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So I have this coworker he's a rather timid man and doesn't speak much unless you specifically ask him a question typically.
I wouldn't call him unfriendly or anything personally I like him and like hearing what he has to say. So I probably bother him a bit to much 😅 just to be clear I like him in a platonic way not a romantic way. And I'm married so I'm sure he knows that.
He stated last week that he doesn't have any friends just as a off handed comment that he probably forgot he told me.
I was thinking about inviting him to go do something and would like to be his friend but I honestly don't know if he wants a friend he might just be politely tolerating my bullshit and just doesn't want to tell me to fuck off and leave him alone
So what do you think should I ask him to hangout or no?
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
1Opinion
"I'm married and I'm sure he knows that"... uh... how would he know that? What does your husband think of your idea?
He would know that
1. The ring
2. Me talking about my husband almost every day
3. He's met my husband
4. Work's with my husband from time to time
My husband doesn't really care what I do honestly he knows damn good and well I'm not a cheater and if nothing else my anxiety alone wouldn't allow it been together 7 years and I still am uncomfortable with him seeing me naked.
But I'm pretty sure I'm not my coworkers type to begin with so I don't think there's anything to worry about lol
Guys don't notice rings very often. Bad idea, but do what you want.
Also, guys typically don't have types.
Well even if he didn't notice the ring I didn't state directly to him that I was married. But me being married wasn't the concern I had about asking him to hangout.
It was that he might not want to and then making work awkward. It's not like you have to want to have sex with someone to be friends.
Why would a guy want to be friends with a married woman?
If he doesn't want to I don't understand why it make it awkward at work. It's only 'friends' right?
Most of my friends are men so I don't see the problem I tend to just do different stuff I'm interested in with them for instance Ian I talk about farm stuff with because we both like homesteading Branden and I do ceramics because we both like throwing on the wheel and trade different techniques.
Randy likes to talk about history with me. What's wrong with having a platonic friend?
And it makes a little awkward because it would kinda imply that he doesn't really like talking to me and that I'm just bothering him. Don't get me wrong id be fine id just try to pester him less if that was the case.
There is nothing wrong with platonic friends, but when you are married things can get a bit complicated. Having mostly guy friends is a red 🚩flag for most guys.
To be fair most of his friends are women but finding female friends who like the things I like is difficult I mean I have a couple but it's hard to come by like for instance I like to play d&d do you know how hard it is to find women willing to play DND
Yeah, I get that. Do you share any hobbies with your husband?
I'm also not really the kind of girl men fall for lesbians yes men no most of my husbands friends have told him they are going to steal me because id be better in their bed then his.
Wait what? That's pretty fucked up.
Oh there's a god damn line of women who have told my husband they are going to "steal me" share me or call dibs when he dies or kidnap me. Like a list of 11 or so women.
Men couldn't give less of a fuck about my existence but women act like I was dusted in ecstasy. .
I'm not really most mens cup of tea I'm a brawny woman who's stronger than the average man so men arnt exactly lining up at My door but lesbians a woman who I strong can sweep them off there feet compliments them and can fix about anything with some elbow grease and a bit of cursing. They are all over my ass.
Well, this is a new one.
It really doesn't help that I can't dance the girls roll but I can spin you around dip you can even do the lift if you have the core strength. My husband thinks it's funny to have me pick him up because he's 250 pounds because he likes seeing peoples face when I Carry him around. My roommate is 300 pounds and I can pick her up on my hips like they do in the movie's.
Not to many men want to fuck around with a woman who could knock them on their ass
I have been called a false fruit so many times that I was given a T-shirt of it the back says don't fall for it I look like I'm fruity walk like I'm fruity smell like I'm fruity but I'm not fruity
Don't shit where you eat!
Ask him
I'm just worried that maybe he doesn't want a friend and I'm going to make him uncomfortable or make work awkward we are on the same team
I think he’ll be cool with it. Just be careful he doesn’t start crushing on you.
Oh I'm sure that won't happen I'm not exactly the kind of girl people crush on get advice on someone else sure but actually attracted to not really.
But I do enjoy his company even if he is a bit awkward and hard to read.
Ill need to find something to ask him to though. I was thinking maybe some kind of book event I know he likes to read.
Good idea!
Now I got to find a book event lol I know he also likes to hike but I don't think I'd be able to keep up with him lol and I know my knees would bother him.
He mentioned that anything having to do with knee injuries make him squeamish because dislocated his knee at one point and my knees go back a little to far when I straighten them ( kinda like double jointed in my knee's)
So I feel like the books is the safest bet considering I know he's also a pretty picky eater
That’s a good idea