Are morals for unhappy people?

Question

Once a close friend of mine told me of a morally wrong thing she’s done but she was happy about that even though there was the feeling of guilt.

I told “It’s okay. Morals are for unhappy people anyway.”

Philosophically speaking, they are. Would you agree?

docyoks · Accepted Answer

i think immoral people are just trying to break rules for the thrill and own amusement. that comes in all sort of a sense of entitlement, feeling superior and reckless selfish behaviour, like doing drugs, masturbating, cheating, lying, hurting, manipulating, gaslighting, resentment, vindictive desire.

This kind of people are so dirty they get disgusted with how much evil they can get, when they are truly obsessed with something, like jealousy, self-atention, accountability, geting mad at someone else flaws or looks.

Believe me, i'm not attacking immoral people, we are exactly like this and very self-absorved, feeling undervalued by others, deflecting critics and always believing that we're right.

I'm very immoral, at last my true view: NO, doesn't make me happy, i've tried breaking rules, cheating, lying, stealing, never had but would easily try gay sex, trans, gangbangs, dominating. Would impregnate strangers. It's not that i'm fixated on any of this, i just would do it because why not?

I've tried feeling good feelings, ended up not having true self, beliefs, satisfaction, self-esteem, get anxious because i lack identity, goals, dreams, love for others, self respect, accountability, patience, empathy and most of all: happiness.

Im trully depressed, not kidding. But I regret nothing, this is the real me. I'm not "actually a good person inside", i'm a piece of shit and i know it, at least i dont keep saying "I don't know why I cheated, i was confused, on coke, i just felt sad baby, but i love you".

I just say: " i was seeking a crumble of relief, im shitty, and did not respected the agreement, i would like to turn back to being normal, but i like more being this piece of shait, if you want we could still fuck, lets be friends, dont take so heavily" and laugh.

Not proud, really, but how could i respect the other, if i dont respect not even what I feel is right? myself from the past used to have a lot of beliefs, today i dont believe in nothing, none, nada.

CaptainOverthink · Accepted Answer

I think immoral acts can reinforce short-term happiness if they're in their own selfish, best interests.
Though longterm I think they open up for some bad habits that can really lead down unhappy paths. I think a habit of immoral acts is a slippery slope and even if great things can happen they it's probable they will self-sabotage in order to take the easy way out or just end up missing out on the things that are born out of work and patience.

Though, ofc, there are no perfect recepies for happiness. Because anyone can change at any time no matter the path taken and happiness is subjective.

But generally I think things that gives plenty of longterm purpose, like family, kids, longterm relationships, ikigai and such that takes true, honest, hardworking effort is what will bring the lasting happiness which will sustain people on their last days. When lifes meaning becomes more imortant and we're only as important as we're allowed to be by those who choose to stay by our side in bad health and old age.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

That is the weirdest conclusion I've heard of in a while. There are tons of immoral people currently in prison, and I don't see them smiling. You also mention your friend feels guilt---if she were so happy about what she's done, then she wouldn't feel guilty. Those people who TRULY take pleasure in their immorality are usually sadistic or egomaniacal individuals who feel nothing for others and don't care about who they hurt. Lucky for your friend, she still feels something otherwise, I'd be questioning if it's a good idea to still be friends with someone who literally didn't give a damn who she hurt "as long as she was happy."

DishLady · Accepted Answer

No... Since ancient times the measure for happiness was considered to be the fulfillment of a balanced, moral life... While in some circumstances we have to make tough decisions that veer a little on the edge between moral and immoral, the goal should always be the path to a "good life." Go read a book, man...

sawno · Answer

I'm sure thats what a psychopath would agree with. But most people would not be happy when they betrayed the value of their soul. Its how you can destroy the very essence of who you are, by getting numb to the pain of doing so.

If you are a person who lives with integrity you have absolutely no problem living by your own morals and you will be happy as a result.

As an example because I listen to my moral compass I became the purest version of myself since my soul dictates what I love and what my morals are. So I am happy because of it, not despite of it. I am aligned with who I truly am.

If I were to disobey that i'd loose myself completely and i'd have to face the pain of the fact people could take everything from me including the essence of who I am. I'd be a destroyed mess corrupted by evil, and i'd also no longer be aligned with the kind of partner I would love.

