My bf hits. himself ! Help.:(?

[Anonymous]

Yesterday, I tried to break up with my bf. He started crying,. and hit himself in the head. extremely hard. Multiple times. I don't know why he does this... he said he loses his emotions. :( . He has. done this before in the past too. But yesterday made me so. sad. He kept. doing it, begging me. not. to. do this to us. I said fine. Was wondering if this was the right choice... and I remember during it. all. he kept telling me he was. afraid he was. gonna hurt. himself. if we broke. up.:(((( I know. he. needs. help, and that's why i stayed. But do. you. really think I should. stay or. no? :((((

[Sigma88]

Normally, men & women threaten the self-harm tactic to manipulate someone into or stay in a relationship. But if he's actually harming himself, & has done this before, take it very seriously. He needs help, so whatever you need to do, whomever you need to talk to, do it asap.

And don't stay with him. You want out for a reason. His mental state shouldn't discourage you from doing what you need to for yourself. Seek help for him first, to ensure he doesn't do anything to himself or others. Than begin moving on.

[Sigma88]

Then* - Damn phone.

[Asker]

Yes, I've thought about how he harms himself. And I just don't know who to go to. His mom, or, he's really close to. his aunt.. or someone professional. He has this really uptight family and I'm just afraid how they'll react. And when I take him back, and I still mention the help... he's like, I'm fine now :( so now it makes me wonder if he truly does need help

[Sigma88]

First thing, stop wondering. He needs it. Like yesterday. Secondly, tell them both. Also, contact your local prevention hotline, they know how to help.

He's using you as the focal point in his mental stability. Whatever his deal is, whatever happened to him, it's likely to get worse. Make the situation known, then walk away.

[Relationshiphelp123]

Is this guy from cyprus?

[evenlift]

This is a toxic relationship. You should break up with him. He is not a child, and you are not his parent. You are not responsible for his actions. But, you shouldn't be too worried anyway. Most people who do this kind of thing are trying to get attention. People who actually want to hurt themselves tend to keep it a secret. For example, I personally know of only one person who committed suicide. And he didn't show any signs. He didn't want to get caught.

[lePoivre]

I think the guy may need some therapy and you are not his therapist. If you don't want to be his girlfriend, you shouldn't feel obligated to be. I wouldn't completely abandon him if he's like that, but I would try to help him as a friend and recommend that he gets some clinical help as well.

[Your_boss]

He's trying to control you with the fact that he hurts himself when you try to leave. Also Men only cry when they are really deeply upset about something and most men do not cry for stupid reasons. So you must mean a lot to him.

[Reynier]

He needs help, not your help, professional help. This is self-destructive behavior in the most literal sense. I know this is tough, but getting sucked into the problems of even someone you care deeply about is never a good idea. Besides, Your_boss is right; he's trying to manipulate you by doing this. He knows that you care, so in his desparation he's giving you a (disturbing) ultimatum.

[ScruffyNerfHerder]

Don't let yourself be held hostage by crazy. You should leave. His extreme behavior is dangerous to you in a multitude of ways, physically, mentally, and emotionally. You have a reason why you were going to break up. Follow through and do not let yourself be manipulated.

[TonyRyan]

Holy overused periods, Batman!

Leave him before it escalates, if he loses control to the point he hits himself, how will he be when he's angry at YOU. Get out while you can.

[luvme56]

You should stay!! For a reason thay he cares about you and every one deserves a second chance!

[miserybusiness]

Uhh no, this is the wrong answer. Like Your_boss already said, he's trying to control you by appealing through pity.

OP if you don't want to stay with him, then don't. He really does sound like he needs clinical help.

[luvme56]

Ok... i wrong.. i guess @miserybusiness
I didn't see it that way!

[girllovesquestions]

I kinda agree with @luvme56 .. he must REally love u..

[Anonymous]

I will say one thing. Just feel the reverse of it and than decide. Put him in yours place and you in his. But in real meanings :) Good luck for you both.

[Asker]

I already have tried to feel what he feels. He must feel helpless. whenever I try to break up with him. He has no friends, other than me,. and.. I know it'll be harder for him. And at the same time, i be tried to make him see. how I feel so drained in every single aspect. He says I don't deserve him then but that he loves me too much too let go. I'm just stuck. Because. I feel like we both get each other.

[Opinion Owner]

Only one thing i would say. I had a same situation once. and telling you truth i was deeply desiring her. But she was so rude and she just broke up with open heart. even teased me with her friends etc etc. All in all, it made me so strong that I have far more better gf and people around me than that time. and if i just recall her attitude now, i simply call her cruel bitch. telling you very honestly.

And it was not that i was very weak, i just wanted her around me. it was utmost love. and i bet if the same case you are having, you can handle him with your affection and love but you must have to have it in your heart not something like sympathy. otherwise it will ruin you. otherwise treat him politely and choose or create some better options for him even if you want to leave him in long run. my simple answer :)

[Error_204]

You should put him down.

[Ihav2fart]

Dude needs some serious mental health.

[Ihav2fart]

Help*

[Anonymous]

hand him a baseball bat and walk away

[Anonymous]

Hi, is this guy from Cyprus?

[Findesemana]

he needs therapy..