a couple years older than me) and we run into eachother 3 or 4 times a week at the bus stop that's close to my university (he works there as a driver).

At the beginning I noticed that he would always stare at me from afar but then he would completely ignore me when we were in close proximity (he wouldn't even look at me or acknowledge my presence at all, as if he was purposely trying to avoid eye contact with me) and If I caught him staring he would immediately look away, so I thought that maybe he disliked me for some reason, or he knew that I liked him (he caught me staring at him a couple of times, too), or maybe he thought that I was ugly and that's why he was staring lol?

This went on for like a month, where we would stare at eachother till we were caught and then we would look away. That was until one day he walked past me and when I looked up at him he was already looking at me, and then he smiled and said "hi, how are you?". Since that happened, we say hi whenever we run into eachother and sometimes he adds little things like "hi, good morning" or asks me how I'm doing, but that's really it. I would also like to mention that he doesn't greet or talk to anybody else that's there, just me.

He seems to be a little shy and quiet sometimes, and I don't know how to go from a simple "hi" to actually having a conversation with him because I get nervous around him and I'm scared that I'm gonna say the wrong thing or act so awkward that he thinks I'm weird (plus I have no idea if he wants to talk to me at all 😕). I would appreciate some help here 😅

[MaazHussain]

Starting a conversation with someone you like can be nerve-wracking, but here are some tips to help you out:

• Start with a simple question or comment. If you notice something about him, like a new haircut or a shirt you like, use that as a starting point for a conversation. You could also ask him about his day or how work is going.
• Find common ground. Try to find out if you share any interests or hobbies. If you do, talk about those things and see where the conversation takes you.
• Be confident and be yourself. Remember that he's just a person, like you, and there's no need to be nervous or act differently than you normally would. Just be yourself and let the conversation flow naturally.
• Ask him questions. People love talking about themselves, so asking him questions about his life, hobbies, or interests can be a great way to keep the conversation going and get to know him better.
• Keep it light and fun. Try to avoid heavy or controversial topics and keep the conversation light and fun. You want him to enjoy talking to you and to want to continue the conversation in the future.
• Take it slow. If you're not sure if he's interested in you, take it slow and don't rush into anything. Just enjoy getting to know him and see where things go from there.

Remember, the most important thing is to be yourself and have fun! Good luck!

[Weapon77]

You could start by asking how he started working as a bus driver. And that could allow you to ask a more fun question like what the wildest story he has from driving a bus because they see some crazy shit. And you might be able to gauge if he likes you at that point by if he gets a bit excited.

[PrettyPriya]

You can't be scared or apprehensive if you like him. You just have to go for it. It is not likely you are going to say the wrong thing either. What do you know about this guy? I would start there and look for an opener about something you know he is interested in.

The thing about waiting and never taking that plunge is that you can miss out on something great and will be left wondering what could have been. This is exactly what would have happened to me.

I met my now husband out of the blue. I knew that if I didn't make a move, I might never see him again. I work in healthcare (not a doctor or nurse) and he was in our medical practice for a sports injury. Obviously not the best of times to strike up a conversation. I knew he was coming back so I waited. I was nervous as hell right up until that day.

He came back for evaluation and at discharge from care, that is when I started a conversation. I knew almost nothing about him, except that he was in for a sports injury. I used that as my opening to a conversation. I didn't know what sport but asked if he was feeling better and able to get back to his sports soon.

Conversation went on from there and the rest is history.

[Asker]

I'm so happy for you guys 🥺
Thank you for taking the time to respond in such detail. I feel like when I asked this question I didn't clarify that what makes me feel a little nervous/insecure about talking to him is his job. I feel like as a bus driver he must come across hundreds of pretty (ier) girls every single day, so that kind of makes me wonder why he would like me when he probably sees a lot of beautiful women all the time. I know that their beauty is not my lack and I'll never know if I never try. I'm trying to work on that.
Maybe I'll just start talking to him little by little every day, make small talk, until it naturally turns into an actual conversation? I also want to take it easy just to see what his reaction is and figure out if he's okay with me talking to him because I don't want to make things awkward or make him uncomfortable.
Thank you once again 💗

[PrettyPriya]

You’re welcome and that sounds like the perfect plan. Just start slow and see how conversation builds and flows. No need to go all in the first time. Best of luck to you!

[PrettyPriya]

Thanks you for the MHO 🙂

[Asker]

Absolutely! Thank you for responding :)

[Sour-rose]

Open ended questions. I've learned this from my selling jobs that if you give the choice of "Yes or no?" it's done before you even said no. But if you have a broad way of asking said question, it could get them to talk more to you. ;)

[FilmGuy93]

Just talk about hobbies and stuff. All you have to do to start the conversation is say "hello."

[Guy13]

You do not have to do anything but say "Hey, and comment on something you like..." You have to take a risk in this life. It is the way it is. If you risk and fail at least you know, however, if you pass this by then you will never have any idea what could have been.

[AsaKyo]

Ask him if he prefers to dip his fries in ketchup, honey mustard or ranch

[Jamie05rhs]

Lmao! I do the same thing!! 😂

[Jamie05rhs]

And I'm sorry, but I have no advice for you. Because I don't even know the answer myself!

[Asker]

what do you mean you do the same thing?
Lmao no worries about the advice, I think we're all just trying to figure things out and in the meantime we just act like we know what we're doing. I'm not very confident around guys that I find attractive, so I think that the advice (for now) is to just swallow my insecurities and fake it till I make it 😂

[Jamie05rhs]

I mean I do exactly what you wrote! Haha. I'll look at a girl from a distance if I think she's pretty. But if she enters my direct vicinity, I'll pretend like I don't notice her. I'll pretend like she doesn't exist.

[Asker]

So you're saying I might have a chance? I thought he was purposely ignoring me because he didn't like me, until he said hi and that left me kind of confused. That's why I didn't know if I should try talking to him or not. Thank you!
ps: if you like a girl, just let her catch you looking at her from time to time. She might get the hint that way. If you completely ignore her she's gonna think you hate her or something 😂

[Jamie05rhs]

You're welcome!

[Jamie05rhs]

But no... haha. I can't do that. I'm too intense, and I have RBF. So that would come off as creepy.

[Jamie05rhs]

Oh, and yes, I think you do have a chance. Definitely.

[Julia1244]

Say hey and show you interested

[Asker]

The thing is, I don't want to make it obvious that I'm interested in case he doesn't reciprocate, you know? So I'm just wondering how can I talk to him without giving it away

[Iron_Man]

Just start talking

[teddybearthefirst]

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