So no, philosophically this is completely wrong to me. And if your tempted to explore that path don't. You will not enjoy the outcome.

b_lova · Answer

No, morals actually provide a boundary to ensure happiness. Most people who want to break those morals or values think they may have more fun but the reality is, often they don't.

For instance if we compare Single and sleeping around versus Marriage and monogamy.

Single and sleeping around means you have to find sexual partners versus having one next to you all the time.
Single and sleeping around means you need regular testing for STIs versus married and not needing testing because you already know what diseases exist. And let's not forget the issues if you get one.
Single and sleeping around means you probably get less sex than a married couple who are willing to fulfill each others needs. Studies have proven this as fact.
Single and sleeping around means you don't know how good the sex will be and have to guess if/learn what will feel good with a new partner whereas hopefully if I am sleeping with the same person I have paid attention and learned what to do to please them and myself.
The only advantage to Single and sleeping around in my mind is that they get variety.

The advantages to being partnered out weigh being singled to me when it comes time to do the do. Sure you have to compromise and learn to accept the other person in a couple but to me that is just a part of growing up.

Anyway we could go down the list of moral v amoral actions one could take and you will probably see who has the most fun over time. While moral people may miss out on some excitement. Over the course of their lives they live better and hopefully are less miserable.

Anonymous · Answer

That's because people who are genuinely immoral are either ignorant enough not to realize the harm they do, or don't feel any guilt over it, which is often part of a mental condition like narcissistic personality disorder. If you are neither of these things, then being immoral probably won't make you happy.

I feel like you may simply be cherry-picking some of the the examples of the truly immoral living great lives and ignoring what I would say is an overwhelming majority of them who seem to be lonely, ostracized, dysfunctional, angry, unhappy people. It's just that those people don't become famous so you don't read about them.

There is also no shortage of books written by reformed crooks, criminals, and gangsters that tell stories about how miserable they were living those lifestyles and how they managed to, and how thankful they were to, escape.

Ultimately happiness is a state of mind. There is no set formula you get where you plug in some variables and the result is happiness. Some people get pleasure from helping others, some get enjoyment out of cause others pain.

Purpleronnie · Answer

That’s absolute horse-shit. It’s what it meant to be intellectually evolved ! Morality is what separates us from being savage , without which society as we know it would not exist. Our whole system of ethics and conduct is built upon morality. It’s what’s gives life balance “ doing what is right “ The immoral would never be happy.

All we are at the end of our lives is the sum total of our actions and experiences.

“Be your own master , and look at things as a man , as a human being , as a citizen , as a moral creature “ - Marcus Aurelius

“ I do not wish any reward but to know that I have done the right thing “ Mark Twain

Telekinetic-Potato · Answer

It's an interesting perspective. But think for a moment what the world would be like if nobody had any morals. The only reason you can be happy without yours is because everyone else has evolved to follow theirs.

Morals are why woman have any rights at all. They're why the Starbucks barista can't just murder you for being an ass every day. Morals are what stops people from using poison gas in war or makes someone stick their neck out for you at work.

Having no morals in a world with morals, it may seem that way but the risk is that nobody is obligated to act virtuous towards you once they learn your true nature. Which they eventually will. Are you going to still be happy when everyone you thought you could trust sees you as less than human?

Lynx122 · Answer

No I don't agree. I live by morals and principals and I'm very happy. The way I see it is if I did things that harmed others in big or small ways I'd have to carry that around with me. It would be a burden of guilt & shame. But I don't have that burden so I feel good.

Also I think most people that are fun and lack morals have something they're trying to escape from or some void they're trying to fill. They might seem happy on the outside in the moment but they're not. I know a person who's really struggling but always wants to party and break rules. She can be very friendly and nice and fun to be around when she's socialisining and drinking but as soon as she's alone she's suffering.

oing good feels good and when you're whole inside you don't need a thrill to distract yourself. It seems boring on the outside probably but it doesn't feel that way for me.

NathanDavis · Answer

well... a whole lot of people who like to throw their morals at everyone else... often seem to be very unhappy, lol

molonski2 · Answer

Id agree , most moral actions are complete and utter bullshit , like some of these Churchies , who say one thing , then do the complete opposite , so yeah its just something for sad sad people indeed.

