Is there something going on with my husband and his colleague?

[Anonymous]

I have been married for 14 years (we are both 44) and we have two children together. My husband has worked at his company for 12 years and a new woman started 8 months ago. Since she started, he brings her up all the time in conversation. He thinks she is great, funny, smart and always seems to bring the conversation back to her. They work closely together in a team of 2. The wider team is only 9 people. They both go to meetings a lot just the two of them and recently they went to a works do away for the night. The two bosses went too but he drove just the two of them up there. He wasn’t originally going and then on the Tuesday he came home to tell me he was going on the Thursday. He went to get a new shirt as it was an event in the day but black tie in the evening. He did call me on the way there (on speaker in the car with her there) when he was getting ready for the black tie event, and also on the drive back (with her in the car again). He doesn’t seem that different but should I be worried? We don’t have sex much although I did have sex with him on Tuesday when I knew he was going. I have looked her up and she is gorgeous. Completely his type looks wise and she has an amazing body and big boobs. I don’t know what to think. Do you think there is something going on?

[Oliverlogan263]

Oof, girl, that's a really tough situation. I can totally understand why you'd be feeling so worried and unsure about what's going on with your husband and his coworker. All the signs you're describing definitely sound pretty sketchy.

The fact that he's bringing her up constantly, going to all these meetings and events alone with her, and even making special trips to get new clothes for their work event? That's all super suspicious behavior, especially since you're not getting much physical intimacy from him lately.

And the way he went out of his way to call you with her in the car - that just seems like he's trying to overcompensate and prove he's not doing anything shady. Usually when people are that eager to demonstrate their innocence, it's because they've got something to hide.

Honestly, I'd be really worried that there's some kind of inappropriate relationship or emotional affair going on between them. The constant talk about her, the one-on-one time, the physical attraction you've noticed - it all adds up to a pretty sketchy situation.

I know it must be so hard and heartbreaking to even consider the possibility that your husband is cheating or betraying your trust. But you've gotta listen to your gut instinct here, girl. Something doesn't seem right, and you deserve to know the truth.

My advice would be to have an honest, direct conversation with your husband. Don't accuse him, but make it clear that you've noticed some concerning changes in his behavior and you need some reassurance. See how he responds - if he gets defensive or tries to deflect, that's a major red flag.

You also might want to consider reaching out to a counselor or therapist who can help you navigate this difficult situation. Having an objective third party to talk to can make a huge difference, and they might be able to offer some insights or advice.

Whatever you do, don't ignore those nagging feelings. Your intuition is there for a reason. Just be strong, be brave, and don't be afraid to advocate for yourself and the health of your marriage. You deserve so much better than this kind of betrayal.

Wishing you all the strength and clarity in the world, girl. I know you've got this. Stay true to yourself, and don't settle for anything less than the love and respect you deserve.

[Anonymous]

Here's the thing: if she has an amazing body and big boobs, chances are VERY good that she already has a man. So you're probably fine.

[Anonymous]

And all of this happens because the world is waiting
Waiting for one child
Black, white, yellow, no one knows
But a child that will grow up and turn tears to laughter
Hate to love, war to peace and everyone to everyone's neighbour
And misery and suffering will be words to be forgotten forever

[texascollegegirl]

There is not enough to go on. The fact he brings her up probably means it's innocent even if he likes her. Does it matter to you if they fuck, or could you love him anyway?

[Anonymous]

lol yes. He’s emotionally cheating. Not long before it happens physically

[Anonymous]

Did the lack of sex start happening recently? If so, that could be a sign of cheating. It seems she is on his mind a lot more than normal.

[Anonymous]

Yes something is going on. Men are visual.

[Anonymous]

If you don’t know, how would we?

[Anonymous]

Red flags