I need thoughts and opinions. Flirting or not flirting? interested in something or not?

[Anonymous]

We’re close in age & worked together almost a year. Things have always been friendly and cordial between us, just casual convos and smiles in passing. out of nowhere he’s extra chatty and hanging around more, & seems to be laughing hard at my jokes. He would subtly talk himself up & show off a bit. The next I saw him after that he wasn’t even looking in my direction so I chat with him first just to see and he gets all smiley with me & starts eyeing me playfully and flirtatiously on the dl, but making sure I see him. if he wasn’t flirting or putting something out there for me to pick up, I don’t think he would’ve started with the looks/eyes. This has never been the vibe between us so I don't know what changed.

I call him out for the flirting and he backs off for months to follow. I just asked if he had been flirting rather than just asking him out or flirting back & he immediately denies it and plays it off, asking if he’s being too friendly (so he was aware his behavior was different) and in defense mode I say “yeah a little.” He then says he’s just there to have a good time. He then months later, starts being chatty again which I don’t think too hard about until he points out a stray hair on my hat and brushes it off for me around other higher ups. I really wouldn’t think too much about it now but I feel like I should know better knowing how he’s been in the past with me.

Updates

+1 y

They don’t work on the same level as I do

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm that does sound kinda confusing! On the one hand, it seems like his behavior changed towards you in a flirty way. Smiling more, laughing at your jokes, finding excuses to touch you lightly like brushing off your hair. That gives off romantic interest vibes for sure.

But then when you directly called him out on it, he backed off and denied anything was going on. Guys can be kinda awkward about admitting feelings sometimes. And if you guys work together, maybe he was scared to officially make a move.

I'd say trust your gut - it sounds like there could be something there on his end, even if he won't fully own up to it. The lingering looks and increased close contact are promising signs.

If you're feeling it too, maybe subtly flirt back a little and see how he responds before making any bold moves yourself. Read the room first. Or you could straight up ask him to hang out so there's no confusion about intentions.

Either way, just proceed cautiously since it's a work situation. But it does seem like there could potentially be more to explore between you two!

[spartan55]

So he's not allowed to flirt with you?

[spartan55]

"they don't work on the same level as I do"
Okay... they who? What does this have to do with anything?