I noticed you have to be lucky to be married or it be in your destiny to be married. I’m 25 think I’ll never get married to the guy I love. At this age my sister in law was married and she has perfect life home kids. I’m alone in an apartment have boyfriend visit me, and it’s hard as I’m a women and desire do mature women things like have baby, go to the market with my man, take care of baby together in our house, visit family with our baby, plan future together. At my job I hear all men talk of babies and no marriage. They are 18-40. I never see or hear of a man talk of marriage or excited meet family. I never understood why god made my step siblings marry fast at age 22 and u deserve not be happy & 25/26 never married?
534 opinions shared on Marriage & Weddings topic. Getting married for men is very risky. Sometimes, it is easier if everyone’s bank account matches. And in my case, there will be a prenuptial. This is often a stumbling block to many.
There’s lots to get through when it comes to marriage
03 Reply
Most Helpful Opinions
I think many men don´t want to marry because they only hear the bad stories like marry a woman she cheats on you every chance she gets...
Or marry a woman you fight and she´ll divorce you and ruin your life...
When I look my life I don´t see none of this my parents have been married for nearly 50 years, many of friends parents either haven´t hard a divorce or had one in good terms for both.
Yes it has become a harder to find a guy who says he want to marry but at the same time talk is cheap.
I think the chance that you find a good partner is still there but it may take time because men and women have had their own share of trauma concerning relationships. Have patience with yourself because it´s pretty common that nowadays finding the right partner takes time.00 Reply
I know a few guys who don't want to get married because they are worried their freedom will be lost. They see marriage like prison. It apparently limits 'the number of womens' eyes on them'. They're probably players and they probably enjoy not being limited to one woman but rather sharing their body with several. Disgusting, but that's exactly how some guys think.
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Having children then getting married does happen. I don't agree with it either. I mean what if the male decides to leave after the kid is born because he doesn't have anything to commit to as there is no marriage. Traditional marriage then baby making is more logical and a safer option for women and their children.
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That’s not true. Men can easily leave you n divorce and you are single mom. My dad cheated on mom while married and pregnant so she is single mom. My aunt has baby with boyfriend and they are together strong long time. Her ex husband is In jail she was stuck single mom with 3 kids.
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All I can say is that each relationship is different, levels of trust and communication are different, if the conversation of marriage/kids and a future with the other person hasn't been made then it's likely they haven't thought about it yet. There is no point in comparing your relationship to others'. Just talk to your guy and sort it out.
+1 yI don’t think love is enough. Maybe you should date a man with whom you can have more values in common.
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What Girls & Guys Said
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12Opinion
Honestly the institution of marriage had lost its attraction to many men. See it casualty of modern society. Women want to be equal to men in every way... but they still want to marry men and have kids. That means different things to men and women, because we are still just men and women... sure we can be equal, but we ain't the same.
Divorce can be extremely destructive. Most men have no issue paying what right for his children. But he not trying to be a wage laborer for a women.13 Reply- +1 y
Most modern women are not wanting to get married anymore, many are not having children either. It really comes down to the fact that they have almost entirely lost with the institution of marriage the security they require to do so.
From a practical point of view Marriage as security institution does not exist anymore. What we have is the crippled fragments of that institution which not serving the original propose of supporting children are simply tools to abuse.
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@DaveJord You never needed marriage to do anything for the value of marriage was at least formerly to bind the parents together for the support of children.
Would you suppose that said children no longer require said support?
If so how do you explain the ever deteriorating condition of said population consistent with the ever growing prevlance of a lack of support at home?
If you do agree children need both parents, then would you then agree the only reason people don't need the legal contract they call 'marriage' today is because it really isn't marriage at all in that it provides no security.
Mainly because of all the horror stories about women , most common reason. Is when a girl goes through menopause , and losing her mind , A friend of mine is a police officer and he said they have so many cases of women going through menopause that damage a marriage with a good man that loved his wife with all his heart and she sabotages the relationship, also so many good guys’ get arrested because of her starting fights with him and acting like the victim when really she is the abuser ,
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Anonymous(36-45)+1 yPeople don't get married in the west because the institution as it is currently defined in law and popular culture to most young people is no longer advantageous.
