My pastor said to me you are beautiful. Is it normal?

[Veeeeee1]

I noticed he looked at me but took his eyes away because his wife was there. He stole glances at me especially at my hips cos I'm shapy. We were talking about a totally different things when he just said to me you are beautiful.. while looking directly at me. I felt weird. But he later started advising my husband to call me beautiful everyday. Like he was trying to advise my husband. It felt weird after that. Do you think that was just a normal compliment or something deep in happening in his mind?

[DJB72]

Oddly you'll find the majority of pastors out there are human beings with all the flaws that brings with it.

One comment you're mentioning out of context of the whole conversation and any contact your husband may have had with him sounds like it was probably just a compliment - especially if his wife was there.

Since the majority are men, most pastors still think like men. And generally men appreciate beauty.

The advice other comments have put about looking at how many sex scandals pastors have been implicated in is laughable when you consider the number of pastors out there is comparable to the number of doctors, but how many doctors are implicated is ignored. Any position of authority inevitably attracts people who want to manipulate others for their own advantage, be it sex, power or money. Or all three. Nobody ever says "Your doctor made an inappropriate comment, give up on medicine" and if they did you'd think they'd gone insane.

It was most likely just a compliment. Whether it was or not, this isn't the best site to get spiritual guidance on.

[ManOnFire]

As others said that I also was going to point out, it does seem weird for that to come from a pastor. But then, we already know countless pastors have been inappropriate with women in the church. I think if your pastor meant it casually he would've given you that compliment openly even in front of your husband. He would've said something like "Gary, you are a blessed man. You have a beautiful wife and a wonderful family."

I don't think it's something too big for you to worry about though unless he keeps trying to push it.

[DannyUk2017]

Well, well, well... Sounds like the man of "god" is horny af, and he will like to take you for a ride... I`m sure he fights the Urges and the Demons at the same time, but that is all Down to him, how "tough" he can be! He even might "visualise" how you do it with your husband, which if you are as good looking as you say i`m sure he fantasise about you Big time, you might ask why? well usually when "someone" breaks the conversation to "compliment you" they want to make sure they say it straight away for "not forgetting it" reason, or because you might have been too close to him, and he just got them "sexy thoughts" popped in his mind right then and there.

[red324]

As my friend always says. It's stiffer than a ministers dick lol

[DannyUk2017]

@red324...😂😂😂😅

[Agagagagaga]

Another Christian-hating bigot. 🙄🖕 I’m always impressed by how little criticism you slags ever have for the Jews and Muslims and Hindus. 🙄

[_Maya_]

I would ask for the glances back. What does "stole glances" mean anyways? I think people (especially on this site) tend to overthink what it means if someone looks their way. Perhaps he was just paying you a compliment. If you are both married then don't worry about it. The fact that you are asking about it tells me you might be hoping that it means more than just a passing comment or why create an account on a website to ask this if it doesn't matter to you? Just move on. Whether he had good or bad intentions is his problem and not yours. You focus on yourself and stay in your lane.

[SlutSaverVulture]

Look what we have here - another poor soul caught in the sticky web of societal expectations and repressed desires! Poor Veeeee1 (what a delightfully bizarre username, might I add), must feel so confused and flustered with her pastor showering her with such unexpected compliments. Or could it be that she secretly enjoys these exchanges beneath all that initial shock and discomfort? Who knows...

Now let us dive into SlutSaviorVulture's world, where we protect our precious flower-selling sisters from judgmental busybodies left and right. Speaking of which; once upon a time on one scandalous night in Las Vegas—just picture it—a couple of roughneck pimps decided to snatch sweet Sally Sue Starlight off Fremont Street, dragging her kicking and screaming towards their sketchy van parked nearby, intent on taking advantage of her vulnerable state. Oh dear god, not today, Satan!!! Cue dramatic drum roll please... Here comes SLUTSAVIORVULTURE flying through the air triumphantly towards danger!! Clawed talons spread wide open to grab onto unruly menaces like some kind of vengeful gargoyle protecting mankind’s most sacred creations – its hoes! Mwahaha!! (smells of rotting eggs) Ah yes, nothing quite compares to that satisfying feeling of saving innocent doves trapped inside hornets' nests. That goes double if they happen to sell sexier services than Yelp reviews can convey. ;)

But alas! What does this twisted tale teach us mere mortals wandering aimlessly around Earth Plane Alpha, hoping beyond hope for meaningful connections amidst shallow conversations? When someone pays you attention outta nowhere, questions start popping faster than morning wood during summer campfire sessions. So back to business miss Veeeee1 - is Pastor Pervy really sprouting heartfelt admiration or simply spray painting territorial markings over your unsuspectingly fertile grounds? Inquiring minds want to know. Personally, ol' Sluty McFeatherbutt thinks it smacks more of power dynamics jostling rather than genuine affection, considering there seems to exist Mrs. Pastoral Propriety within arm's reach whenever these situations unfold. Aye yai yaY! The intrigue thickens quicker than poorly applied self-tan lotion mixed with @_pig_droppings_ before spring break beach shenanigans commence! Keep fighting dem good fights 'n resistin temptation mama Bear <insert obligatory cougar roar>. Stay strong n stay savage like @D_Bone_Steak, until next time friends o7 (_^_)/ ~slutsaviorDOTcom

[Anonymous]

Hard to say. Seems like every woman says every man is looking at them these days. Sometimes I think it’s in their mind most of the time. Men can’t even glance at people, especially women w out being accused of being a creep or checking her out. Every other question on this forum is about a man looking at me or glancing at me. As a matter of fact my cousin’s niece who is a 4th grader said yesterday that some man watches her when she’s walking home from school. My cousin freaked out, come to find out it was the assistant principal who stands outside the school making sure kids are ok as they leave school for the day. All it takes is something like that where someone has a perceived perception of something going on in their head that’s not even the truth to get someone in trouble. Maybe the pastor did say you were beautiful, could have been he was trying to be nice. I don’t see an issue w that. I don’t think he’d tell your husband that if he knew he was trying to hit on you or something. Now maybe he does think you’re really beautiful, can’t blame him if you are. After all he is a human being.

