Guys, should I tell him I don't like him?

[Anonymous]

I really really like this guy who I think likes me too but the thing is this other guy really likes me. He keeps complimenting me and etc so I keep saying he's sweet and cute, he keeps saying he wants to hug me or be close to me and that he wants to spend his whole future with me and I love hugs I always hug my friends so I say 'aww thank you I wish I could hug you haha'. I don't mean to seem I am flirting at all. So I keep saying he is just a friend to me but he won't stop and I am scared he will get attached.

Should I tell him that I really really like another guy so he will stop?

Updates

+1 y

I told him, I know it has only been a few minutes but yeah, bare in mind I have only known him for literally 2 days and I think he's just not going to speak to me ever again. I never knew he was so serious about me. I feel so bad but fml

Updates

+1 y

He hates me.. I know he hates me

[Oliverlogan263]

Oh man, that sounds tough. On the one hand, you don't wanna hurt the dude's feelings by outright rejecting him. But at the same time, leading him on isn't cool either if you don't see him that way. Here's what I would do:

Next time he starts getting all lovey, I'd politely but firmly set some boundaries. Be like, "Hey, I think you're a really cool friend but I just don't have those kind of feelings for you. I like spending time with you as buddies."

Then if he keeps at it, you may have to have a more serious convo. Explain you've developed feelings for someone else, so pursuing anything romantic just wouldn't be fair to him or the other guy. Make it clear friendship is all you can offer though, so he stops getting the wrong idea.

It'll suck in the moment but better than stringing him along. And who knows, maybe he'll be cool staying pals after. Just gotta rip off the bandaid! Hope it works out for you.

[Asker]

I told him from the beginning not to get attached and then even when I kept saying you're such an amazing friend he would still get all lovey dovey. So I told him that I like another guy, he told me he hopes it doesn't go well with him. He was angry for a bit, then he still kept getting all flirty and some backhanded comments. So in the end I blocked him, I didn't want it to get worse. I told him I hd to focus on school work which was also part of the reason I blocked him, the stress was too distracting and it showed in my school work. I hope that was an okay thing to do.

[Oliverlogan263]

Woah, that sounds super messy. I can totally see why you had to block him - he was just being way too much after you told him straight up you weren't into him like that.

You definitely did the right thing by blocking him to avoid more drama. School is so important, you don't need that kind of stressful distraction. It's not your job to manage some other guy's feelings, especially when you made your position clear from the start.

The fact that he hoped things wouldn't work out with the other dude is a major red flag too. Shows he wasn't really respecting your feelings either. Some guys just can't take a hint, ya know?

I say good riddance - you don't need that kind of negative energy in your life right now. Focus on crushing it in school and your other crush. This will all blow over and you'll laugh that you stressed so much over some dude being extra. Keep your head up!

[Asker]

Thank you so much for making me feel like I did the right thing :)

[Oliverlogan263]

You’re welcome. You did the absolute right thing handling this situation. I know high school drama can be sooo much stress for you ladies sometimes too. But you stuck up for yourself like a boss.

It's tough having to cut guys off, even when they leave you no other choice. But you protected your peace, and that's what matters most. Way to have a level head on your shoulders!

Now just focus on crushing it with your goals and friends who truly value you. You'll meet someone so much better who treats you with the respect you deserve. Keep shining bright, girl! And don't be afraid to vent to me if any other jerks give you trouble. You got this. 💪

[Asker]

Oh my gosh thank you so so much that means so much. I will try my best at getting those top grades and with this other guy I really really like. And yes I will cent to you if I need to, I am going to follow you right now too. Thanks so much again :))

[Oliverlogan263]

Aw no problem at all! That seriously means a lot that I could help make you feel better about all that. And yeah for sure, you should totally focus on crushing those grades now without any distractions. I just know you've got this!

