Anyone else getting married in present-day 2024 (or already did) without a care about the gender wars?

[Vesuvius87]

It's happening next month. The date and time has been reserved since yesterday. I'm getting my goal accomplished, regardless of the current gender wars and negativity. Even better, it's going to be non-religious and in my Municipality (courthouse), just a couple blocks from home. It's quicker and there will be a medium party afterwards.

Anyone else still getting married, without a care about all this drama between the genders?

Updates

1 y

It's non-religious because both of us are atheists and want to have the wedding done as quickly as possible.

[Anonymous]

Congratulations! I have read enough of your posts here over the years to know that you are a good person with a good heart, and a better woman than the vast majority of today's women.

Women like you buck the trend and end up in healthy, lasting marriages, because you deserve one. I have little doubt you will make your husband happy, and he will want to make you happy, and that's what it takes to make a healthy marriage that will last.

I wish you and your fiancé the best, and I hope you will be in a position to set an example for and influence other women to be better humans.

[Vesuvius87]

Thank you very much.

[lightbulb27]

We did similar approach, married in our house… skip wedding cost and conolexity and stress and take relaxing vacation instead.


We are not athiest. Wish you both the best. Do the work to make get along, make peace, compromise and work together to be better.

[Vesuvius87]

yeah it's a lot easier and faster without the traditional, church ceremony. Thank you very much.

[V_Injector]

The gender wars are just a symptom of Democrat identity politics. People that don't eat that shit up or the people that don't deal with people that eat that shit up, are simply not going to give a shit about the liberal hierarchy of identities.

But if anybody asks... I'm a transracial and transgender that identifies as a gay black woman, and because I'm a woman that likes women... we're talking really gay. I'm trying to get 'real' women to touch my woman dick... and balls.

That's trans +2, gay +1, race card +1, and woman card +1... I win the oppression Olympics. If you think I'm retarded, that's another point for me.

[Vesuvius87]

There are too many terms nowadays.

[V_Injector]

I agree. Sometimes I wish society and the political world would stop giving me so much ammo to troll with... I really feel a lot of it (including the gender wars), is some straight up dog shit created for divide and conquer reasons amongst civilians.

On some real shit though good luck on your marriage. Next month makes 16 years for my marriage, so it looks like we'll have the same anniversary month... I guess technically starting next year. Kind of the same too... a simple courthouse marriage and we ate some food at a restaurant... TGIF's or Chili's (I don't remember). I don't agree with making a relationship become a lawful matter, but without it, the military would of split us up real quick by moving us apart.

[DevikaButts95]

These are two practically unrelated topics. This is like buying a mango at the grocery store without a care about the Pepsi vs Coke debate.

[Vesuvius87]

Good analogy. Indeed it makes sense.

[DevikaButts95]

I don't understand the point in asking this question then?

[Vesuvius87]

At some point it can be exhausting hearing the negativity about marriage and the genders. It's sad hearing the genders acting bitter towards each other.

[Alwayreckles93]

Hey I see nothing wrong if the person loves you and cares for you and vice versa I see nothing wrong.

[Vesuvius87]

Thank you

[WhitneySnow]

Congrats! I’m too young to get married but I love my boyfriend and don’t really care about gender wars either

[Vesuvius87]

Thank you. Don't worry. You still have a lot of time. It's normal to not want marriage at age 18. That's too young even for a woman. When you're older you might feel ready to settle down and form a family.

[WhitneySnow]

You’re welcome

[Apple1996]

Could care less about gender wars. Me and my husband have been married for almost 9 years

[Vesuvius87]

Great. I'm happy for you guys.

[normalice]

Most of this gender war nonsense is pushed by right wingers because they know they can't get anyone to vote for their policies - so they have created a culture war to get people to vote for that instead.

[OlderAndWiser]

I got married on April 27th!

[Vesuvius87]

Great to hear that and continue being happy in your martiage. That's my dad's birthday lol.

[OlderAndWiser]

Thanks! Good luck to you!

[Bklynbadboy12]

Being in love is a beautiful thing why would anyone be negative about you getting married and congratulations

[Vesuvius87]

Thank you and yes it's a beautiful thing. I'm going to assume those are negative people that have bad experience and take it out on others that have nothing to do with whatever happened to them.