Marriage was originally about the security of Family and children having nothing to do with the feelings of the adult parties. Hence why it was historically forced and arranged because it served a vital propose to society and those children. Who's interest superseded that of the often immature adult parties.
This is also why we have the historic pressure to get married and historic laws that make divorced nearly impossible. This is what Marriage was for 10s of thousands of years around the world.
Over the 20th center in the west that institution has since been completely re-defined effectively abandoning the key security with no-fault divorce while re-orientated in the popular imagination the propose of said institution to be entirely about the feelings IE:'love' of the adult parties.
Well as it happens nobody wants or needs anyone's permission to 'feel' anything for anyone. So if Marriage is about said 'feelings' its not really worth the paper its written on.
As such why bother getting married?00 Reply
Anonymous(30-35)+1 yIt constantly surprises me how some women still don't understand why today's men don't want to get married. Marriage has lost it's appeal to men because today's version of it is nothing like the version of the past that our grandparents and even parents enjoyed. You can talk all you want about the alleged benefits of marriage but we men watch the world around us and see the reality of it. Marriage is a very risky thing for men now with the high divorce rate and the fact that it is almost always the wife who files for divorce, and divorce is very biased in favor of women's interests and needs. Essentially women have made marriage too expensive and sex too cheap, and the institution of marriage is in decline as a result. Just not a wise choice for men anymore.
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+1 ySome men do want to get married I was raised in a house hold with my mom and dad and yes they were married. The people that normally dont want to get married are people that came from a broken home or seen pr had bad experiences with married and don't realize how beautiful it is when you married to your soul mate. Yes I said soulmate and yes it does exist you just have to take your time and find that person. If your boyfriend know you want to get married and he clearly doesn't then move on he's not the one for you go find a man that wants to give you the world
02 Reply- +1 y
Yeah no, not really. People are just realizing marriage is b. s. No real point to it , but for someone to make money off of it lol. Never met a man with a scrap book of how he dreams of his wedding.. And more people are getting unbrainwashed from religion. And people have too many choices of whom to date. Love isn't proven by a piece of paper.
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@Bklynbadboy12 I think if you just clicked with someone well enough to always enjoy them like a 'soul mate' you wouldn't really require the institution of marriage in the first place.
@Paul09 There was a point to the original institution for the majority of us who simply never found a person they naturally jived with in our 20s to be able to secure our children's future. Unfortunately legally and now culturally with no-fault divorce and the redefinition of Marriage to focus on 'feelings' that institution doesn't exist anymore.
What we are left with really is pointless as you pointed out for the simple reason you don't need anyone's permission to feel anything for anyone.
Anonymous(30-35)+1 yMarriage today for men is very different than it was only a few decades ago. There are fewer benefits to marriage for men now, and it is much riskier for them as well. Half of marriages end in divorce, women file 80% of divorces and men get screwed in divorce court and child custody settlements. Add to that the fact that casual sex has become the norm and you have a recipe for failure of the institution of marriage. That's why the number of men who are refusing to get married is at an all time high.
00 ReplyWomen are brainwashed into think they need that. You don't, you can have a happy life without it. You have to do this, you have to do that, by this age? Come on. What do you get our if marriage anyways, what benefits? Why does love have to be proven by a piece of religious paper? You worry about it for nothing. Get out more, meet men that have same values, don't force yourself to be with someone you'll regret being with , just because you want to he with someone.
00 Reply858 opinions shared on Marriage & Weddings topic. I wanted to get married. I was 25 and all of a sudden I was just sick of being single and dating and all the BS that goes along with it. It just was time for me to do it. That was 27 years ago.
02 ReplyThe values are being lost with marriage. WIth the rise of hookup culture and no commitment seems to be on the rise. I would love to be married and have a family, I would argue its not just men, but both sexes.
00 Reply50% of marriages end in divorce and women initiate 80% of those divorces.
This ain't rocket science.
00 ReplyYou are better off staying single
02 Reply
+1 yscared for their pockets
10 Reply
+1 yI got married 3 times, Haji Ana
00 ReplyI definitely do
00 Reply
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