Do you think married people are usually happier?

[Anonymous]

There has been a lot of negativity to marriage. "I'd rather be single than to be in a toxic relationship" or "nobody needs marriage nowadays".

But in all honesty, I think folks in a mediocre marriage is happier than being single and all alone. Every marriage has its own problems but when you are married, even in a mediocre marriage, you have support/companionship/love/ care/ sex/ affection, financial stability, paying less taxes

When you are single, you have no one. You handle all of life's challenges and obstacles alone. And of course you will be poorer

[Summeroflove]

The answer is that it depends. Single people are happier having peace then being in a miserable marriage. Many marriages end miserably…. Many people rush marriage too fast, marry for the wrong reasons, etc. Mediocre marriage I can see your point but most of the time it’s downhill from there from what I’ve noticed.

The good news in a mediocre marriage if BOTH people are willing to put the work in then yes it can get stronger.

Also, I know people that are broke in marriages because their wife or husband cannot manage money and BLOWS it like no tomorrow. The second income doesn’t make a difference assuming they work at all. They blow your money and theirs….. they can’t manage, save, or invest money.

I live by the philosophy that…. I don’t want to ever need marriage. I want to want it. I want to marry someone because she’s my best friend. Because we have a bond. We have a lot in common. We genuinely know one another and don’t have a fantasy in one another’s heads just to be severely disappointed later down the road.

But I don’t want to marry out of desperation. Marry someone maybe I’m not even that attracted to. Most people who marry for those reasons divorce. Because they want to find someone else…. Many times they have affairs. You can choose to stay loyal and married…. But they may not choose to.

[Summeroflove]

I mean really. I could marry someone for superficial and meterliaric reasons. I could stay married even if she has affairs, is abusive, blows my money, etc. At the end of the day she could leave and divorce me.

Same for me…. Hypothetically I could marry for the benefits. Make a woman sign all her rights away with zero rotecriosn for herself in a prenump. Have kids… and one day POOOF….

Even if she stays loyal and married.

[Summeroflove]

And there’s the issue…. People leave. People screw people over

[RespectfulGuy]

I'm married. This is my opinion:

Being married is just that, acquiring a piece of paper from the legal department.

STAYING in the marriage is what brings contentment. Yes, this means overcoming challenges and exercising various traits ranging from willingness to forgive, be forgiven, to give, to take, to love and be loved, to finding ways to own your first house and car to having your first child.

And many more.

STAYING in the marriage is what brings happiness. It ranges from going together to a cheap vacation, eat cheap street food, to getting naughty indoors and outdoors, to co-hosting expensive weddings for your kids.

Yes, it's easy to get married and easier to add a prenup, planning for a divorce before it even starts.

But STAYING in the marriage without thought of divorcing is what counts. That's what brings happiness and contentment.

[Nikki1989]

Studies constantly find that married adults report higher life satisfaction and better health than single adults.

I know that almost everyone I know who is married is very happy.

[desidoll]

Not necessarily, but I do notice most of my single girl friends (middle age) tend to be a little nastier as they get older. Maybe it is just a coincidence, I don’t know.

[OlderAndWiser]

It is quite popular to bash marriage. . . especially among those who can't find a suitable partner. "The grapes are all sour!"

[aceleon]

i bash marriage because i hate the things it brings, responsiblity, expectations and patience.

[OlderAndWiser]

That doesn’t mean that it isn’t good for other people.

[Orion84]

I think people in good marriages, with good spouses, are probably the happiest people of all.

Next would be single people, even single and lonely.

Third/last would be people in bad marriages, with bad spouses; they are probably the most miserable of all.

I've never been married, but I've been in long term relationships before, and I've never been happier than when a relationship is going well, and I've never been more miserable than when in a bad relationship.

I'm single, now, and prefer to stay that way. I'm happier, now, than I was for the last couple of years with my ex. I also have more money, since I'm only supporting myself.

[Asker]

Married couples tend to have more money. Lower taxes, dual income households. Sounds like you just picked a loser

[HighValue]

Married women are often happier, but married men are often NOT happy at all.

Most men do not get love, support, care, affection, or financial stability from marriage.

Women benefit greatly from marriage, men do not. Men are actually often harmed by marriage.

Also married then divorced men don't live as long because their exes often cause lots of stress and hardship, BUT single men that didn't et married live longer because they have significantly less stress in life. Women are the problem in relationships, including same sex relationships. Statistics (records of what actually happened IRL, not wishful thinking and delusions) backs that up.

[Asker]

Studies show married men live longer than single men but married women don't live longer than single women

[slatyb]

No, I don't. I read once that the happiest people are married men and single women, but there are plenty of unhappily married men and happily married women. I was miserable in my first marriage but am now happy in my second. Marriage works better when one's partner is not a sociopath.

[Asker]

Who told u to pick a sociopath?

[slatyb]

Why does anyone marry an abusive partner?

[MrChinaski]

My read of the science is that married people are happier than single people, but that a majority of the difference is due to underlying differences between groups that are not due to marriage (prevalence of anxiety, depression, neuroticism is higher among single people; poorer mental health -> lower happiness) and a minority is due to the act of coupling/marrying. I think that's a correct interpretation of the data, anyway. It seems plausible to me.

[Asker]

When you are single nobody is there for you. Nobody loves you and nobody cares about you. No sex. No affection. Doing everything alone. Nobody defends you. Nobody cares

[MrChinaski]

I feel you. Recently single too.

[WhitneySnow]

I’m not sure that’s true. There are plenty of unhappy marriages and happy single people, not to mention all the people in non marital relationships (boyfriend and girlfriend being the most common). You really can’t generalize.

[Asker]

Can't really generalize?

