Why does he always tell me everything at the last minute?!?!

[Anonymous]

My guy friend always tells me everything just as it's about to happen.

For example, friends made plans to get together and go out, and he (who is 'in charge' of informing me when something like this occurs), he often doesn't tell me what they've got planned until the very last minute!

Once he even called me 2 hours before we were going to go out, and he never even realized that he didn't tell me this before, he was like; 'WHAT?!?! I haven't told you already?!?!?'

What the hell is his deal?!?

Does he hate me that much so he wants me not to be able to go anywhere with them,so he doesn't have to pretend that he likes me?!? Is he doing this just to p*ss me off?!?

Because I know he's not like that since he always informs EVERYONE before me, and that can only mean that he doesn't like me, or perhaps even hates me right?

This is really important!

Help!

Updates

+1 y

Ok...he told me he loves me!

Now I really don't get it! xD

[Seenthatmovietoo]

It has less to do with him loving/hating you than simply his poor grasp of overlapping social calendars it seems. Guys are known to love dropping anything and jumping onto new plans at a minutes notice whereas girls (perhaps rightly so) prefer soooome sort of notice to prepare. His telling the 'guys' at the last second is not at all the same since they were probably instrumental in him deciding exactly 'what' was going to happen. So they are also last minute but so what.

Your choices are simple. Beg off once or twice if it truly bothers you so much to get last minute invites. Explain that it takes longer to prepare/dress/plan whatever but just don't join him if it bothers you. If the lack of your pleasant company on said event bothers hims then he'll make a better effort to include you in a timely manner.

None of it means he hates you so it's good that he said he "loves you' so that you can get your mind out of that drainhole. He's apparently just not as good of a social planner as you'd prefer. Roll with the flow and you'll be fine. Miss an event once in a while and he'll see that he'd prefer you along.

Good luck.

[sachin007]

Ask yourself did he ever loved you?

Remember the times he spent with you and what he does for yu.?

Love means care,trust and feelings about someone

From your story

he is just like being a 'player'

Thnx

[Anonymous]

Maybe he doesn't really want you to go? It's kinda weird that he tells everyone ahead of time but you. Or maybe you guys are not that close as he is to the others or something

[dragonfli786351]

i suggest asking him to inform you earlier, and if he doesn't well make yourself unavailable. your allowing him to tell you last, don't allow him andd he won't.

[Asker]

So true!

[iLoVeUxx2]

maybe they make plans at the last minute. you never know. he wouldn't let you know if he didn't like you

[Notaopossum]

Its control behavior or ADHD. Control behavior could at worst be from a dark triad personality disorder or just a control freak and wants you to pressure your decision. Time pressure is a popular manipulation tactic. Ir could be innocent and subconcious

[25or624]

Have you asked him to inform you ahead of time?

I doubt he hates you. If he hated you, why would he bother spending time with you?

[Asker]

Ok...that's true....

[25or624]

Just ask him. Be nice about it, and avoid blaming or shaming, and frame is as though the problem is yours. "I really like when we're together, but I get a little antsy if I don't know what's up. So can you just clue me in as soon as possible?"

This tactic is usually much more productive than saying "You're always late!"