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Modern Marriage Isn't Working... (Page 2)
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Marriage is for idiots. I was stupid enough to do it 2x (1993 and 1997), but at least I learn from my mistakes by the 2nd time. These days there's no need for it to even have kids and build a family and certainly not just to fuck or have a relationship. It's an obsolete piece of paper that's overwhelmingly in favor off the female by default. Any guy that signs such an agreement is thinking with his dick, not his head.
I agree with you on ALL of these points! I think 5, 6 and 8 seem to affect almost every marriage or relationship today.
Agreed!
I agree
Pretty good take on this, wondering if you're married? I was for 17 years and should have gotten out sooner, things just changed after ten years, finances really effects a marriage and then she cheated so that really changed things but I still tried to keep it together and we had kids. Well things are calmer these days after being divorced more than a year, we seem to be better at being friends than married so that's a plus and the kids are fine but I am lonely at times
Do you have a moral issue with prostitution? Its expensive but I think more men. should consider it. I honestly think its the way of the future. Its pricey but I think its a good alternative because its at least honest. You lose money your sanity dignity as a man and eventually your kids in a marraige with prostitution you just lose money and its a pay as you go basis vs a flat rate (half of all your money and then some)
@Blake0048 Yeah I've heard this argument before and it does make sense financially in the long run, if there were only better ways of protecting ourselves from financial ruin when marriage doesn't work out, I've heard that prenuptial agreements aren't even that good because that contract can be thrown out by a judge
Nope. I'm 16 so unmarried
You are very mature for 16
Yup. :)
Wow! you're only 16!!! That is amazing! Such awareness. My son is young and wise beyond his years too. Do you have a hard time finding people your age who can relate to you?
@Blake0048 wow. Prostitution?
This is an amazing take, like I agree 100% with all of these. Please pm I'd like to follow you if you don't mind?
Sure!
many of the smart successful younger engineers where I work are marrying Asian or south American girls to avoid the "big mouth fat feminist bitch" that is the new American girl. I think this is the only reasonable alternative now and will work out well for them if theier wives don't get indoctrinated
It isn't just marriage, it's dating as well. Relationships these days are usually based on what a person get from their partner.
I totally agree! Thanks for sharing this amazing take!
You're welcome poet 😉
Oh wait who dat._.
You know who...
._. Yeah
This is modern marraige
lol I posted the same picture some time ago.
@Lopezz1999 i posted a question.
www.girlsaskguys.com/.../q2475761-do-these-pics-show-what-modern-marraige-is-like-for-men
Lol explains about 90% of single moms
@lord_chilled exactly you need to avoid single moms or you will be her next victim/babydaddy
Basically cost is too much thus both people spend time working for money.
The woman and man get lonely. Someone cheats because we work too much and surrounded by other people more than spouse.
Main cause is the money.
@Warmapplecrumble thats not really an excuse
@lord_chilled yes but that's the reason. It all boils down to money.
@Warmapplecrumble i guess its better to be broke and intimate rather than be rich and lonely.
But then again, i hear a lot of low income-men get cheated on too, their women banging rich guys.
there's no winning
@lord_chilled if you want to live in this society you need to be rich or move to the jungle.
@Warmapplecrumble you dont need to be rich. Well off is good enough.
Plus its better that way, you relate to people better can make more friends overall and are down to earth and humble.
Rich people feel entitled and cocky.
And they can't relate with more average people.
@lord_chilled we are middle class and we struggle lmao. 90 percent is just our shitty flat which has everything broken in it.
If we didn't pay rent we would be rich.
@Warmapplecrumble yeah, everyone in moddle class struggles a bit. I have had similar issues and in my current apartment sometimes shit happens too, but i have gotten ised to those things.. Tbh i wouldn't really mind this sort of lifestyle.
But im doing college and hopefully will move up a bit.
However its not much of a concern. Im the kinda guy who wouldn't be sad doing a blue collar job, having a wife and kids, and getting happiness from enjoying a cold beer with my buddies.
Thats all i pretty much want.
A simple life.
I dont want to be rich and have the complicated life that comes with it
@lord_chilled I just want my partner there with me. To spend time with him.
I don't mind living in the woods or jungle. :-/
I don't want to die knowing we just lost the time just working to keep a roof over our head. I want to enjoy our time together.
