Are you a clean person and keep your living quarters clean, but you live with a complete slob and it's driving you crazy?

[sage2021]

I don't like waking up everyday and instantly get in a bad mood because someone leaves their mess everywhere I look. Then I am the nag and I don't want to be a nag either. It is changing my whole personality into someone I am not! It's not fair to me and I refuse to clean someone else's mess. I am actually depressed because of this! What are your thoughts?

[Lliam]

This is a sore subject for me.
My wife sets things down right where she is when she is done with them, rather than putting them back where they belong. I swear, I don't think she ever had to clean up after herself when she was a kid.

For example, she'll leave dirty utensils on the kitchen counter and let what's on them dry so that hard scrubbing is required to get them clean, when it would be simple to rinse them off them off as she goes and save time and energy later. The faucet is right there.
It particularly bothered me when she did that with our good kitchen knives. After years of complaining, she started rinsing the knives and setting them on the counter wet, right next to the knife block. I explained that leaving the knives wet was the fastest way to dull their blades. But she still does it. Then she gets defensive when I say anything. Her excuse is always "I was busy." Too busy to take five seconds to wipe the blade with a towel that's right there and put the knife back in the block?

Also, she sets things down on the kitchen counters, dining table and other places - where there is any empty space - including in our bedroom office, laundry room and spare bedroom. They become storage rooms for her stuff.
She organizes and puts stuff away eventually, but only when she gets the notion. And, at that point, it's a lot of work.
I don't put her stuff away because I don't know where she wants to put it, but I also don't want to enable her habits by cleaning up after her.

Where her habits also drive me nuts is when I can't find a tool like scissors, nail clippers, or a screw driver or something after she uses it and doesn't put it back.
And gardening tools get destroyed because she leaves them where she was when she finished with them instead of putting them away out of the sun and weather.

I don't want to sound like she doesn't work hard. When she does clear up her stuff, she does a really good job. I just don't understand why she doesn't realize how much extra work her habits create.

I do the laundry and a most of the dishes. I empty all of our trash cans in the house and take out the garbage. I clean up after myself and do lots of other things around the house.

She does LOTS around the house. She's a whirlwind. And we often work as a team.

I'm just complaining about her really bad habit of not putting things away. I find it to be crazymaking. And with her mind always spinning with thoughts, it seems impossible for her to slow down and be in the moment.

[sage2021]

@Lliam
That's exactly what I am talking about! It is driving me insane! If I mention it to him he replies "Am I on trial again"?
It's been exactly one year since he moved in. But I don't want to spend my old age in a messy place to live.
He always has trash of some kind and a trash can close by, but he puts empty soda cans in the kitchen sink instead of the trashcan.
He has ADHD but confessed he just has bad habits and will try harder to be cleaner. We will see! 🤪

[Fuentes]

I hate dirty people, all my stuff is organized and put in a way I can find it all and very thing is clean I hate pll who. leave food on the stove after cooking, don't clean up the bathroom or anything. I am like Danny Turner

[Fuentes]

Danny Tanner**

[sage2021]

@Fuentes
That reminds me. After he moved in here and I would be asleep at night, he went through EVERYTHING of mine and reorganized all of my important papers in an order he liked and I haven't been able to undo the mess he made. I can't function like the way he put them. I kinda straightened them one but he messed them up again. Weird!!

[Fuentes]

He needs a beat down lol

[sage2021]

@Fuentes
Yeah, right

[TrueConfection]

Yes to all parts of your question. It admonishes me at times how a grown person can leave a trail in a matter of seconds.

[sage2021]

@TrueConfection
Mine doesn't just leave a trail. No! That would turn me into Bride Zilla. I'm seeing empty soda cans everywhere except in the trash cans. Same with empty water bottles. Piles of clothes on the hallway chair and in the bathroom. I could go on and on, because he is a very nice guy, and so nice to me too. It's this one bad habit, which makes me go sideways. GRRRR! ♥️

[TrueConfection]

I feel your pain Sage! Every time I clean up a dump zone (hallway, stairs, corner of the room) it's reloaded within minutes of his arrival. It's like he sees every empty spot as a place to put something.

[sage2021]

@TrueConfection
Exactly❣️

[Anonymous]

I feel for you! My new tal health is messed up if I have a roommate in general. I would keep dishes in my room, one of each thing - clean! So this way I always had something clean I could use when I needed. Ultimately I refuse to have a roommate. Even if the stress of paying more is happening. The stress of making more money for my own place is far more manageable than having a roommate

[blissinanarchy1]

When I lived with my dad I was pissed. His personal hygiene was terrible. He’d take a shit, not wash his hands, touch food, then gaslight me as OCD for not liking it

[FunkyMonkee]

No, I'm all by my lonesome. No slobs here. It may be a little cluttered here and there but it's organized chaos. I know where just about everything is.

[AsaKyo]

Yes, I live with three disgusting slobs, which makes keeping the house clean a challenge

[CAPTAIN-OBVIOUS]

What I do is put their mess in the oven or misplace their mess while I’m cleaning. I purposely put stuff in bad spots. I’ll put their stuff underneath a dusty desk in the living room or something like that.

[sage2021]

@CAPTAUN_OBVIOUS
The freezer is a good place to hide their stuff if it's wrapped up in tin foil they'll never find it.
I just hate the mind games too. TIt for tat.

[Rangers]

I don't have time nor the energy to sort things out or clean, so I don't

Even if I did have time and energy, I'd spend it trying to do something I enjoy instead, cause I'm tired of waking up every day knowing damn well there's no joy to be had

[sheikalana]

I've experienced this. I'm a clean and organized person. Years ago I shared a flat with a very messy woman luckily she decided to leave and now I live on my own.

[art84]

I clean my own dishes, room, toilet and family members like nephews. I kinda hate it cause the house is literally always a mess like clothes on floor and laundry basket full. I don't nag but my mom does if something is a mess.

[BCRanger10]

No, my wife and I both like to keep our living spaces clean and orderly.

[NathanDavis]

I would spray them with a hose every single time they do it...

[Likes2drive]

It’s like living with young kids because that’s how mine used to be till they got on their own. Time to find a new roommate, if you don’t want to keep telling them to clean up after themselves.

[Vegasrunner]

This drives me crazy and has led me to limit the time I allow some women to stay over my house.

[Anonymous]

I don't mind a mess like stuff here and there, but it has to be hygienic and clean.

[Sparkie460]

Yes my wife and I are neat and my kids are slobs. You can't even walk in my sons room

[Andres77]

I need a clean house, or I can’t function

[exitseven]

No, I am pretty neat and so is my wife.

[shades777]

I imagine that would be annoying

[Kelly6]

Very clean person