Guys, how should I handle the situation if the guy I've been talking to online has recently become very quiet and hasn't been messaging me?

[Anonymous]

I've been talking to this guy online who started flirting with me. At first, I wasn't convinced because of his behavior and I wasn't interested in a relationship. However, over time, I began to enjoy our conversations and we've developed a close relationship over the past two months.

He's 11 years younger than me, but we find each other attractive and enjoy sharing all kinds of conversations. When I asked him about his true intentions, he told me that he really likes me and wants to be a good friend, but he's currently afraid of love due to his past relationship, which I understand.

He usually initiates conversations, but sometimes I do too. Lately, he's been very quiet and hasn’t messaged me, which makes me feel anxious. I feel the urge to ask if everything is okay, but I’m hesitant because I don't want to seem too clingy and I want him to feel comfortable.

What do you think about his behavior? Should I reach out if he doesn’t say anything, or should I give him space? I miss him.

[Summeroflove]

I think it’s completely reasonable to ask if everything is okay it’s not normal to just stop talking to someone. At the very least if he’s not interested in even being friends you have closure.

Just do remember that you expressed interest and he did turn it down so the balls in his court if he wants anything else. I would look for a relationship form someone else.

[Asker]

I absolutely agree with you. I felt anxious because It's not normal for him to take so many hours to reply to my messages. He often says that he has a busy schedule because he studies and Works. However, I can't help but feeling anxiety, but Perhaps due to previous trauma experiences.

[Summeroflove]

Yeah asker if he’s genuinely busy give him some time if what you’re saying isn’t important. But if he’s talking to other people or you know he’s active that may be another story.

Now at the same time nobody has to spend their entire free time talking to someone. But it’s nice when someone closes a conversation not just leaving someone hanging. That’s frustrating

[Asker]

Yes, I understand what you mean. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I really appreciate it.

[Summeroflove]

You’re welcome! I would also just talk about how you feel and your concerns in a nice and respectful way and listen to him as welll. That’s what keeps communication going

[molonski2]

Ohh hell no , he is FAR too young for you , wholly sht does he need a mother? It sounds like it , men need to take responsibly.. Look as harsh as it sounds , sanity has prevailed and he has found a hot babe younger than himself , just leave it alone you dont want to become a mother figure to a boy..

Leave it be , its not remotely healthy for you.

[Asker]

I understand your opinion, but for me, age difference isn’t an issue, especially when two people genuinely care for each other, share a deep connection, and have similar goals. There are many examples out there where age differences have worked out well. The important thing is to understand each other and, over time, build a strong identity together if both continue to share those feelings.

[thearchjoker]

It could be because he's a 19 year old with a 30 year old.

[Asker]

He's 23 and I'm 34

[jahaims]

Let him know you are thinking about him, miss talking to him and hope he is doing well.

[Asker]

Thank you for your feedback. I was planning to do it later, but before I could, he messaged me asking how I was.

[slatyb]

You should look for someone local.

[Asker]

Well, he's not local, and I want to figure things out with him and not anyone else.