@Warmapplecrumble true true..
@lord_chilled "we are middle class and we struggle lmao. 90 percent is just our shitty flat which has everything broken in it. " I'm afraid you are working class.
The working class (also labouring class and proletariat) are the people employed for wages, especially in manual-labour occupations and in skilled, industrial work. Working-class occupations include blue-collar jobs, some white-collar jobs, and most service-work jobs. The working class only rely upon their earnings from wage labour, thereby, the category includes most of the working population of industrialized economies, of the urban areas (cities, towns, villages) of non-industrialized economies, and of the rural workforce.
@Warmapplecrumble The middle class is a class of people in the middle of a social hierarchy. In Weberian socio-economic terms, the middle class is the broad group of people in contemporary society who fall socio-economically between the working class and upper class. The common measures of what constitutes middle class vary significantly among cultures. A sizable and healthy middle-class can be viewed as a characteristic of a healthy society.
Times have changed and a college education no longer guarantees a good living and reasonable middleclass lifestyle.
I understand. Im not complaining
@lord_chilled I was directing that at @Warmapplecrumble it sounds like I was talking over her.
Oh okay. My bad
@lord_chilled actually in UK there's seven classes.
I consider myself middle class based on our lifestyle, thought process, etc etc.
But we are probably financially at same level as someone who is below working class. However, the way we live is not by any means working class.
Class system in my opinion is not only what is in your account but your lifestyle and mentality.
Lmao UK is so class - est that we have a class based on how well we speak. Me and my partner both have posh accents.
@Warmapplecrumble to be middle class in my opinion you need to at least own your own house, have to cars. What your describing is living beyond your means with nothing in reserve and no future.
Lol owning a house is very expensive... you need million pounds where I live.
@Warmapplecrumble most people who think they are middle class are actually working class. A million was worth $317,687.80 in 1980. During the economic downturn many people who thought they were middle class found out they were not. If you are living on credit and paying a 3rd of everything you make servicing the interest on loans and credit cards all to maintain the image of a middle class lifestyle, owning no property so that when something like an economic crash comes all of a sudden you have no income, no home and the bank takes away your car then you are not middle-class. Middle class values are hard work, self-discipline, thrift, honesty, aspiration and ambition. We have few loans and only take them out to up my credit rating, we our own home , we have two cars which we own. Coming from a trailer park I learned to be very tricky and roughed It out in the beginning. To pay my way through college I joined the army and took jobs...
... that paid well but were dirty such as in construction and logging, eventually I was able to buy my own place though it wasn't much, got my degree and started msking some real money. I recommend having no debts and no loans if you can manage it, it really works out better in the long run.
Owning a house is very difficult in London, which happens to be the most expensive city in the world
... okay I'm working class lol.
But I don't have any loans. And no we don't choose to live a show off lifestyle.
To me two things our important the house and good food. Hence I'd pay majority of my wage on this.
Now we could choose to eat unhealthy and do longer hours and have shitty house but what's the point if we die?
We eat healthy, and live in not so shitty apartment. We try to recreate a family environment where we spend evenings together. If that means we are poor then rest - so be it. I don't know when I'll die. I might as well enjoy the time I have now.
@Warmapplecrumble failing to prepare is preparing to fail. I guess my upbringing has a lot to do with my attitude, I grew up dirt poor and ain't ever going back.
You can save but saving till point of death is stupid.
Remember its the journey not the ending.
When you are in your death bed, how money you saved won't help you or make you feel better.
It's the little memories.
Much*****
@Warmapplecrumble when your on your death bed and have no health insurance and lived your life breaking your back to get by, wearing your body out until you pass on before you can retire savings in the bank would help.
I don't stress my body in that way, my periods would stop and I will develop fertility diseases. Too much stress for a woman is very bad.
Stress is actually main cause of diseases.
Working tooooo hard is reason for many diseases. People in last lived only till 30s because they worked so hard.
And its a luxury to afford health insurance in UK because we already pay 200 pounds every month fpr shitty National Health Insurance
Past*******
@Warmapplecrumble I actually don't have to work to hard anymore because i planned ahead and worked hard at the beginning to build the future. My wife has been at home with the kids this last 2 years and we don't miss her paycheck too much because we don't have huge loans or debts that have extortionate interest rates and we don't have rent or a mortgage to pay or car payments to make. My neighbours think I earn 3 times what they make because almost every couple have both out working to pay the bills.
