Do guys like having a deep emotional connection with a girl or is it too much?

[Anonymous]

Do guys like this? I mean say you like a girl. She’s physically very attractive and you are able to connect emotionally on a deeper level, you can talk about things in depth, not just surface, but is it too much?

Or do guys actually prefer a girl who is more surface, where they are compatible but don’t go to that next level?

[egan3141]

A deep emotional connection is not the same as talking about things in depth. I can talk in depth with anyone no matter how little connection I have with the person. Emotional connections, I would argue, are just the emotions of physical connection. When you cuddle up watching a movie, the emotions felt from being so close to someone you have such strong feelings for, that is an example of what I could call an emotional connection. And of course men like that

[Asker]

I get what you’re saying, I meant in a different way, like when you can really talk to someone and feel like you deeply connect, because you feel comfortable to talk with them about that topic or something that’s really personal to you. Like you wouldn’t confide with everyone in that say, only those you felt wouldn’t judge you, listen and provide support. Physical connection I feel is easier and should happen in any romantic relationship, but emotional connection isn’t always there or maybe to varying degrees. So I just wondered if guys felt they needed that in a partner or not,

[egan3141]

That sounds more like a trust thing. Do you truly trust the person to say the things you don't normally say. In that case, of course men like being able to trust someone that much, but men usually aren't allowed to be that open, so it's not needed. We grow up learning that we have to keep certain things to ourselves and just deal with it. Some of us are lucky enough to find someone we trust enough to talk about the hard things, but whether that is our partner or someone else is kind of irrelevant.

Actually, now that I'm thinking about it, I don't think it can be a man's girlfriend/wife. A man "has" to be the rock, the foundation, of the relationship. When things are hard in life, it is up to him to stay strong and lead them through. As such, it is "wrong" of him to open up to his partner about how he is truly feeling. Does that make sense? (Trying not to write an essay, so keeping it simple)

[Anonymous]

I would significantly prefer a deeper connection.

[GreyfurtSuyyi]

A man only likes to form an emotional bond with the girl he loves; all other girls mean nothing to him except sex. Men are kind of brainless beings in that sense, so if he loves you, then yes, he likes forming that bond.

[Asker]

Agree, I think you’re right about if there is love then the emotional bond is formed, but don’t think it’s required for love to form or can love occur without it?

[GreyfurtSuyyi]

No, honey, that would just be lust or a classic temporary liking 😀 so it’s necessary.

[jahaims]

Crazy you are that old and still this clueless