People say guys that come in strong to me are desperate. Is to at wrong to judge them? And am I desperate?

[Anonymous]

First of all I think it’s wrong to judge someone like that.

secondly if they’re desperate then so am I because I’m giving them a chance.

And thirdly if I’m desperate cools it be because I’m an adult orphan (no fam or friends)? I don’t do fornication though so it’s not like I threw all my standards to the wind. I just am a romantic soft sweety who needs love.

[strateguy632]

that kind of judgements is appropriate. we should make character judgements and assessments we are not judging them as guilty or deserved punishment so we should assess and judge most things including checking if someone is desperate and finding for what they are desperate for.

[Asker]

A guy saying he loves me quickly is desperate though? Don’t you have to sacrifice something if value to be considered desperate? And then people say he doesn’t love me cause he doesn’t know me. The advice is contradictory.

[Asker]

Something of value*

[Anonymous]

desperate and wanting or desiring are two different things.

Everyone thinks if you want someone you are desperate. People love the person who doesn't want them. And then complain they can't find anyone.

Being desperate is wanting someone and not believing you have a chance is hell. It causes self sabotage and then manifest the very thing they are afraid of.

[Anonymous]

Desperate is a strong word in this context so I wouldn't go that far.

[Iron_Man]

You don’t have to date them