What is the funniest joke you have ever heard? Please share?

[Anonymous]

[Wallythewalrus]

A young man was having a pharmacist help him get condoms. He was telling the pharmacist that he was meeting his girlfriend's parents for the first time over dinner and was expecting to get "lucky" later that night. He bought the condoms and left. He showed up at his girlfriend's house for dinner, sat down and said, "please, let me say grace". He proceeded to give thanks for sharing an amazing dinner among his new friends and gave thanks for "this amazing woman that entered my life. A woman that I respect more than anything". As a finished, his girlfriend gave him a kiss on his cheek and whispered, "I had no idea you were so religious", he turned to her and whispered, "I had no idea your dad was a pharmacist".

[KostasKouvalis]

"If only Africa had more mosquito nets, then each year we could save millions of mosquitos, from dieing needlessly of AIDS"

- The Great Jimmy Carr