So, how did you do that then?

[purplepoppy]

A French man has been admitted to hospital with an artillery shell stuck up his bum
www.dailymail.co.uk/.../...shell-stuck-rectum.html

This raises the obvious question, why do they make shells that shape if you're not supposed to put them up your bum? (Sex bomb)

Of course getting things stuck up there is a common occurance, Doctors call it “the Eiffel Syndrome” because it was always the same story, as in
“How did that get up there”?
“I fell on it”!

BUT. The question I want to ask is, HAVE YOU EVER LIED ABOUT HOW YOU GOT AN INJURY?

[Anonymous]

From a certain perspective it can be said that it is the ocean that designs ships.

The designs which are successful are repeated, those which fail do not make it back to shore.

Over time all ships end up looking similar, there are certain characteristics which are required by the environment.

And so it is with shells and penises, they must both penetrate, one the air at great speed and the other a dry and unwilling vagina, because nature doesn't care about rape.

Got a little darker than necessary at the end there, its all true though.

[Reece12345]

Not sure if this qualifies as an injury, but the closest thing to an injury that I felt I had to lie about.

When I was a teenager I masturbated all the time. My penis got kind of red and a little inflamed.

My mom took me to our doctor for our twice yearly checkup. My doctor looked at everything, and when she asked me about my penis, I told her it was a rash and I'd been scratching it.

I'm pretty sure she knew the truth, lol. So embarrassed.

[Midgetmcwidget]

I went straight to the comments on the link, they didn't disappoint.

[MrOracle]

I get injured way too often to bother lying about it. Especially in the summer, when it's too hot to wear long pants - I get cut and scraped by plants and fences from working in people's yards. My hands and arms get pokes and torn from crawling in attics or on sharp edges on equipment or when a tool slips.

Most of the time I don't even notice until I see blood. It's just part of the job.

[Lliam]

My dad worked with a guy who drove a camper to work and went out to it during lunch time. One day, he apparently got a ketchup bottle stuck in his ass and an ambulance had to take him to the hospital to get it removed.
He said he accidentally sat on the bottle when he sat down after taking a shower. Simple mistake. LOL 🤣🤣🤣

[exitseven]

I know a lot of paramedics and I have been told that lots of people have had those skinny beer bottles stuck up there.

[purplepoppy]

Apparently Britvic is the most common here

[exitseven]

Is that beer?

[purplepoppy]

Soft drinks and mixers. They come in narrow bottles. Usually only bought in bars so I guess alcohol is involved

[exitseven]

We call these bar bottles. They are made of very thick glass and they are returnable.

[bean2k21]

For decades, we've been hearing about terrorist attacks in France. It's so obvious now that it was old Frenchmen having butt sex with artillery shells. Hindsight is 20/20.

[AviatorTom]

I've been fortunate in that I've never been seriously injured, so no need to lie about an injury.

[NathanDavis]

a couple of times I've pulled muscle lol... and when some people notice and ask about the discomfort, I do say it is from sports... lol

[SnowedIn]

I have never lied about an injury. Or had a mortar shell up my bum.

[Surely]

I have heard that doctors have removed 💡light bulbs and 🐹 gerbils from people’s butts! Can’t imagine the gerbils!

[nawtee_me]

It has not been there since the war has it?

[UrAnus89]

It's like asking why do they make sex toys, if you can just get the real thing? It's all about the dough ($)

[Jennz6]

I’m curious about it too

[jimmy2]

Lol not for me