Why do most of us want kids even though there are always risks?

[Anonymous]

Nothing is 100% safe even though medicine have advanced. We're still taking a risk in even carrying a baby.

Among the things that can go wrong:
- Miscarriages
- Complicated or high risk pregnancy
- Gestational diabetes
- Preeclampsia
- Stillborns
- Maternal death
- Hemorrhage, etc

My own sister had it super hard with her 1st child. Both her and the baby's life we're at risk. They're doing good now but she wanted to go through it all and was more worried about her baby being ok than her own life.

Shockingly, 6 years later... she was pregnant AGAIN. The 2nd time was normal. I didn't think she would go at it again. Wow

Seriously why do most of us want to go through that even with all the risks?

Updates

+1 y

Then I hear of a couple women that underwent either a miscarriage or stillborn... they still go for it again.

Updates

+1 y

Even many years ago (1800's or so) when it was more risky for us, we still continue having kids. Wow

[zeitgeist057]

It's biological. This is the result of natural selection over generation after generation. The result is that people who have a strong urge to procreate and have children predominate the human population. It's the same with other sexually reproducing species as well.

Get some

To take it away from procreation for another example, let's go back millions of years, and imagine there are two types of frog. One type can swim, the other type cannot. Over the millennia, the ones who can swim, survive more than the ones who can't. Because they live (and breed), they become more prolific. Many species have some adaptation or other that helps them survive, but there were many variations that did not survive.

Back to humans. Same thing has been happening with humans, but looking at those who didn't have a drive to have kids, what happened? They didn't have kids, or at least not intentionally. The people who wanted to have kids had the most kids, and out of their kids, some chose not to have kids. Every individual that decided not to have kids, and didn't have any accidentally, their genes stopped there, and didn't move into the future. The lack of desire removed that trait from the gene pool. On the other hand, the desire to have sex (and/or children) keeps getting passed on generation after generation. It's "Survival of the Horniest".

https://www.youtube.com/embed/hL1-340ODCM

[Asker]

Interesting. I've been fighting off baby fever for nearly 6 months now. I'm aware of the risks but yet like those women, imagine having my own child. Yeah, if animals and humans stop procreating then yes the species would die out.

[zeitgeist057]

Not only the risks as you mentioned, but the sheer responsibility is something I think a lot of people don't think about. You have an entire human being dependent on you for every bite of food, every poop and pee, for at LEAST the first 2 years. Then after that, you are responsible for more like 90% of their needs slowly decreasing to about 40% by the time they are teenagers ready to leave you're just buying their food and paying their other expenses, but they are at least wiping their own butts at that point (but probably still leaving you to replace the toilet paper).

Some people have taken to "fur babies" and pouring all that baby fever and affection into a puppy that they train and treat with a similar focus and responsibility that they would for a child. You can also adjust the amount of energy needed based on the breed. A Siberian Husky, Australian or German Shepherd for example would require a lot of time and energy focused on training, whereas other breeds like a Basset Hound or Golden Retriever are much more chill and easy to manage with less effort.

Then there's cats. :)

[TonyV]

Cause it's usually fine, works out well, hell ever heard any of the stories about women going to take a shit and then hear a baby in the toilet? That happens, baby is healthy and the woman didn't even know she was pregnant for 9 months.

Plus you know if every woman was to scared to have a baby we would have gone extinct a long time ago, we're do you think people come from?

Sure it could go wrong, 1 in 4 women miscarry, oh well, my mom miscarried the first time then had me and then my brother.

Everything in live has risk, you could be the most careful person in the world and still die in a car accident. You're worrying too much.

[Anonymous]

Because the desire for a positive outcome (aka have kids in this case) outweigh the risks. Like rather take the risk and have a chance of what you dream of than play it safe and stay miserable knowing you’ll for sure never have what you truly want in life. And like if you want to travel abroad you take the risk of dying in a plane crash, getting murdered or trafficked while there, being robbed or pickpocketed and so on. Everytime you cross the street you decide it’s worth the risk of getting hit by a bus. Everytime you get in a car to go somewhere you risk being in a car crash. Everytime you swim in the ocean you risk getting cramps and drowning or being eaten by a shark. Go out clubbing and you risk getting drugged and raped. There are risks involved in everything and you need to decide if the risk outweigh the positives you will or can get out of the activity. Life wouldn’t really be worth living if you’d just stay in your bedroom 24/7 and never doing anything because of the risks involved would it.

[WhatTheHeckkkk]

Because some women still want to be mothers, despite the risks. Most of these risks can be monitored heavily during the pregnancy, and most of these risks are dealt with immediately and can be prevented with the help of medicine, technology, and doctors…

[NZGirl07]

I think many people have natural maternal and paternal instincts. Raising kids means you get to do life all over again, and experience the fun of toys and games with your child and guide them through the teen years. Raising a child is rewarding and gives life purpose for many people.

[ChrisMaster69]

In the western world, risks have been hugely reduced.

it’s likely more of a risk commuting to work, than it is having a baby.

As any living species there is an urge to procreate, this is why we cover most of the earth.

With anything you can look at statistics and go ‘oh fuck’.

We do DIY at home, even though it has a huge % of injuries and deaths.

Weekends still see DIY shops full of those juggling those risks.

[AviatorTom]

Every creature has an instinct to procreate... to continue their species. Humans are no different... through that instinct can be very strong or very weak, it's there nonetheless

[SnakeBoop]

Yes risks are always there. But it's still plus 90% safe nowadays.
You also tend to forget a little of the stress and such. Probably a bit of a biological standpoint to make more children.

[one1wild00]

Yes, I'm wired that to a degree having kids to carry on the family line is my primary drive/responsibility. If I slow there are times when I'm thinking nothing else really matters except having kids.

[yourmancallsme]

Most of those things are genetic
With God on my side nothing shall go wrong in my pregnancies
Nothing will put me off I want 8+ kids🤪

[DiegoO]

It's called biology, hun. Reproduction is what keeps our species afloat. I don't want kids, but I can understand why most want and end having kids.

[malwins]

Why?

[DiegoO]

@malwins Why I don't have kids? #1. At 32 I haven't gain financial indepence (my "father" (fuck him, he doesn't deserve to be called "father") commited fraud with a land my mother own. He bleed our financial future (That land was our feature!). #2. After a 3 years LDR, which ended in 2017, I understood I need to radically change myself, therefore I understand I am not ready for a relationship. #3 From the experience of others and my own, I realized having a partner requires lot of things I can't provide. Been so, I am just not fit for a naturally functional relationship.

[Sam_The_Savage]

If your mom thinks this way in her times than you are not in this world..

[joeldalton]

There's risks of walking down the street. It's literally impossible to live your life without risk.

[Anonymous]

I guess maternal instinct to procreate, it’s just wired into our brains some things that we just understand, it’s just a survival of the species instinct I guess

[Guido]

Having kids and raising my family was the highlight of my life. I wouldn't trade it for anything.

[dolemite89]

women’s instincts and emotions come before logic. they want kids even if it ruins their life.

[RandomGuy1030]

They want to live on for forever in some shape or form

[Luv2BRealExotic13]

A biological need to copy and pass your genes.

[penteractgaming]

Everything you do or don't do, carries a risk.

[jasco]

Lots of people like kids

[Reijen]

Minimal risks now compared to back then.

[malwins]

Bc they r so freaking cute

[In_Trance]

Everything is a risk

[jimmy2]

You are right