When you are single nobody is there for you. Nobody loves you and nobody cares about you. No sex. No affection. Doing everything alone. Nobody defends you. Nobody cares

[WhitneySnow]

That’s not true. You have friends. They can give you affection. They can defend you. You can even have sex with them if they’re willing and that doesn’t offend your moral code.

[Anonymous]

Don't listen to immature, bitter people who use your question just to take a jab at the opposite sex. @imjustagirl1520

Studies consistently show that married people of both sexes are MUCH happier than their single counterparts. That is true today and has been for many decades.

[Asker]

Studies show married men live longer than single men but married women don't live longer than single women

[Opinion Owner]

The studies you're referring to are very outdated and do not reflect the current reality. To know how long someone will live, you have to wait until they die (duh, right?). So by necessity, those studies are based on older couples who got married during a very different time when marriage, and life itself, were vastly different than today. When the same studies are done 30 years from now, the outcomes will be very different.

Keep in mind too that the studies grouped men who have been married and subsequently divorced into the single men group, and that group is VERY substantial in size. Divorced men commit suicide at 5 times the rate of married men. Keep in mind here that half of marriages end in divorce, and women initiate 80% of divorces. If those studies grouped divorced men in the married group, the statistics would show the opposite of what you quoted.

[Asker]

@opinion owner

No, they represent present day couples. Single women tend to be healthier than married women cuz marriage takes a bigger toll on women than men.

[Opinion Owner]

How do they know how long "present day" couple will live, hmm? Use your brain, child.

All of this information is available if you want to take the time to inform yourself.

[aceleon]

nothing you mentioned are things you can't acquire without selling your freedom to someone.

[Asker]

It's an trade off. Pay 100 bucks to get your taxes done so you end up with a 1000 dollar refund

[aceleon]

umm no, it is pay 1000 bucks so you MAY OR MAY NOT get a 100 dollar refund but be aware that your refund will decrease until it is merely 10 dollars or so.

[Asker]

@aceleon

Definitely doesn't take 1000 to do a tax return

[aceleon]

oh sorry i thought we were talking metaphorical like you pay a small cost in your life for marriage for a greater life.
i'm not good with paperwork stuff, i don't pay taxes since i am a student and live with my folks (and hopefully will never have to until i get wrinkly and white since i have no interest in leaving)

[Asker]

@aceleon

Have u ever thought about what's gonna happen to you once your folks are dead? Are u gonna be all alone and nobody cares about u?

[aceleon]

good point but incredibly flawed in many sense:
1- do you assume that i won't have any friends or relatives? because if the only person in your life is your wife it is the saddest life i can imagine.
2- i also assume that i won't feel lonely just because i have a wife, but here is the thing, the kind of bond i ever wanted in my life was never this, the idea of love never made me feel less lonely when i ever felt alone, it doesn't cover for the gap i have inside when i feel lonely.
3- you also assume my oh so dear wife will actually care about me, or i will care about her caring about me, sadly though you should realize by now that i really lack what some people call a romantic bone. just like every hetero guy i feel attracted to woman too but i'm like a dog that chases cars, i don't know why am i even chasing, to be shorter when it comes to woman i have no long term sense, run, fetch, eat, rinse and repeat.
so you see, even though i don't wanna be alone like no one does, the one i want care from is not a woman so marriage can't fill my loneliness, worse it will shorten the time i have left with my folks since i will be living with her instead of them.
you might want to consider the option that i might be an aromantic even though i don't know if i am (and if you wanna suggest that you don't have to romanticly love her and can just be good friends who are co-parenting and having sex, well it is kind of more close but still, isn't it sad that i use someone's love for not feeling alone?)
to be honest, is it worth being with someone just because you are afraid of being lonely all together? this is not love this is taking advantage of someone which is something i am not above to be honest but still... is it even worth being this cruel for that long? i never thought i was a good person but this is cold even for someone like me.

[aceleon]

oops, i write it too long
long story short: romance doesn't make me feel less lonely, i have no feelings toward romance or partnered love, i suspect i might be aromantic but not sure, i also think it is a waste spending the time i could had with my folks with spending with a person i likely won't ever love more than as a friend and i find using someone's love to not feel lonely as cruel even though i am not a good person.

[Asker]

because your relatives won't' be there for you. No relative will care for you like a wife would. Your siblings will get married, have kids as they get older, leaving no time for you. Or your siblings might move away

[Asker]

humans are designed to be social animals, to crave affection, community and to be loved.

[aceleon]

i do agree that we are social animals, what i don't agree is that no male animal that ever existed including us is monogamous but that's not even my point.
do you remember the part that: ''romance doesn't make me feel less lonely, i have no feelings toward romance or partnered love, i suspect i might be aromantic but not sure, i also think it is a waste spending the time i could had with my folks with spending with a person i likely won't ever love more than as a friend and i find using someone's love to not feel lonely as cruel even though i am not a good person''?

[queenofcardio]

My married coworkers always complain about their spouses. You can still feel single in a marriage if there's no support

[Hagar88]

Absolutely

[beenherebefore]

I don't know about other couples but I'm really happy in my marriage and love being married.

[Imjustagirl1520]

Studies actually show that married men r happier while single women r happier

[jahaims]

Emotionally healthy people are happier. It has nothing to do with a relationship

[CuriousMufuxka]

Never really wondered before. I do know that we all have some sort of baggage.

[abc3643]

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

[DryGermanGuy]

„Happy wife - happy life.“
- Modern proverb

[exitseven]

I think most of them are.

[Staximus]

That depends on the couple in question

[Mike_Hum]

Most all studies agree they are.

[beefcakebradybatson]

Generally, I'd say yes.

[Bloodparadise]

That's a hellhole..

[Anonymous]

Not always.

[dudeinohio]

I agree with you.

[MasterKS]

mostly opposite.