Will a guy at work show everyone that I was texting him?

[Anonymous]

It was stupid stuff like hey how are you are you at work today. But it was for like several days.

[ShiftingMonke]

Was he responding to them, or were you sending them regardless?

[Asker]

I did not send text first. He was sending me triple texts

[ShiftingMonke]

Then you've got nothing to worry about. He can't show your texts without showing his own. But it's best to avoid romantic interests with coworkers.

[Asker]

Yeah I honestly felt uncomfortable cause the whole time I was thinking Ok my whole workplace is gonna see these texts. You can’t relax around a coworker. Lol.

[Asker]

I always wonder why guys ask women out at work.

[ShiftingMonke]

Yeah, he's more cringe for showing them off than you texting him. Don't sweat it.

As for why men pursue coworkers, I'd guess it's because they see these women all day long. That's plenty of time to wonder inappropriate thoughts or desires. Not to mention the women can't really leave if the male coworkers make things uncomfortable.

I spend about 35% of my time here trying to convince folks to NOT pursue coworkers.

[Asker]

Interesting. Are you saying the guys pursue us at work cause they know we basically can’t get away? xD.

Cause not gonna lie that is what I deal with at almost all my jobs I’ve had… it’s been so awkward trying to handle men trying to get at me and they get angry and emotional if you don’t respond in whatever way they like at any given moment. It’s really ridiculous.

[ShiftingMonke]

That's what I saw at previous employers (when I worked with other people) and it's why I never hit on any woman while she was wearing a nametag. I was friendly but professional, and if I thought they were flirting back, I just assumed they were extra friendly and never pursued. I'm not saying men are all predators, I just don't think they perceive how tiring it can be. Now I'm married so I don't have to worry about anyone flirting with me, and I'm totally okay with that.

[Asker]

I often was or am extra friendly. And now I have learned to pick up more easily when men are starting to seem too interested. But it doesn’t help cause the sharks are gonna try to bite no matter what.

[ShiftingMonke]

Get a fake ring, that'll keep the more polite ones at bay. And aside from going to HR, it's just gonna have to be a thing you deal with, as much as I hate to say it. There are no easy solutions to stop it.

[Asker]

I’ve heard. Heard that just not working is the solution lol. World sucks for women.

[ShiftingMonke]

The world is rough for both sexes; in this situation, you've definitely got the raw end of the deal.

My wife stays at home and she loves it; if that's your goal, I'm sure you can achieve it!

[Asker]

It certainly is. Thank you.

[ShiftingMonke]

You're most welcome; and good luck moving forward!

[spartan55]

Why would anyone even care what you are texting some guy?

[Iron_Man]

Not really, unless he’s really excited about your Text

[Asker]

I didn’t say anything exciting in them. But maybe he wants to show everyone a girl is finally talking to him.

[Asker]

I decided to block him though because he asked out every other girl I heard.

[Iron_Man]

Try to work it out and give him a chance

[Asker]

You think I should date a coworker

[Iron_Man]

It’s not really recommended but if you like him it’s fine

[Asker]

Ehh he’s nice but even Asperger’s can be a player

[Iron_Man]

It’s your decision

[MrCommodore]

No, not usually, most guys aged 30+ are discreet

[boggboss]

Don't see why he would