Why I'm Not as Confident as I Used to Be

ragequeen

Everyone has insecurities. Nobody is perfect. We are all different. These words of comfort are engraved into our minds starting from a young age. It is simply because humans are exposed to hard pressure from all corners of the world. I hope you will find this MyTake useful, and please try to do something about it if you are feeling the way I am!

1. School is about what you can't do

I've felt this way since I started high school. In Norwegian school, we don't get grades until 8th grade. Since I am a hard working student from an educated family, I'm always trying to be my best. I feel very insecure if I hear someone doing a lot better than me. I just feel really unsuccessful. I know it's stupid!

Why I'm Not as Confident as I Used to Be

2. I've always had few to no quality friends

I think I`ve had two good friends since the beginning of time. People I hung out with before ended up leaving or tried to change me. I've been hurt, left behind, played and rejected. False rumors about me have been spread a lot. I tend to be very selective about my friends, too, and that made things difficult.

Why I'm Not as Confident as I Used to Be

3. Boys through the times haven't treated me well

When I was twelve, I was molested by a teenage kid. My ex-boyfriend was possessive, and guy friends rarely respected me.

4. I have social anxiety

Getting to know people is a pretty big deal to me. It's hard for me to approach people and talk in a huge group of people I don't know. Because of this, I feel like a huge joke and no one deserves to talk like an awkward person like myself!

Why I'm Not as Confident as I Used to Be

5. Sometimes I think no one has problems

I see pretty girls everywhere and I immediately think they have no problems. This makes me really sad about myself because I am fighting hard against low self-esteem.

Why I'm Not as Confident as I Used to Be

6. I'm scared to lose people

The few "friends" I have, I am afraid to lose. Even the ones who are toxic. My biggest fear is to be alone.

Anyways, this took a lot of guts to write. I'm usually very insecure about my low self-esteem, and I'm trying my best to hide it. I'm doing okay, and I'm trying to fix it a step at a time. Hope you guys enjoyed!

Why I'm Not as Confident as I Used to Be
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