That's great for you lol.
The car is not so important at least in London.
But house would be nice to have in the richest city. Great equity.
Children. I am not sure if we want children.
@Warmapplecrumble you might have to move out a bit of London and buy a cheaper home and once you've got a good bit of it paid off upgrade to either a better place or a place closer to the city. Basically paying rent is paying another person's mortgage on the place you live, that's why worked so hard to own my own place so I wouldn't have to work so hard long term.
We need to save and just move from UK. UK is going really shitty after Brexit. We have rationing on spinach and salad lol?
We just need to find a place that won't attack interracial couples, who speak English and aren't religious.
Buying a house here is like you committed a crime. The paper work takes 6 months, and their requirements for mortgage are stupid.
@Warmapplecrumble have you thought about Ireland, you can't throw a stone in Ireland without hitting an English person. Though it's the same scenario of high wages, few jobs, high rents and expensive food. Canada or Australia would be the ticket I think.
I think things will be shit under the torys regardless of BREXIT. Is interracial dating really a big thing in London? I thought London was like the interracial dating capital of the world. Here in America nobody pays attention.
We are accepted more in London.
Other places we get strange looks.
Especially the clothes I wear get attention. Because everyone for some reason assumes I'm "Muslim" ... that's another problem. After the attacks everyone thinks I am not trustworthy cause of my brown skin.
Lmao my partner he's Caucasian I'm Mixed North Indian. We are like hippies and not religious at all and introverts. Our personality would get us kicked out off a village.
@Warmapplecrumble im not suprised at that considering London has a huge non white population at 41% and a Muslim mayor. I dont live there so I don't really know.
I take it you wear traditional Indian clothes?
I was born and raised Catholic, I always wore dresses even as a child.
But yeah, I think me and my partner would struggle a lot to move somewhere else. Because of our personality and interracial relationship. In case I have a child, I don't want them to be bullied.
@Warmapplecrumble children get bullied no matter what race or creed. Bullies always pray on the weak.
Got bullied for looking and acting different... don't want same for my child
@Warmapplecrumble I got the same at school but was able to fight back , that's why I hope my kids will be strong enough mentally and physically to look after themselves because I can't always be there and school anti bullying policies are just like service.
Lol you can't stand up for yourself when there's 10 bullies and 1 you. Even the teacher is scared of these kids.
Children get bullied for listening to different music.
Bullying is real and so many children get killed, hit, raped , commit suicide. Don't understand why people take it so lightly.
In fact, if you have children you have to conform to society. And school makes sure you do that. The car, the house, the white collar job, the two kids. The Jones lifestyle - the perfect family.
We are not the Jones. And don't intend to live that lifestyle. I just like to do things I enjoy not because others do it. Heck some stuff we do would have taken me to the stake in the olden days.
@Warmapplecrumble well aware of bullying I attended a rough school and growing up as white trash in a trailer park surrounded by meth dealers didn't help.
We are actually considering homeschooling, my wife was home schooled until 15 and was finished college by 19.
I'm starting to think the idea of a non-conformist lifestyle is very conformist and has become very commercial
I am not sure of legalities of home schooling and the child not seeing enough peers their age causing social anxiety.
That's very good for our society to not conform. We need people to be more accepting and open minded.
@Warmapplecrumble Social interaction is important but our local schools are just not safe. I saw it growing up, the bullying was bad but when you add in the gangs, the drugs, the beatings, knifings and shootings you'd be crazy to send your kids. Nobody cares when a school kid gets killed, the school board and other authorities go through the same sympathetic bullshit.
often the people who claim to be open minded have the most closed rigid minds.
I agree with home schooling but I have no understanding about its legalities.
And I consider myself very open minded lol, so thanks I didn't realise I was rigid.
@Warmapplecrumble I wasn't talking about you lol.
Homeschooling is legal here but authorities try to make it difficult and hold teaching at home to a higher standard than schools.
Oh I see. I have to research into it one day (home schooling).
And I have nothing else to say lol.
