Is it worth re starting a friendship, in hopes to reconnect and start again or should I fully move on?

[elsbels95]

I used to work at a pub and me and a manager had been flirting on and off for 7 months and when it had gotten to the point where I thought something was going to happen he then got back with his ex. During the time he was with his ex we both stopped flirting, however he did keep asking how my dating life was going, but as he was with his ex i just assumed he was asking as this was something we’d talked about previously when were both single.

However him and his ex ended up breaking up and shortly after they did, and i had left the pub, he liked me hinge. After a few days we hooked up, and i went round his, however after we had slept together he did then kick me out right after as he flat mate was coming back. I assumed that it was a one time thing due to this and when i did see him next (after a few days) i have to admit i was a bit cold and didn't really talk/engage to with him, whilst he was his normal friendly self and kept trying to catch my eye. This did confuse me so i messaged him after this just asking why he hadn't messaged since our hookup and he said that he was ‘in his head’ about it and wasn't in the right place for a causal thing at the moment. As i couldnt really do a super casual just sex thing we agreed to leave it and just be friends.

However I then didn't see him for about 3 months at all, and when i did see him randomly again recently I did smile and wave to say Hi as i was walking past but didn't stop to chat as he was with a group of people and i was meeting a friend.

since this i have seen him a few times, he doesn't seem to want to look at me and when we are with our mutal friends and doesn't speak to me. I am always friendly and smiley and would like to try and start a conversation but do still get nervous al, especially now since he wants nothing to do with me.
I would like to re connect our friendship as we were good friends, but i when i am around him, he acts like he doesn't want to talk to me/look at me

What should i do?

[Oliverlogan263]

Here's what I would suggest:

It seems like there's still some unresolved feelings and awkwardness left over from your past romantic/sexual history with this guy. Rebuilding a proper friendship will likely be challenging given all that subtext still lingering. A few thoughts:

- Give it more time and distance before attempting to reconnect fully. Sometimes that initial post-breakup weirdness needs to fade more.

- If you do want to try, keep it super casual and low pressure. Something simple like saying hi in passing to gauge his comfort level.

- Don't get your hopes up that you'll be super close friends right away. It may take a while to get comfortable again without romantic expectations.

- Be prepared that he may still need space. If he seems reluctant to engage, don't push it. That could backfire.

- Make sure YOU are really over any past feelings too. You don't want to unintentionally send mixed signals if your motives aren't just friendly.

- Start fresh and keep conversations light, like catching up on surface stuff versus dwelling on the past.

Overall I'd say try easing back into acquaintance-level interactions for now, and see how it develops over time. Go slow and don't force it. With patience a real friendship could potentially rekindle, but only if you both want that with clear intentions.

[spartan55]

Let it go. Get the idea of you and him being 'friends' out of your head. No guy wants to be your friend.

[WhitneySnow]

He doesn’t want to be friends and he definitely doesn’t want a relationship. For him it was just a one and done hookup.

[MacDaddyRico]

Run in the opposite direction and never look back.
You get what you deserve flirting with a co-worker... and a fucking manager at that!
How stupid can people be?

[CubaPirate]

Let sleeping dogs lie. Time to move on you know you deserve better

[Pterodon]

Move on