Is he lying to me?

[Frankie9]

The other day my partner went to the bathroom to shower and get ready for work as always. My son who was upstairs said he felt sick and needed the bathroom. My partner was in there and I became aware that he didn't turn the shower on for a good 15 minutes. I eventually messaged him and said 'what are you doing, bashing one out, son feels sick'. I don't care if he actually was but i was a bit annoyed just due to the circumstances of needing the bathroom, plus I have a baby that was needing feeding etc while I was with my son. My partner has a watch that messages go to and he had his phone. When he came down he seemed a bit avoidant and left. His phone said he opened the message at around 8am shown by the blue ticks but feel he would have read it before that. I was just expecting something along the lines of 'oh shut up, what's up with son' or along those lines but he just completely ignored me all day which we don't do unless we have an argument-which is never about this. About 7 hours later I messaged him again and said 'take that as a yes then lol, followed by info he needed for the vet". He replied of course yea couldn't be anything else could it, nothing I love more than banging one out before a day working with the boys' (colleagues). He then just said he was on eBay and sent me a screenshot of an order. I said I was a little confused as to why I'd been ignored all day and said I didn't get why it would take 15 minutes to buy a universal remote but ok. It's a busy house of 6 so the bathroom is always needed in the morning anyway! I want to highlight I don't care if he doing this in there- but I really feel like he's lying about it and the lying is annoying me. He seemed to be really defensive and annoyed. I dont really understand why he wouldn't have just said 'no I was shopping on eBay what's up with son' in the first place. And I don't understand why I was just ignored for the entire day. I said it was weird to be ignored and he just ignored that too

[ManOnFire]

I am puzzled by this as well. I read all your details and tried to figure this out and coming up with nothing. Something got him upset, but I can't see why you telling him he must be banging on out would do it. No idea what that is about at all.

[Nikki1989]

If he is your typical male, there is an 80% chance he is indeed lying. Hard to tell just from reading this, though. The biggest red flags here are the avoidance and the defensiveness, not the content of the message. You are dealing with a problem of emotional integrity, not personal downtime.

[elizamichale1]

Seems as if you are trying to annoy him n really really push him away

[Frankie9]

I definitely wasnt-we have not long had a baby together and he has in the past said similar to me. Example being 'can i come to bed yet or are you having some alone time' it's just something occasionally we have said over the years without much thought. I'm just confused by the behaviour over the idea of the act.

[elizamichale1]

Well... I dont really know what to say... but i really really hope things get sorted for u honey

[Frankie9]

Thank you. It is just the behaviour afterwards I find really bizarre and can't work out more than what it was

[elizamichale1]

Well hopefully it gets better

[elizamichale1]

Thanks for the mho honey

[slatyb]

He was texting another woman, or looking at porn, or some other activity you wouldn't like. I would bet on the first one -- texting another woman.

[Frankie9]

I really don't think he would have been texting someone else. Porn maybe I guess. It is the behaviours I'm annoyed by. The gut feeling of lying. Doesn't really matter what it's about. I just don't know if I'm over thinking due to tiredness etc or whether there could be another reason I'm missing

[Staximus]

How many bathrooms are in the house?

[Frankie9]

There is one bathroom. That's why I found the idea of looking at eBay for 15 minutes strange at that time when all the kids start usually getting up, two of those teens getting ready as well. He sits in the car for half hour before work as he needs to get there early to park. I can understand a quick few min whilst using the toilet but it seemed an excessive amount of time for a universal remote. He wasn't online on anything I could see. I looked at the time because it was getting frustrated sat with a child saying he needed the loo (diahorrea) I guess time really seemed to be dragging in that moment but I still feel it's a bit of a bullshit reason to have given all that time later. He did send me a screenshot to say say 'see' at the time he actually turned the shower on but not sure that shows much really. Takes a minute to place an order