Why would a narcisist stress you out to the point of depression and nervous breakdown and get surprised when you dont look attractive anymore?

[catarecute]

i feel that narcissist dn't really understand science and how stress affects the body and our beauty. they stress us out and then get funny when we start looking like shit.

[sage2021]

I had to work with a young lady, just out of college and she was a chemical engineer. Most people aren't aware that to be a chemical engineer you have to be very, very intelligent/smart.
But I was her secretary in our group along with the other's in biotechnology.
Anyway, she made big money. Since I was the secretary, I was on the lower pay skill. Working with her was weird. I knew she had to be smart, however, when it came to street smarts, she was dumber than a rock. Ah, but she had me, and I have great street smarts. So, anything she needed to figure out like what's a Walmart store and what's in there, she would come to me for the answers. She was very premiscuous. She even met guys at the Target store and give men in there her work phone number. Then when they would call she would tell me to take a message. Well, that got old quick! I told the boss to teach her to give them her home number.
She came to work on Halloween dressed as Snow White. She must have rented it because it looked so expensive and perfect. She was in heaven pretending to be Snow White that day at work. It made her feel special.
Her premiscuousness was the reason for her termination. She was having sex with our clients and didn't think anything was wrong with something like that!
She was a Daddy's Little Girl, and I believe instead of doing everything for her, instead of teaching her things, really crippled her in life.

[Billlewis]

@sage2021 It sounds like you were doing most of the work and she was receiving the majority of the credit for it.

[catarecute]

we all make mistakes in life, if she likes the client why couldnt she sleep with him. she is free. if she got to become a chemial engineer was probably because she was money driven and it is the best paid career even better paid than doctors and that was because of her rich dad. if she wasn't money driven she would have done a chemistry degree and just become a teacher and been ok with this. whats so sad it people firing young people for small mistakes (basically ruining their life) after they work so hard to get where they are. people like dont see how they are affecting others. the world is a mess because people act without thinking. same in the uk where i used to live. people fire everyone for every little things and then the government wonders why people dont bother working anymore or studying when they can make more money living on benefits and dont get fired.

[sage2021]

@catarcute
I heard that after she left our company, she got married and had a baby right away. So I didn't worry about her after that.
But I'd like to add that employees having intercourse with business clients IS a VERY Big deal. You should check it out.

[catarecute]

i live in france and watch the news everyday. the world has so many problems yet people keep on thinking they know what is a big deal or not, what is right or wrong, what is acceptable or not, how people should act or think, what should be legal or not. the truth people don't know shit or the world wouldn't be in such a mess.

[DaveJord]

I agree that Narcissist are well versed and skilled at emotionally manipulating people. They are very good at earning your trust then abusing it. Making question everything, and over time even questioning your sanity.

What makes you turn ugly, is state of mind. And yes, stress can cause physical effects on your body. Like I like to think I am a laid-back person, but when come across people with anxiety issues they stress me out. Like walking on eggshells and it really causes lots of stress.

So why do they do it?

Because for most they don't even know or are aware that they are doing it... that's why its mental disorder or some type of Borderline Phycological Disorder (BPD).

[catarecute]

i agree because i think i am almost a sociopath with some narcissistic traits. i acted narcisticicaly with an ex a long time ago. looking back there was a reason for that he tld me none of his friends likes me and that might have been true but it really hurt me still because i didn't know why. i am not narcissistic with everyone but i think its mainly people who i feel are arrogant and dumb. i have a real problem tolerating dumb people.

[DaveJord]

Well a true sign of narassic is when they put themselves about other or assume they are better than others. So for example if a narcissist assumes you are dumb, they putting thier intellegence about that of the other person. In that way they feel justified for doing and saying the things they do. Why because they are smarter than you... and in doing this make you feel dumb and unappreciated. But to true narcissist they would see nothing wrong with that, because they are lucky to be dating you in first place because you are better and smarter than they are.

So, to the Non narcissistic person it very confusing to them as to why you feel smarter than that are, and how you get to decide for them what's dumb and what's not. It takes them time to figure out that there is no rational reason why you would think that other than the fact that you are narcist and you can't help yourself.

A narcist will never admit they are wrong. They are not even aware of their narcissistic behaviors, because it usually stems from childhood trauma, or emotional abuse and patterns of behaviors they learned from their parents. Since they had no positive parental influences, they never learned how to really love someone or more importantly how to love themselves without tearing down other, to hide their own deep-rooted insecurities.

[catarecute]

i did a few iq tests and i have above average iq and a lot of people are actually dumb. i was put in great danger many times because people did something dumb some three times i nearly died. so thinking people are dumb is a protection mechanism for me.

[DaveJord]

Yeah, I did a few IQ tests as well, I am fucking genius, the problem is I am the only one that knows it.
So, if I were as smart as you think you are, then people would just know that about me without me ever making the point. I would not be associating with dumb people, because I am so smart, I would only find smart people. Problem is that nobody is as smart as me... right?

If everyone else was not so dumb they would all know and respect my high level of intelligence. So, does that sound narcissistic to you?

