How disrespectful?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend won't let me check his phone because he says we are not engaged. Everytime I take it, he won't give me the password. One time he gave it to me for a few seconds. Once he saw I was looking into his pictures, he grabbed his phone off my hands. I have asked him a billion of times to unlock his phone, he says he'll do it but he never does it.
Today, we were out for a coffee. I reached and took his phone, and he took mine. He managed to unlock my phone, while I didn't. I asked him to give back my phone but he wouldn't. I told him he doesn't let me see his phone, so I won't let him see mine. But he couldn't care less. He kept on checking through everything I had there despite me asking a billion of times to give it back. Then after some time he gave it to me. I was really angry with him, but he was laughing.

Before, we used to give to each other our phones. I would take his and he would let me, and vice versa. But one day he decided he wouldn't let me see his phone until we got engaged. So he stopped giving me the password!!! Sure he wouldn't stop me from taking it, but he wouldn't give me the password. When he asked for my phone, I would say I'd give it to him only if he gave it to me. But he never did!! So I wouldn't either give mine. And today this happened.

[Jiko-Kaizen]

One of the basic elements to the foundation of any type of relationship is "Trust", if you can't 99.99% trust your partner, the relationshp is doomed for failure, Stop trying to look at your partner's content on his phone, it shows lack of confidence, the same is true if you can't free and willingly allow your partner to view you phone. View not snoop around, snooping is a sign of mistrust.
Believe me, eventually the truth will come to light, all the warning signs are there. Fix the trust or the relationship will eventually dissolve.

[Billlewis]

He obviously has things on his phone that he doesn't want you to see.

[Asker]

Yes!!! Otherwise he wouldn't grab his phone off my hands when he saw me looking through the pics.

[Malwi93]

Yeah obviously...

[HollyK21]

If there is really that little trust in your relationship that you need to randomly check his phone then you do not need to be together, let alone marry into that bullshit.

[IslaTheWitch]

I wouldn't show my phone to anyone who shows me a lack of respect or trust. I don't have any obligation to show anyone, including my boyfriend, my private stuff.

[KrakenAttackin]

What a mess smart phones and social media have created.

[Asker]

👍👍

[Asker]

Totally!!!

[spartan55]

Wow, engaged to be married and you don't trust each other. I give your marriage 2 years tops.

[Asker]

Its not that we dont trust each other, but now he has put me a condition. It's pressure to get me to accept the engagement. What irritates me is his lack of respect he showed today.

[spartan55]

You're going to sit there and claim you trust him when you go through his phone (it sounds like regularly)? That's denial there.

[Asker]

Well I wanna see what he hides.

[spartan55]

Who says he is hiding anything. Just end it. It'll will never work because you will be up his butt questioning him about everything.

[Anonymous]

i don't let anyone check my phone, ever, and i don't expect to check theirs

either you trust someone or you don't

[ChicoFromThe305]

I think you know the best decision here, hopefully you make that the final decision.

[BourbonAndBacon]

Sorry to tell you this but its not going to work with a guy like that. But I think you already know that

[Asker]

I know!!! I know!!!

[LiamJHayden]

You clearly do not trust him. Just break up.

[Asker]

I guess that would be the right decision. Although its not that I distrust him. He disrespects me.

[pickles77]

It kind of sounds like he doesn’t plan to get married unless he’s hiding something good like a surprise but that doesn’t seem to be the vibe

[HelpfulWoman]

you sound a bit of a controlling nut.

[Asker]

Do I? Thats not really my intention.