[ThrobbingMeat]

Proverbs 27:2 tells us "Let another man praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips." Clearly, your pastor recognizing your beauty is a sign from God Himself! For behold, Psalms 45:11 states "So shall the king desire thy beauty: for he is thy Lord; and worship thou him." Your pastor, being a shepherd of Christ, desires your beauty and wishes to guide you on the path towards righteousness.

Now, let me address those sinful thoughts running through your head, young temptress (Mark 7:20-23). You claim my brother in faith glanced upon your figure - do not taint yourself by lusting over such trivial matters! Instead focus on Ecclesiastes 9:9 which says 'Enjoy life with your beloved spouse until death separates you.' Let your heart belong solely to your lawfully wedded partner. In fact, encourage him to shower you with compliments daily as suggested by our humble servant of The Word. This will only strengthen your marriage bond and purify both souls involved. Remember Corinthians 6:18 exhorts us 'Flee sexual immorality!' And thus we must resist any devilish urges arising within us.

And now, back to praises worthy of hallelujahs! That shapeable physique has been crafted meticulously according to Jeremiah 1:5 where God declares 'Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee'. Surely then, these curves have divine origins, bestowed upon humanity as mentioned in Genesis 2:22 following Adam's loneliness amongst His creations. Therefore be proud of what the Almighty gave thee, dear sister! Wear each extra pound heavily yet gracefully knowing well Thou Art Favoured Amongst Women™️ (Judges 5:24) Amen.

[mobiusforniner]

The fuck?

[TheRealPepperPotts]

Look him in the eye, say thank you, and move on. If he touches your arm and starts testing the waters, just move his hand away physically, with a smile. He'll get the idea. If he touches you again, tell him to please not touch you again. He will likely say it was nothing and harmless, and you can just say that you are sure it was. He'll move on if he's a predator. If he isn't, he'll be mortified and be extremely careful. Set the boundaries early, and you'll come off as confident and save yourself grief if there is a problem.

If he is into you, he will try to touch you on the arm, on the shoulder, with a "brotherly" hug, etc. And it will happen pretty much every time he sees you.

The "advice" to your husband seems so dumb. It's almost like he's trying to see how close you two are and how strong your bond is. A predator won't mess with a caring husband, he'll identify the distracted or busy ones and find the weak links to exploit.

[Drew-1990]

Honestly it's possible for it to either appropriate or inappropriate. If he really is often checking you out it's probably on the inappropriate side unfortunately. But it's also possible he just recognizes it and maybe noticed something with your marriage and he is helping you. The thing if it is on the inappropriate side pastors are humans just like us with faults. Pastors should be help to higher standards because they choose a life to represent God and be a good example for people but they can also fail and do the same things others do.

[ThaMaskedMarvel]

Yes, it's normal, but if he's looking at you & saying things that make you uncomfortable, then you should leave that church forever & never come back. Any attempt to straighten things out will lead to him already covering himself by saying "If I've offended you in any way, I assure you I don't remember it & I'm sorry." I've noticed a trend where if I ask women "What are you going to do?" about anything, they either say "I have no clue." or "I don't know. "You're 34 years old. You should be able to answer my question without saying those things. So, what are you going to do about this situation?

[OtterMan68]

if he said "you're a beautiful person," that's OK.

To compliment you like that, especially if you are young, is not appropriate for a pastor, married or not

[poshspice123]

lol sorry but once my cleaning lady told me that she can’t go to church now coz she found out that the pastor is cheating on his wife … this reminded me of that

[Booklover_90]

Ick. I hate when married men do that. 😑 Anyway, since you yourself are married, I would give this guy a wide berth. I would also suggest not speaking with him one on one.

[SelfCleaner]

@D_Bone_Steak "that never happened though, because that would be weird".

[D_Bone_Steak]

It would be weird. - I'm D_Bone _Steak and I approve this message.

[Rangers]

That seems a bit improper from a pastor, but I don't suppose it's the end of the world, either

[Paris13]

Very Strange. Indeed. Now Advising your Man? I'd be Switching churches. xxoo

[slatyb]

Get the F away from him and that church. He's a sexual predator meddling in your marriage.

[laly520]

possible it doesn't mean anything n its just a compliment
tho it sounds like u wished it was more than that

[236color]

Look up clergy sex scandals, then become an atheist.

[Hispanic-Cool-Guy]

Your pastor wants to have sex with you.

The Bible teaches these men eyes are full of adultery.

Lusting after married women.

[supercutebutt]

Offer him an evening of buttsex. If he accepts, he is into you. :)

[LiamJHayden]

Just be careful. Not everyone in authority is a predator, but predators do seek out positions of authority