Girls do u think crying as a man in not masculine? when did we start this sexual stereotype?

[overthinkergirl]

me personally i thik crying as a man is totally ok and sth that should be accepted by public

[SotiCoto]

You're giving your entire gender too much credit.

Crying is how infants communicate. It is crude and unpleasant. It is completely uncontrolled.

For centuries men have learnt that being an adult means learning self-control. It means training yourself to perform perfectly in dangerous circumstances and not doing things that could put yourself or your allies at risk. That is centuries if not millennia of conditioning against crying because you could absolutely fucking die AND get your allies killed if you do it at the wrong time.

Women don't have that. Women have centuries of conditioning for manipulating people in social contexts. Contexts where showing weakness can be used as bait to prompt men to protect you... which isn't all that different to what infants do, but is more deliberate.

In any case... crying is infantile. Sometimes it can't be helped, but that doesn't mean it is simply fine to let go and lose control. That is a fundamental failure at being an adult and dealing with your problems in a sensible manner.

[ManInChains]

I think crying as a man is a double edged sword. Yes, it’s heathy to cry and people in general should do it because it’ll make them feel better. At the same time however, a man crying shows vulnerability and even though women encourage men to cry they also don’t find it attractive in men. They want a man who is strong enough to do the things she as a woman can’t do like protect the home from home invaders who may have a gun or a knife. A man who cowers and cries out of fear of having to do something he doesn’t want to do is going to make him look weak and the woman uninterested and turned off. So I guess men just have to decide whether they care more about themselves enough to cry or care more about women enough not to cry.

[overthinkergirl]

well that’s good point of view! however i think that crying is not unattractive - i’d be glad if a man cried on my shoulder because that would make me feel like he trust me enough. and i wouldn’t see it as a weak thong because eveyone has hard time sometimes

[ManInChains]

Men are expected to go through hard times because were men. Women even expect this out of men even if they don’t want to believe it. It’s in their nature. I cried in front of two different girlfriends just to have them cheat on me. One of them even cheated on me with a girl! And at the time when I was crying in front of them they both did what you said you would do and did their best to comfort me but that didn’t change the fact that they inevitably cheated most likely because they wanted someone who cared enough about her not to cry

[overthinkergirl]

that’s tough that they both cheated on u. u know that u deserve better that that and that u’ll find a girl who will be good enough and who will not make u feel like shit. because women and men are different and we can throw them in the same basket.

[ManInChains]

Thanks but I’d rather not find a girl good enough for me. After everything I’ve been through in the past before giving up on relationships, women and dating a potential partner would just be absolutely miserable and only end up cheating on me like the rest did. Besides I’m much happier alone I was too unhappy in my past relationships and I can’t see myself being happy in another in the future. It’s the reason why I got a cat in the first place. Companionship I don’t need from a woman.

[overthinkergirl]

that do your thing if u feel happier like this✨

[DishLady]

As far as I know every little boy from about age seven is told “big boys don’t cry” for anything from a skinned knee after falling off a bike to a black eye from the school bully. The design, I imagine, was to toughen the “crybabies” up to “be men” … Does it work? Hmm…


Sometimes the social conditioning leads to a guy becoming completely insensitive, emotionally awkward, etc. Other times it leads to that whole stoic vibe that’s suddenly becoming so popular again. I don't know why… perhaps it’s just easier than it is to feel and experience things deeply. 🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

[Alice18]

Personally, I think that boys who cry are very cute. Men's tears are real courage. Firstly, they are less emotional, so if they cry, something really difficult has happened, and secondly, a person is not afraid to do it, despite the fact that he was taught to suppress emotions from childhood.

[overthinkergirl]

i agree100%☺️

[Billlewis]

Oh my goodness... really? That is so awesome;). I just started following you and I'd like to invite you to follow me, as well, if that's alright. Thank you very much.

[mandyfire98]

No and most women aren't the one's calling men things like gay or pussies for crying. It's other men who say that. That's what us called toxic masculinity. When men call out other men for not being tough enough or needing to "man up". It's bullshit and harmful.

[overthinkergirl]

agreed100%

[Abhishek4444]

I am Abhishek a 21 years old single, virgin and unmarried boy from Maharashtra state of India and my parents say boys don't cry they say are you girl to cry I think that's the reason the suicide rate of boys and men is four times higher as compared to girls and women suicide rate sometimes I also think I should die as I don't want to marry but still my parents forcing me to marry when I will be 30 years old when I say no I don't want to marry and reproduce they say that what would the society say I agree that the society will not let me and my parents breathe oxygen peacefully if I don't marry but still I think marriage and children is like a torture I wish I was never born I wish I was a neem tree as it gives the highest amount of oxygen as compared to other trees in this world

[overthinkergirl]

yeap i know that suicide is much higher with guys. maybe save up enough money so u can move out from your parents and u start living on your own and make your own desicions (and not harm anyone with them)

[Abhishek4444]

yes but it's too difficult for me to do so as living alone is not easy

[Ms_Facesitter]

I see no difference about crying. If you want to cry do it. But there are some things that are so meaningless that you shouldn't cry about, yet some still do.
I am speaking about both men and women.
That toddler crying because they didn't get a toy at the supermarket. There are adult versions of that.

[The_Sexpert]

I think the stereotype is good upto a certain extent
It discourages men from crying over silly things.. that's why when you see a man cry , you know it must be something terrible like death of a parent for example
Plus , as much as we criticize masculinity, everyone looks upto masculine figures when there's a crisis.. so they have to stay strong and not break down

[OtterMan68]

I don't know:

In Homer's Odyessey, Odyesseus wept when he reunited with his wife.

"Jesus wept."

Peter wept when he realized he had denied Jesus.

According to Trump, male politicians have often come to him with tears in their eyes begging him for his endorsement.

[Berethor]

I heard that England in the 19th century has made the men don't cry trope popular. :)

https://allthetropes.org/wiki/Men_Don%27t_Cry

[wiltingrosepetal]

My parents raised my brother well. He's a muscular, 6'3, conservative guy, but he lets the tears flow when something really upsets him. All men deserve that same freedom

[IslaTheWitch]

nope

tears are effect of emotions... sometimes good, sometimes bad...

[CrabCakes11]

Crying is a healthy behavior and men shouldn’t be penalized for it

[jahaims]

The stereotype comes from females treating a male different after he was vulnerable

[NYlatefun]

I don’t think that’s a sexual stereotype, it’s a gender stereotype if anything and it’s ok for men to cry.

[Anonymous]

It depends. Shedding a tear in public is okay because men have emotions too. But outright crying in public would be a little cringy.