Change in behaviour. Why?

[Anonymous]

I know this guy for the last 2 years, and we are very good friends, and for the last couple of months he has been behaving different. He became very touchy, always teasing me and everyday when we say goodbye he gives me long tight hugs with neck kisses.

He has now started hugging me from behind, resting his head on my shoulder and kissing my neck.

He only behaves like this when we are alone.

He has a girlfriend, so I don't he has fellings for me. So why would he start behaving like this?

[Anonymous]

He can want you despite having a girlfriend.

[Oliverlogan263]

There are a few possible reasons for this guy's change in behavior:

1. He enjoys the attention and thrill of flirting, even if it's not serious. Some people get a confidence boost from having someone show interest, even if they don't intend to act on it.

2. He may be testing the waters to see if you're interested in something more. His physical affection could be a way of gauging your reaction and level of attraction.

3. He could have developed romantic feelings for you but knows he can't act on them due to having a girlfriend. So he expresses them in a somewhat inappropriate way.

4. He may have a pattern of crossing boundaries and pushing limits in relationships. His girlfriend's relationship sets one boundary, but yours allows for more physical intimacy.

5. He could have a selfish or immature streak that leads him to seek attention and physical intimacy wherever he can get it, consequences be damned. His girlfriend is "safe," you are "fun."

Regardless of his reasons, his behavior is inappropriate given that he has a girlfriend. The touching, hugging and kissing all go beyond what is acceptable in a platonic friendship.

I would recommend setting clear boundaries. Tell him something like "I enjoy our friendship but the physical affection has become uncomfortable for me. I'd like us to go back to how things were before." If he's a true friend, he'll respect your boundaries. But be prepared to distance yourself if he continues crossing lines.

At the end of the day, how he treats his girlfriend is honestly between them. All you can control is communicating your own boundaries and needs in this friendship. Don't hesitate to put some distance if he can't respect that. You deserve a friendship without unnecessary confusion or drama.

[Anonymous]

I went through the exact same scenario. Thank you for asking.

There are a few possible reasons for this guy's change in behavior:

1. He enjoys the attention and thrill of flirting, even if it's not serious. Some people get a confidence boost from having someone show interest, even if they don't intend to act on it.

2. He may be testing the waters to see if you're interested in something more. His physical affection could be a way of gauging your reaction and level of attraction.

3. He could have developed romantic feelings for you but knows he can't act on them due to having a girlfriend. So he expresses them in a somewhat inappropriate way.

4. He may have a pattern of crossing boundaries and pushing limits in relationships. His girlfriend's relationship sets one boundary, but yours allows for more physical intimacy.

5. He could have a selfish or immature streak that leads him to seek attention and physical intimacy wherever he can get it, consequences be damned. His girlfriend is "safe," you are "fun."

Regardless of his reasons, his behavior is inappropriate given that he has a girlfriend. The touching, hugging and kissing all go beyond what is acceptable in a platonic friendship.

I would recommend setting clear boundaries. Tell him something like "I enjoy our friendship but the physical affection has become uncomfortable for me. I'd like us to go back to how things were before." If he's a true friend, he'll respect your boundaries. But be prepared to distance yourself if he continues crossing lines.

At the end of the day, how he treats his girlfriend is honestly between them. All you can control is communicating your own boundaries and needs in this friendship. Don't hesitate to put some distance if he can't respect that. You deserve a friendship without unnecessary confusion or drama.

All the best and god bless.

[BarryLiverstone]

Because you allow it. Also he knows you are into him