BCRanger10 · Answer

I can tell you definitely  NO.  Why? Because quite simply, many people today see morality as relative. In addition, religious faith, which concerns man's relation to God and to timeless and eternal truths, is often reduced to having good morals and having good morals is reduced to "don't be Adolf Hitler". Then there's also the question of what you're defining as "happy". Keep in mind, pleasure and happiness aren't the same thing. Pleasure is temporary, shallow, and fleeting. Joy and happiness are consistent and are connected to choices we make. They factor in outlook, discipline, and a host of other things.  And ultimately, I really have to wonder how someone could and would come to that conclusion that immorality means happiness.

jshm2 · Answer

You are a bad friend then, and she should ditch you.

A morally wrong thing, once admitted, needs to be compensated for. Else the character and trustworthiness of the person and their supporters can be called into question.

This is why, in court, the prosecution will bring these sorts of things before the jury. They prove you are not a person whose word can be taken, nor character relied on.

That you were trying to roll back your supposed "friend" with negative platitudes, despite her admission, makes you one to hang from the rafters for being cancer on the soul.

Still-alive · Answer

Depending on what you mean by morals, i would argue if you have some kind of guidelines to abide by it can be more rewarding and thus make you happier in the long run. But you do you of course. So ill say i somewhat disagree on that

Tonytoutouni123 · Answer

I have a completely different opinion. From my point of view, behaviors that harm someone else are morally reprehensible.

There are a few exceptions: sometimes it's appropriate to harm someone, for example, if they deserve it, or it's justifiable, for example, when it comes to protecting one's own life or that of loved ones. If morality is defined in this way, I believe everyone should adhere to it.

However, some people have strange ideas about morality that, in my opinion, don't make sense, such as thinking it's immoral for a woman to have many sexual partners. I find that foolish.

Nikki1989 · Answer

It is always hilarious that those that preach morals are usually the most miserable people on the planet.

Anonymous · Answer

Sounds like your friend cares more about what she can get away with vs. what is right or wrong. Sounds like she’s likely gotten away with a lot. But she’s also got no leg to stand on when it gets done to her which she definitely has coming.

This is a breakdown in society. If everything is dog eat dog then civilization will eventually break down to anarchy. And leftist women who think that’s a good thing are too stupid to realize it’s society/law enforcement that protects their spoiled rotten ass’s from violent men.

Rab1901 · Answer

I went to one of the best research schools on the planet and the very first research university, and in my positive psychology class which I received an A on, I learned that the greatest social difference that predicted happiness was whether they were religious or not. Religious people tend to be happier, and religions tend to emphasize morals, so your claim would be incorrect according to psychological data.

JacobJordan · Answer

Immoral people are happier? Really? Have you seen the numbers of immoral people locked up in prisons? No? How about the drug addicts? Alcoholics? Chain smokers? Abusers? Rapists? Molesters? Are they happier? Those are immoral things. Hell strippers, whores, and sluts all do immoral things are they happier? Most of them are miserable most of what I listed is miserable

IslaTheWitch · Answer

I feel happy when I agree with my conscience... so I don't think I agree...

I think morals are for people who agree with them and want to live that way... it's a choice we make

I'm happy with my choice and my way of living. Don't feel like I miss anything

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

No. Morals are for a happy society. Selfish people are destructive to the very fabric of society. It’s morals that are meant to keep people from sh*tting on others out of selfishness. When everyone is sacrificing for the greater good, nobody is completely happy. However, everyone is generally happier than they would be if they had to otherwise constantly worry about what others would do to them without the mutual safeguard of moral fiber.

Gent207-2 · Answer

To abandon morals is to abandon laws and all social order. That makes rape, murder, theft, bigotry and all matter of such things socially acceptable and permitted without consequence.

Every human with limited exception has been endowed with the fundamental abilities to comprehend truth, justice and mercy. As a result of these three we have a working society and government.

Whereas morality in my view stands independent of humanity

RebelinSteel · Answer

No I view morals to be fairly fundamental to living life, having a relationship. Morals and ethics intertwine.
Loyalty

empathy

communication

respect

trust

consent

honesty

Compassion

being reasonable

Self control - morally wrong to hurt your partner

mobiusforniner · Answer

It’s not morality that makes one unhappy. It’s when people define their morality by rigid rules that makes one unhappy, because they’re unable to determine their self worth by anything else. These are people who live in absolutes, who fear the unknown. They see others happy and attribute their own “morality” as the reason for their sufferings.

if one needs absolute rules to dictate their decisions and worth, are they truly a “moral” person? Is obedience the same as morality?

marish01 · Answer

Well I will be happy if I get my dream looks, my dream career and my dream man.  None of my dreams are immoral

Grond21 · Answer

I don't agree at all. Not even a little bit. The happiest people are those who are the most moral. There are some who break their moral standards and feel some type of happiness for a short period of time, but it never lasts. Their own bad decisions always come back to haunt them

genericname85 · Answer

the thing about moral is that you can freely decide what's good and bad. you only need "some" concept of good and bad to have "a moral". not the one everyone has or agrees with.