[Bklynbadboy12]

You'd be right in assuming that. Just ignore them and live your life

[NathanDavis]

there's no such thing as gender wars around here where I live... most people are just normal, lol

[Vesuvius87]

Cool. Then it's just online here that makes it sound like the genders are at war with each other.

[NathanDavis]

yeah, and they're not fighting anybody either... just ruining themselves, lol

[Nikki1989]

We are 10 years married next week and this has never ever come up in any conversation.

[Vesuvius87]

Thank you for sharing it may you both continue being happy. I was a bit exhausted with all the negativity here.

[Nikki1989]

I know how you feel. It can be draining.

[StudyingAuthor]

Funny... my parents just celebrated their 10 years on the 2nd this month... We had a wedding at clearwater beach.

[JustinTheGreat]

I don’t even understand what you’re talking about when referring to the “gender wars” and fail to see how it would relate to your wedding

[Peridot25]

Men and women are at each other’s throats and pointing fingers at who’s the worst gender. It’s so bad where no one wants relationships anymore. Let alone marriage.

[Vesuvius87]

After a while, I got exhausted with all the negativity of the genders (esp the ones that overgeneralize a gender) and marriage was getting here.

[Vesuvius87]

@Peridot25
Pretty much it. I believe there was an older female that wanted marriage after 5 years and her boyfriend kept giving excuses. The man knew that's what she wanted from the start. Yet, a couple male posters were advising her to give up wanting marriage and compromise, be happy with what she has and how marriage is worthless, that it's the same, etc. In that case she should've left and purposely stringing along someone with false hopes of marriage is wrong. Things only work out if both are on the same page about their goals.

[JustinTheGreat]

Ahh okay I see

[HawkPerception]

I'd like to, but I don't even have a partner 😂

[Vesuvius87]

I'm sure you will find her. What you need to do first is the vetting process. This means focusing on whether both of your are compatible and have like-minded goals.

[msc545]

I hope neither of you wind up regretting this. I got married in much the same fashion and I'm here to say that I regretted it more than anything else in my life.

[Vesuvius87]

I'm sorry to hear you're having regrets about it. I just think it would be hypocritical doing the traditional, church ceremony since we're atheists. We're making the commitment to each other and it can be just as special without religion.

[Vegasrunner]

There's nothing in it for men to choose marriage. This post simply validates how important it is for women.

[Vesuvius87]

We're proceeding without a care, away from negativity. My two past bfs wouldn't give me commitment (keeping me just as girlfriend... so I got out of the station going nowhere) but my 3rd one did. You know what they say, the 3rd time is the charm.
Sure less people are getting married but it's still happening.

[Vegasrunner]

@Vesuvius87 Yes, my point is that it is great for you, but there's a reason we don't see your man posting about his upcoming nuptials. In his head he's given up.

[Anonymous]

I doubt I'm ever getting married so I don't worry about it. Nor the gender wars either.

One thing I would NEVER do is marry an atheist though.

[Vesuvius87]

Some people just aren't into marriage and others are. I think the most important thing is finding someone compatible. If someone doesn't want marriage then they need a partner that doesn't want that either. Both would have to be on the same page.
My case is easy because we both wanted marriage, he's just as excited as me and we're both atheist; so therefore like-minded.

[OhLongJohnsoning]

I don't want marriage. I don't think it's necessary. And is a religious cultish ceremony, meant to control

[Vesuvius87]

It's always been optional to get married. It's ok not to want marriage. What's important is finding someone that's on your same page.
As for religious, my wedding will be non-religious at a courthouse; a civil marriage. Both of us are atheists.

[OhLongJohnsoning]

That's the point though, marriage IS a religious cult

[Anonymous]

Is this for a green card?

[Vesuvius87]

It's for lifetime commitment and be with him. Though I would have to relocate to his place after our marriage.

[Jamie05rhs]

When did you meet this guy?

[Vesuvius87]

On FB and then in person last Nov.

[Jamie05rhs]

Okay. That's cool.

... But 9 months? You sure that's enough time to make a lifelong commitment to someone?

[Vesuvius87]

Yup. Prior to meeting in person (Nov 2023) and spending quality time together, we were already chatting every day since Jan 2023.
One of my mother's friend also got married in a short time. They became engaged after just 7 months of being boyfriend and girlfriend, then married shortly afterwards. Every case is different. While some people can be together for years and not ready, others are ready faster.