Aha OP I remember answering that question!
Our marriage works well, guaranteed.
Our son and his wife had their second child recently. in my opinion, their couple is solid.
That's good to hear!
This ain't new for marriage: it was a contract 1000 years ago.
Wow. An intelligent person on GAG. You don't see that every day.
Partially yes. But it's intensity is increasing day by day and hence the divorce rates are
@myTake Owner so you're saying marriage wasn't as bad 1000 years ago when people were literally sold as property to be married? Divorces were lower, but only because divorce was usually punished by death or torture or both.
I totally agree with everything you wrote, and all that explains why people now are running away from marriage. If you dont work on a good marriage life, you dont really love the person, etc. Then it will be like hell.
when its the right person and the points mentioned above in this take are avoided then I believe marriage is a beautiful thing
I totally agree with number 8, what happened to working it out and being together through sickness and all
Marriage makes no sense anyway unless you want to create a family but even then I fail to see the point.
And no, porn does NOT destroy relationships and marriages. It's the weak minds, that do.
You could have easily gone along with the sheep, but you didn't. Kudos to you. Baaaah
@OliviaSmith 😀😊 right? 😂 that's what i was thinking. We can't j judge between truth and lies these days! Baaah back right at ya 😋
I'm not trying to stroke your ego, because that's not my style.
There's an old saying, "If you want to be rich, look what the poor people are doing and don't do it."
I like that you aren't as chickenshit as most. :)
Congrats man. Great job, I really enjoyed reading the take. Thanks for sharing your wisdom : ).
You're welcome :)
Thanks for the 5 xper. Couples these days are now incredibly sub surface. It has to do with the culture we accept now as part of the issue; and no amount of change will create a difference of opinion within this generation. They need to either..:
1) die
or 2) mature the f%ck up
I didn't gave you any xper points...
Nah, this question is worth 5 xper if i comment on it so gratzi none the less.
Oh.. I didn't receive any message saying your take is chosen as MyTake of the day
Whelp it was so congrats
My only problem with this is that it doesn't actually offer solutions just points out really common problems. Marriage would improve if you ended many problems such as financial ignorance, increased self-discipline or just made people friendlier than they are currently.
That's all fine and good but it doesn't give a path on how to do it just that it needs to be done. Who in their right mind can disagree with you that life gets better when you take out negative things?
God bless you for saying what I was thinking! lol
And what does he mean by, "modern marriage?"
Is this a new concept? Did it just start in 2012?
It sounds to me like he is just fishing for endearing compliments from women.
"Oh, asker, that's so sweet. I wish I could find a guy like you."
@Midget_hug Basic concept is if you know the problems you can find the solutions. I agree that I've mentioned problems here but every couple has these problems with different intensity. I can creat a take for the solutions but i don't think it will be universal. I will be useful for several couples only
@OliviaSmith When i say modern marriage it means marriage in 21 century
Oh, OK. So this has only been going on for 17 years. That's good do know.
I thought this was something that's been going on for a much longer time.
But what are your solutions? Why don't you post that?
It's like saying that we should save the whales. Cool, now what?
@OliviaSmith Sure! I was thinking about creating a take about solutions. But I'm allowed to post only 3 takes per day so I'll Post it tomorrow.
Now you're cooking!
I wasn't being mean, but I just didn't get what the point was.
It would be like saying that pollution is a bad thing. OK, cool. :)
I look forward to your positive insights. :)
@OliviaSmith by the way we should save the whales lol
Sounds awesome. But can we do it next week?
Them fuckers have been around for years. Another week won't kill them. :)
@OliviaSmith It will may be.. Ig 2-3 sharks will be dead by next week
*whales
Call me old fashioned but I think it still works.
No you are not old fashioned. Marriage works if we make it work :)
Thanks
My parents were married, all they ever did was scream abuse at one another, every minute they were both in the house was a living hell, I vote to abolish marriage.
I think, the sex stops, don't know why, then the sex starved one goes to get it somewhere else! I see ads on Craigslist ALL THE TIME, saying "married, no sex for years, come fuck me".
I believe it still works. If I didn’t, I wouldn’t have just gotten married. My adorable husband is asleep right next to me right now and every time I look at him I love him more and feel so lucky to get to spend my life with him.