RingOfFire · Answer

"My point is that immoral people seem to be happier than moral people."

I don't observe that at all, just the opposite.

Maybe it's matter of perspective. At your age maybe it seems true. But at a later point in life almost everyone I know who acted immorally in their earlier years has tremendous regrets and feelings of guilt and remorse. That definitely doesn't make the happier.

Anonymous · Answer

Can’t really base happiness off of if someone has morals or doesn’t have them. Unhappiness of a person is self inflicted, whereas morals are a social construct. But having/not having morals can contribute to your emotions, of course, but it’s such an insignificant part of it.

elaphe · Answer

There is a difference between pleasure in the moment (which is fleeting) and true happiness (which is satisfaction with life). Following a moral code usually leads to the latter, not the former. So, in the long term, moral people are usually happy and immoral people are usually unhappy.

Mr_twoface · Answer

I believe morals aren't specifically for unhappy people. Individuals in various emotional conditions depend on moral principles to guide their interactions and choices, affecting their sense of responsibility, integrity, and social cohesion.

Kingofkings1992 · Answer

I’m completely lost as to how you landed at this conclusion. Immortality makes you happier? LOL, sure. No person YOU associate with is truly immoral. Most truly immoral people are spending the rest of their lives locked in a cage like an animal. You’d be pretty hard pressed to find someone spending the rest of their life in prison who is happy.

FatNeville · Answer

Morals are for unhappy people, and morals are for happy people. Morals are for tall people, and morals are for short people. Morals are for the good, for the bad, and for the indifferent.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

No. Morals are for people with morals. I don't know a single immoral person who is also happy. You can tell all of those people hate themselves deep down.

avery58 · Answer

No. I think being a moral and thus positive person generally makes someone happier than having a guilty conscience over something

AviatorTom · Answer

No, morals are for everyone. Some people have problems with morals though.

lightbulb27 · Answer

Morals keep one out of trouble. Its her life. Suffering is the teacher for the immoral.

Siri137 · Answer

So  that's  why I'm so grumpy all the time!

Bagerl · Answer

No. People who care about morals can have more  reason  to be unhappy, but not always.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Well I think it depends upon what means by morals. Not violating the person or property of another? I just see that as a recipe for a decent society.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

No, morals are for everyone.  Are you unhappy? Don't you have morals?

DJB72 · Answer

I never met an immoral person who was genuinely happy, just hard hearted and selfish.

DaBiggestBird · Answer

Wrong, it’s the opposite. There is no such thing as an immoral happy person

dustybiker2 · Answer

Prison is filled with people lacking morals.

DreamLife7 · Answer

People who don't have morals are usually insecure and lack self respect

ChefPapiChulo · Answer

This is the stupidest shit I've read on this website all week. Congrats.

Sabretooth · Answer

great way to do young and get a shattered rep as well as lose people.

Pete671 · Answer

Having good morals makes you happy imho,,,

Fuentes · Answer

Do we live in the same world?

KrakenAttackin · Answer

Wow, your world is so easy and shiny.

MsBrie · Answer

No i have morals and I am happy as can be.

itsclearlynicholas · Answer

Im happy even if I'm moody lol 😂😆

elizamichale1 · Answer

I think u r right

DrPepper12 · Answer

No!! Happiness can go both ways!!

PapaJedi · Answer

Life's not fun with or without morals

loveslongnails · Answer

No, I don't agree with that statement.

VV3ZZY123 · Answer

They're lying to themselves

NetherlandsNar · Answer

No they are for everyone

handsomelad70 · Answer

Morals are for EVERYONE !!!

Theraingoddess · Answer

Animals live without morals..

GoGetitGio · Answer

No morals are for all people

Anonymous · Answer

I completely disagree with both of you

jahaims · Answer

The opposite

Are morals for unhappy people?

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