My thoughts and your thoughts on "Stiff People."

[Cuddle_Muffin]

Basically I tend to dislike people with the "stiff" personality trait.

They usually are introvert, shy, lonesome, not fun, not expressive, uptight...etc.

I see a lot of guys who ask for advice on this website with this personality trait...and they expect me/you to tell them a way of finding a partner...yet they are so "stiff."

Are you like this?

Do you think there is hope for people like this?

How do they find open and expressive love?

[diabloknk]

I might be somewhat "stiff," although I'm not sure I have the same understanding of it that you do. Mainly, I'm the kind of person who naturally tends towards serious analysis before doing something, and I highly value logic and reason.

As for the other two:

1. Is there hope for people like this? What do you mean by that? Is there hope for them finding romantic relationships? Yes. Is there hope for them to change and become less "stiff?" My answer to that is "Why the hell should I change? I like those aspects of myself."

2. What exactly is "open and expressive" love? Have I found love before? Sure. Were we extraordinarily expressive? Depends. We did tell each other that we loved one another, but if you're asking whether we played those cutesy games a lot of people play or make out in public, no. Neither of us were interested in that.

[Oldermanwhohaslived]

I have to say I have become a little as you call it stiff. I had some life changing things happen over the past few years and my life is a bit of a mess but is getting better. The fact is that with all that has happened I am not very happy and that shows on outside. I would like to meet someone but the truth is that I was married and dedicated to her and when I had some mental health problems that left me less than unfriendly until they got my meds right left me. so I have a problem trusting a woman and getting hurt again. so maybe you might give these stiff people a chance maybe something has changed their lif and that a little human affection is what they need.

[zickzack]

To be open and ask the partner this is the best medicine.

[pr3ttybr0wn]

stiff people probably need to relax. my sister called me stiff and I probably am/was but I was a little insecure, but when I feel confident I am less stiff. so I would advise people like this to loosen up, accept or change their flaws and not take things too seriously

[Anonymous]

i'm kinda "stiff" myself and guess what I really don't give f**k.

i love myself and other people too... OK well that's a lie I can't stand people who spend their time hating on others just because they have nothing better to do.. pathetic ;)

[dIO_oIb]

I've been called "stiff" before, believe it or not. :o (but I don't think I am)

Of course people like this have hope; they just need to find people similar to them.

[Cuddle_Muffin]

Even if they find someone who behaves like them...how can they express themselves...they are very shy and uptight..they might let the opportnity pass... it seems so confusing..

[dIO_oIb]

I don't express myself very often, especially when I'm in a relationship. It's just something I don't do, and I don't have a problem getting into relationships.. Not confusing at all.

[Anonymous]

Of course there's hope, but they have to have the desire and courage to get out of their comfort zone. Hence, the difficulty. These folks have to get back into their bodies - massage, Yoga, stretching, Karate, etc in order to make some forward movement. Then the real clincher - speaking in front of groups and talking to strangers.

Not fun, but infinitely worth it.

[zickzack]

Stiff people are so, like you describe them. But there is a missing the arrogant persons. You find them in the aristocracy and such who identify with them. I would say, such people you can`t change - normally.