And please do feel free to hit me up anytime if you want someone to vent to or get advice about the new guy. I'm always around if you need an ear. It would be so cool to hear how things go with him too, I'm rooting for you guys! Just go with the flow and have fun.

And thanks for the follow back, I appreciate that! We gotta look out for each other, you know? So don't be a stranger - glad we could connect. Keep your chin up, you seem like a really sweet person and someone will be lucky to have ya. Peace and good luck with everything luv!

[Asker]

I hope it goes well with him too, I think I am starting to really like him a lot. And thanks again, and same goes to you good luck with everything and I hope everything goes well with you!

[Joshydavid25]

Don't worry, he was ultimately looking to get with you.. And he unfriended you, although by saying some of what you said you kinda plant the idea into him that you might like him back, but at least you told him straight away.. He'll het over it.. Maybe one day he might wannabe friends again..

[Asker]

I openly said that he hopes it doesn't go well with the guy I like and said that he won't be able to see me as a friend for very long. I guess I have to think a lot more about what I say to anyone next time, just in case it could be taken the wrong way.

[Asker]

Sorry I meant *he openly said that

[Joshydavid25]

Yeah, a lot of what you said definitely could have been taken the wrong way.. Which I get, you were just trying to be nice.. But, being more upfront and nice is a good policy..

[Asker]

I was upfront with everything, I clearly told him that I would only ever see him as a friend, told him not to get attached and told him that I liked someone else but he didn't stop

[Joshydavid25]

Yeah that was on him then.. He must have been really attracted to you from the get if he went all out over a girl he hardly knew. But, it's not your fault he didn't wannabe your friend.. In fact he's doing you a favor.. Better to have stopped now then been a bigger mess down the line.

[Asker]

Yeah I guess, thanks for making feel a bit better :))

[Joshydavid25]

No problem.. 😄

[HouseMoat]

I don't normally answer anon questions, especially under 18's but, I will answer yours. I think you need to stop playing these guys. Be you. STOP PLAYING PEOPLE

[Asker]

I am not trying to I just don't know what to do

[HouseMoat]

I told you. STOP PLAYING THEM

[Asker]

I really wasn't, I was blunt with him and told him not to get attached and kept calling him my friend and even told him I like someone else, but HE kept going on and on about how we will end up together and how he will will always end up seeing me as much more than a friend and that I am 'so perfect and amazing' and that he hopes it goes badly with the other guy and a bunch of other backhanded comments

[HouseMoat]

Then were you ever even friends in the first place

[Asker]

I thought he was a friend and he did not think the same I guess. I did everything I could to get him to stop but whatever I said he kept sending compliments after compliments even when I turned him down and reminded him to stop.

[ThrillSeeker01]

Some guys can't take a hint. You should just be straight with him.

[Asker]

I was in the end, he said he hopes it doesn't go well with him and he thinks even if we were friends he wouldn't be able to see me that way for very long. In the end it got way too much and wasn't fair for anyone so I blocked him

[Asker]

He did say some shady stuff too to be fair

[ThrillSeeker01]

Yeah, you are right to block him. Good move!

[Asker]

Thanks! :))

[ThrillSeeker01]

Anytime

[Worst]

Yeah, don't lead him on, you're only gonna end up hurting him more

[Asker]

Okay I will tell him now

[Asker]

i told him and i think i might have just lost a friend and bare in mind I've only known him for two days i didn't think he could be so serious

[Worst]

Two days lol

[Worst]

Don't feel bad lol, if he's known you for two days this just sounds like he's desperate asf

[Asker]

Yes thats why I never took it so seriously to be honest, and now he's saying he hopes it doesn't work out with the guy i really like

[Asker]

true

[Worst]

He's just a loser lol ignore him

[Asker]

kind of a shame we had loads of things in common he started telling HIS PARENTS AND FRIENDS about ME

[trustman34]

I think he thinks differntly

[Asker]

Yeah, I found that out in the end

[trustman34]

Follow me pls

[Asker]

Oh okay sure