[catarecute]

know if you are smart you are smart its not narcistic to think something truth about yourself. i dont brag about being smart to anyone. i think that you can actualy increase and deacrease iq throughout your life by exercising your brain and learning. so to me being smart is a choice. some people dont want to be smart learn better themselves or make an effort to not make stupid choices. they put themselves and others in danger with there stupidity and on top of that they think that they are to good for their boots. those are the people i can't tolerate. honestly i am sociopathic in some ways but i have a lot of empathy. i am really patient forgiving and understanding but for me to be a good person who can love and forgive others i also need to be smart so people dont see my kindness for weakness and think they can manipulate me. i

[DaveJord]

You might be a narcissist. I know people with PhD's and they are the stupidest smart people you would ever know. Can break down molecular chemistry but can figure out how to put gas in their car. They can develop these elaborate excel sheets, with all these data formulas, and pivot charts and graphs with data tables... but have no idea how to talk to people. They super smart, but how smart are they really? They can tell you everything you would ever want to know about a healthy breeding population of frogs, but struggle to say hello to a real person... super smart right? But not really.

What you deem as smart, may not be smart to others. Who really gets to decide that, the smart people right, but what makes them so smart? What makes someone else dumb?

It's all subjective.

You know who Jeff Foxworthy is? Old comedian that would make the Red Neck jokes. Like this.

"You might be Red neck if... the stock market crashes, and it does not affect you one bit."
"You might be a Red Neck if... you live in a home with wheels on it."
"You might be a Red Neck if... you have 6 cars in your driveway, but only one of them has all four tires on it."

Well, you might be a Narcissist... if you are the only one that knows how smart you are.

You might be a narcist if you pronounce your intelligence, but you write an entire post without using a signal upper case letter at the beginning of every any sentence. Because you do not believe proper grammar is a reflection of your intelligence and if you were as smart as they were you would know that.

[catarecute]

now you are just trying to put me down and please dont say some clichee like "you can't take critisism so you are definetly a narcisist". i know i have narcisistic traits i just admited it on my post i dont need you to tell me this. i would say i am more sociopathic than narcisistic. i dont care about spelling that you are right doesn't make me a narcisist. what you are decribing above is more asergers syndrom than narcisism. people with aspergers are desorganised in real life and they sometime have coordination problems and are smarter with books and theorical stuff. that why they are messy and strugle to do things like put gas in their car. they also have social skills issues and can appear self centered which people confuse for narcisism. people with aspergers run the world literaly. bill gate, mozart, eistein and even elon musk have aspergers syndrom. practicaly everything you use including electricity internet and your phone you have because someone with aspergers.

[DaveJord]

Your right you did admit being narcissistic. I apologize, that's good sign honestly. It means you might not be a complete narcissistic. You still have a chance, because true narcissistic would never admit fault.

But you are right, you did not deny it, so I am wrong for being a jerk. I am sorry.

[boggboss]

Why do u think he is being genuine or honest about bot knowing why

[catarecute]

noone wants an ugly wife. if he understood how stress affect beauty he wouldn't do it. i remember talking to this narc who just broke up with his girlfriend. he started telling me that his ex developed an eating disorder and got hospitalised. he seem genuinely oblivious to the fact he was the cause of it.

[boggboss]

U ate acting ad if he will stay with u for the rest of your life he can and will leave when he wishes he dont care about how u are affected because he dont care about you

[catarecute]

what a miserable life they live. destroying each girlfriend then dumbing them until they are too old to get a date and are alone at home masturbating on some porn magazin and paying for prostitutes.

[boggboss]

Miserable in your perspective but thats because they don't want the same thing u wpuld want they get enjoyment out of that process knowing they are able to get a women to fall for them and destroy them is what they enjoy they are not looking for long lasting love

[catarecute]

most narcissists are miserable. the life they create for themselves isn't actually want they want. they are victims as well a lot of them were emotionally abused as a child.

[boggboss]

I'm not sure that's true with all or most not enjoying their lives I know many suffer from being abused but it dont mean it makes them all miserable

[sage2021]

@catarecute
That's exactly what happened to my boyfriend who died suddenly a little over a week. His then wife was 130lbs when they got married and weighed 330 when she died in her 40's.
He did that to her. She had diabetes and he got her hooked on food, especially Krispy Kreme donuts. He only weighed about 150 when she died. He was always proud of his nice looking body.
Then living with me this past year and half, even though he was on the skinny side, he got diabetes too! The more anyone would try to keep from eating sweets, he'd wait till I was asleep and eat a 1/2 gallon of ice cream and milkshake, cookies, pies, chocolate candy. He was addicted to sweets his entire life. Well, just before he died suddenly, he told me that day his blood sugar was 337! And he started to get chubby around his tummy.
Sometimes life is a bitch and what comes around goes around. He died from the same affliction.

[catarecute]

@sage2021 yea was watching videos on the internet of overweight people in America. this black woman who i think also had money was really fat and this skinny man was pretending he loved her and was feeding her food telling the doctors he wanted her to be happy. at the end she dies and i am sure he got her money as she didn't have children. the doctors should have picked up on the guy and reported him for attempted murder.

[catarecute]

@sage2021 i what you are saying is this was my karma for rejecting men i dont believe god is that cruel i think the way that i loved this man was so pure that god wouldn't be so cruel to destroy this to punish me. it was definetly not karma it was just the guy was a dick. i believe in a god who loves his children and want his world to big good and wouldn't punish someone for being loving.

[sage2021]

@catarecute
No... I wasn't referring to you when I made that comment.
It was just that my boyfriend got his diabetic wife hooked on sweets and it killed her.
He probably died from the same cause as he caused her; having diabetes and eating too many sweet things.

[jeffend888]

Yeah I really don't think truly narcissistic people know how their behavior affects other people. And if they do, they don't care.

That's why they're narcissistic people. They do basic shit they're supposed to do and they act like they're doing you a favor. And then they get off on you trying to understand them when what you really should be doing is moving on with your life and creating a nuclear family with a normal person.

[strateguy632]

they are surprised because they did not expect nor think of the results of their behavior