Why do people marry people similar to them?

Question

I have been reviewing marriage / divorce data and I have noticed a very obvious startling pattern amongst the vast majority of marriages. I would say that almost 90% of married couples are 5 years or less apart. Most people tend to be married to those who have similar educational attainment and socioeconomic status to them. Overwhelming majority of college educated men end up marrying college educated women. Vast majority of people tend to marry someone similar in age. Rich men tend to marry rich women. Poor men tend to marry poor women. Uneducated men tend to marry uneducated women.

TenderFantasy · Accepted Answer

First of all, can you give me the links/references where you saw this if you don't mind?

Next, I can probably come up with a multitude of reasons. I think it's because people who are similar in age (for example), tend to have a lot more to talk about than those who aren't in the same age range/bracket/generation, socioeconomic status, etc. So that's one thing. They can relate more to each other rather than not. This naturally results in less fighting, especially if you guys like the same things! You two can actually ENJOY the movie, music, food, etc. together instead of fighting about it! Less stress in the relationship = less chance for it to end! Less arguing too. Life's already hard enough like they say and so having someone "GET" you/understand you, is CRUCIAL in having a lasting relationship.

But with that said, I think I also read somewhere that it is also maybe MORE important that you have the BIG GOALS that align, not just the little things, even though the little things do add up! So yeah, it makes sense.

However, my experience/observation has been a tiny bit/slightly different than yours. I've seen people (of BOTH genders) try to marry/trade up! Sadly. They try to vie for the richer, when they themselves aren't as rich. The younger... the "better" one over themselves... but hey, maybe those types in the end, don't really last or go the distance in comparison to those as you've described! Anyway, great question!

LadyKitty · Accepted Answer

Well the 1st thing to think about is relatability though the other might be also to meeting this person. If you are poor, You are not gonna have the money to meet up with a rich man, Someone who is rich is not gonna suddenly go to the poor side of town to meet with anyone. If you attended college or are well educated with a job that requires higher skills then your likelyhood of meeting someone with lower education is much lower. We may have dating apps but people are gonna gravitate towards what they know or relate to best but for the other half of people who meet in real person or through friends simply aren't just gonna run into people from different backgrounds.

systemsareyo · Accepted Answer

To begin: there's always that 50 percent divorce rate regardless lol, apparently. If that stat is legit then I like how it's like all things in life, 50-50. It's also likely that such people only ever interact with people like themselves. You know. They don't travel far or they don't branch out where they don't belong or fit in. It's like creature comforts. People seem, usually, to stick to what they're familiar with versus what they know they're not going to fit into or last. Or last very long. There's always that 50 percent divorce rate don't you're forget now, apparently.

TheSpaceGnome · Accepted Answer

Because I can't stand the company of someone who isn't mentally similar to me. And because good conversation and shared hobbies, skills, and interests bring endless entertainment.

purplepoppy · Answer

Because they are the type that agree to date them in the first place. If you live in a poor neighbourhood the chance of someone from an affluent family being interested in you is very low. Same if you're fat and ugly, you're not going to land a model.

Guccigabbana18 · Answer

We tend to stick with what's similar to us because familiarity signals that that person is a safe option and that we have things in common with them (even if only a similar appearance). This implies we're therefore compatible with them.

We also have a natural instinct to preserve our genes. That's why couples tend to look similar. We want our dominant traits to carry off onto our offspring.

DarkLegacy · Answer

Well is a Christian going to marry a Muslim? No. Is a racist going to marry a equality campaigner? No. The other factor is people are going to be thrown together into these groups, so they are more likely to know people who are similar to them. especially when younger. It is the same when it comes to forming friendships, according to a YouGov poll 75% of peoples friends are from the same social class and a similar proportion of young people have friends their own age range.

LazerBean · Answer

I would think that seems like the logical thing to do. Marrying someone with very different views on life and goals as you is going to end up sucking in one way or another.

sheikalana · Answer

It's easier to live with someone that is similar to you.

Anonymous · Answer

Who are you message targeting on here with this white washing? Because this is bull and a completely a lie

Shiningtempest · Answer

I suspect people marry people similar to them is to maximize compatibility.

Redstang88 · Answer

Why wouldn’t you?

Why do people marry people similar to them?

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