If a guy calls you beautiful, does it mean he is attracted to you?

[Anonymous]

[MrOracle]

It *usually* means he's, at least, PHYSICALLY attracted to you. It can, and sometimes does, mean that he's ROMANTICALLY attracted to you, but more often, he's only expressing a physical attraction, and you should assume, until proven otherwise, that he's ONLY expressing physical attraction.

I say that because WAY too many women conflate physical/sexual attraction as being romantic/relationship/commitment attraction, but those are two VERY DIFFERENT THINGS for men, and if a man isn't specifically talking about a relationship or a commitment or your future together, then the ONLY safe assumption you can make is that he's only considering you as a casual sex partner, and only expressing physical attraction.

You should also understand that men commonly "sleep down" - meaning if a girl is a 4/10, and the guy is a 7/10, the guy will often be happy to have casual sex with the girl, even though he's got more social market value than she does - because it's nothing to a guy to sleep "down the scale." But that's not true of relationship commitments - most men do not "commit down" the social market value scale, and just because this hypothetical 7/10 man slept with this hypothetical 4/10 woman does not now put her on his level when it comes to a relationship. The 7 guy may sleep with a 4, or even a 2, but he's rarely going to commit to a girl who is less than a 7.

I'm not suggesting that any of this represents you or this guy - I'm just putting this out there as general knowledge. I recommend you clearly express what you are looking for, and that you make sure he's looking for the same thing - and if he's not, you should end things and move on until you find someone who is.

[Asker]

I'm just going to remind you that a 4/10 to one guy , may very well be a 7/10 to another guy. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. There is no such thing as a strict objective scale of beauty.

[Asker]

and plus, dating and commitment is far more about less about looks than you think. When you're dating, you're looking at the entire package. Not just a strict numerical scale of beauty that decides absolutely who you will end up with. The way you talk about love is entirely soulless. It sound like a computer algorithm that decides everything.

[MrOracle]

"I'm just going to remind you that a 4/10 to one guy , may very well be a 7/10 to another guy. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. There is no such thing as a strict objective scale of beauty."

Of course this is true - BUT it's equally as true that the vast majority of people are going to give a score that is very close to the average, which is how markets work. Markets determine the value of something based on what the majority of people are willing to "spend" on it - i. e., what value most people assign to it. Yes, occasionally someone gets a great deal and pays a low price for something with higher value, and occasionally someone gets screwed by paying a high price for something of low value, but those are the outliers at the far extremes of the bell curve.

You can always point out a rare exception, but 99% of the time, you won't fall under an exception, but rather the rule.

[MrOracle]

"and plus, dating and commitment is far more about less about looks than you think."

I was talking about social market value - you can also call it "relationship value" or "commitment value" - and while looks are a significant part of that value equation, it's certainly not the only thing, and I wasn't suggesting otherwise.

Men will have CASUAL SEX with a woman simply based on her appearance (or, at least, HEAVILY based on her appearance), but both men and women care about a lot more than that when it comes to relationships - but beauty is usually a significant component, or must be compensated for heavily by other things if it is lacking. Women also generally tend to care about a man's status, his career/income, his confidence, his intelligence, and his ability to protect, while men tend to also care about the woman's youth, purity, femininity, cooperation, submissiveness, and usually whether she's family-oriented rather than career-oriented.

So, yes, there are definitely other factors involved - I just didn't elaborate due to lack of space.

[Asker]

There isn't always such a thing as "vast majority of the market". Because truth is, there had been guys that have been absolutely crazy about me and chased me like no other while there are other guys who say that I am a 4/10.

And secondly, just because you are good looking, it doesn't mean you have good game. When it comes to selling yourself, there are plenty of other factors that come into play.

When you're looking to buy a product, you aren't just looking for something that looks nice. You want it to also hold substance.

[Asker]

yea... just how many men have things like high status, income. how many women out there look like super models?

truth is, the average typical joe has no game, no status, no high income net worth.

its just average commoners settling for other average commoners.

Average people aren't celebrities.

[MrOracle]

I agree - MOST people are average, or pretty near average. The vast majority of people are a 5 or a 6, with the next group out being 4s or 7s. That's now standard distributions work. If you look at this chart, you'll see that (approximately) 95% of all people are between a 4 and a 7, with higher and lower scores being exponentially rarer the further they are from the middle.

The problem is that men tend to have a solid idea of where they rank. I'm not saying there aren't a few delusional ones - I've certainly met a few - but the majority of guys are under no illusion, because their outcomes tell them loud and clear where they rank. They also tend to score women quite realistically.

But women, ON AVERAGE, score themselves FAR higher than their actual score, and in turn score men far LOWER.



As a result, around 80% of women all think they deserve at least a 9 (essentially, a guy in the top 10%, meaning a 9.1-10 out of 10). Most women are chasing these men exclusively, and utterly ignore all other men. The thing is, they CAN attract these highly attractive men - but ONLY by offering them casual sex, and often not even on an exclusive arrangement (meaning: he can still sleep around). Most of the women convince themselves that SHE will be the one who changes his mind and will win his commitment, but the reality is this happens about once in a million times. These top guys sleep with hundreds, often thousands of women, none of whom ever get a commitment, and the women go from guy to guy to guy, racking up a body count and a lot of trauma and baggage and mental health damage. This does not result in good outcomes for these women.

[Asker]

quite funny you're complaining about that because you keep touting around that women expire by 30. you can't stand it when tables are reversed right?

[MrOracle]

This has nothing to do with me. I have a woman.

I'm making a generalization about western culture as a whole. You won't win any argument trying to attack me personally - that's called an Ad Hominem attack, and it's a sign that you don't have anything to argue against the points I'm making.

I've got plenty of data to back up my positions. I'm simply just explaining the dating world as it exists, and what people can do about it to get the best outcomes. I'm trying to educate, so that people can make changes and get better results. It's not in my best interests for anyone to fail.

[Asker]

Men love talking about how they will never date an older women. But they can't stand it when women only want to be with top 10 percent of men.

I love it

[MrOracle]

Most men are merely amused. We know how it's going to end for those women who pursue those men - and it won't be pretty.

[Asker]

Women only want top 10% of men because you need to realize that men are an option to modern women, not a necessity (like 100 years ago). When she wants a man but dont need one, she has higher standards

[MrOracle]

"she wants a man but dont need one"

That's what women are taught to think when they're younger - and it's true when they're younger. But by the time they hit 35, and realize that they NEED a man, most have blown their chances at getting the kind of man they want. Certainly, those top 10% guys don't even look their way anymore, but even the guys that they knew were good guys, but who they otherwise ignored, assuming they'd always be there - those guys don't want her either. By this time, typically with a high body count and lots of trauma and baggage, her choices are to accept a guy WAY down the scale, or be alone. And most women do NOT want to be alone for the last 2/3 of their life, regardless of what they think in their 20s.

[Asker]

women actually need men LESS as they get older. why? women grow more financially stable as they get older.

This is why modern men complain so much about women's standards today. Women have higher standards today than 100 years ago because they don't need men.

[Asker]

@MrOracle

the more financially stable a woman is, the less likely she needs a man.

Dumbass like you like to delude yourself into believing lies to make yourselves feel better.

Men are not a necessity nowadays. Single women can do absolutely everything, including birthing children / starting families on their own WITHOUT MEN.

[Anonymous]

You already know the answer babe

[Wise4myage]

Yes of course that's what it means.

[Jamie05rhs]

We need more info. What's the context?

[Anonymous]

Not always.

[Anonymous]

yes..