I hate the words ''I love you'', is my hatred towards it normal?

[Vesuvius87]

Someone I've never even met in person and only chatted for 2 days started saying ''I love you from the first day I saw you on facebook''. My brain immediately activated the scammer alert and I blocked him.

I've developed a hatred for that simple phrase. If it's not coming from my family, I won't listen to it. I actually hate hearing those words. I'm disgusted by them. In fact, I now take it as a direct insult towards my intelligence. Yes I have negative reaction towards that 3-word sentence.

Updates

+1 y

I swear if I hear the L word one more time, I'm going to go crazy. I imagine these replies:
Ok what's the catch?
What do you want, sex or money or both?

[Saiesh30]

I get you. Over the years the phrase, "I love you" has actually lost it's essence. These days it's more of a pick up line than something that expresses a pure feeling towards someone.
Especially over Facebook, within two days! That's more of a joke than to believe he fell for you as soon as he saw you.
Annoying is okay but you shouldn't get angry. That's my opinion. ✌🏻

[Vesuvius87]

Then the real joke is when a man wastes my time, says he loves me very much and will do anything for me, anything but marriage lol. He loves me but doesn't want something permanent, just a girlfriend... lol.. then don't tell me you love me.

[Saiesh30]

Lol that's true indeed. I love you but as a girlfriend 😅 How we've just started playing with words to get our motives is so lame

[Vesuvius87]

Exactly. Since they can't directly say "I just want to date and have free access to unlimited sex aka friends with benefits, casual relationship", they lied and switched their wording to wanting a serious relationship leading towards commitment, the words many women want to hear.

[Saiesh30]

Rightly so! Just how it is sadly.

[Saiesh30]

Oh thanks for the MHO 😇

[Bklynbadboy12]

Why do you hate it so much? Why do you think only your family can love you? And not that's not normal you might need to talk to someone cause it seem like there is something more going on

[Vesuvius87]

Too many men just want a girlfriend but not marriage. At least my family is permanent.

[Bklynbadboy12]

Not all I'd love to get married just have to find the right woman

[Vesuvius87]

I wish you luck and hopefully you find her.

[Bklynbadboy12]

Thanks you and I wish for you the same

[Bklynbadboy12]

Thanks for the MHO

[lightbulb27]

yes. nothing wrong with questioning it, you really gotta be confident in your judgement of them and strength.

you don't trust, you are healing from some prior hurts. Above all that is strength so that you can feel ok with words and take the good from them.

[Vesuvius87]

Yes the damage was done and it's seared into my memory. I was once a young, naivee girl that had dreams of marriage and kids like most women have. Now my fertile years are almost over and I'm currently back to see a psychologist.

[lightbulb27]

I know women whove had kids at 37 and one having kid at 47. it's not over, but definitely time to heal from the trauma.
If you want help, reach out. I found, once I understood, I gained power over the wound. That takes away the fear, and enabled me to move forward.
I was too late though to have kids as well, but is ok, married and doing well.

[NathanDavis]

having grown up with Spanish as well...

I do understand how it feels when people just throw the "love" word like it's nothing, lol...

and how much more "sacred" and meaningful those words are in Spanish... so I understanding but maybe your reaction is a bit too much

[Vesuvius87]

I've been lovebombed too much by two fake "serious bfs". Those are the idiots that "loved" the woman so much, she's the "love of his life" and would do anything for her... anything except propose and marry her lol. Oh the love her so much but just as a girlfriend lol..

[NathanDavis]

Easy to skip and quicker too, lol

[katiesmuff]

I agree with you! I only want "I Love You" from my family or maybe a few very very lifetime friends which I do have. Those words are used way to freely these days in places where it has no real meaning.

[Vesuvius87]

Indeed. If someone saying ''I love you'' can walk away from your life at any moment then those words mean nothing. The only way I would believe a man's ''I love you'' words is through a marriage proposal and a date set up for the wedding. Then he can say his ''I love you'' all he wants.

[Vesuvius87]

Too many men say that and only want a girlfriend, lol. I wish they would just stop saying the L word if they don't ever want to permanently commit to the woman.

[ArrowheadSW]

I definitely see your point if it is used in such a wreckless manner!

[Vesuvius87]

yeah.. I hate it when people loosely throw the L word; esp people that come and go, people that won't be there permanently.

[boggboss]

So u wpuldnt want your partner to tell you they loved u?

[Vesuvius87]

Not if they don't ever plan on permanently committing to me, aka marriage. Talk is cheap. Putting me on the girlfriend zone, saying ''I love you'' but not giving me commitment isn't a commitment.

[boggboss]

What are u talking about I said partner that could mean husband I'm asking if u would want your long term partner saying this I never said a guy who was playing u lol

[boggboss]

Its pretty clear your hatred for the word is based on poor expiranes in the past with people love bombing you only thing that now confuses me is you would marry someone before u are comfortable with them saying they love u

[boggboss]

Also how is marriage the factor for being permanent when you can get a divorce?

[Vesuvius87]

If it's from a fiance (with the wedding date placed) or he's my husband then yes he can say it all he wants to.

[boggboss]

So u wpuld accept a proposal from a guy that has never said he loved u intresting

[Vesuvius87]

I know and it's sad how some people make it out to be a joke. Something serious that includes signing documents and making marital vows (religious or not... I'm atheist but would you can have your own vows without a church nor a god included).
Honestly I think divorce should be reserved for serious things such as abuse or infidelity, for something major. Otherwise I believe people should work things out and accept their flaws. Marriage isn't dating that you can break-up easily after an argument or if they snore too loud or do a bad prank on you... nope.

[Vesuvius87]

Yes I would. Actions speak louder than words.

[boggboss]

Fair enough if that's how u view it but most dint view it that way and will divorce over smaller things like they are allowed too

[OddBeMe]

Some of us are squeamish of emotional words like that. I wouldn’t worry. But I’d learn to fake it. I took acting classes to appear not so robotic.

[Vesuvius87]

Glad to hear I'm not the only one feeling disgusted over those words. Like posted on my updated, if I hear another ''I love you'' and it's not from my family I'm going to scream in anger and puke (figuratively speaking); I can't stand those words anymore.

[FenixG45]

Ya, L word bothers me too!

[Vesuvius87]

Yeah. Nowadays people say it for the sake of saying. It lost its original value. Long ago, a serious boyfriend (not the casual, serial cohabitor) would say that to the woman he was planning to then marry the next day.

[FenixG45]

The word now frightens me cuz I always get disappointed when I say it.

[Anonymous]

😆😆😆

[Vesuvius87]

What's so funny about that?

[Lieutenant00]

Weird

[Vesuvius87]

Too many say that loosely and don't plan on being permanent with you.