I ment him online. He claims he's working and trying to get his house in order. He didn't text me today. He lives an hr away. He is 32 and I'm 22. He said that he thinks we made it official too fast and wants to go back to just dating if I was okay with that. We were official for like or 3 weeks. He is really missing me off and I'm losing interest in him because we never go out it's always texting. I'm a firm believer in shooting for one date a week. I get it that sometimes it doesn't work out that way and that's fine but 3 weeks is a bit much.
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I thingk radio is right
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it was all a hunt to try to get you to have sex
He's dead.
You have heard it here first folks. 3w year old Anonymous is dead. Found in his own home mangled by his pet chinchilla who has seeming taken over his household tasks including talking to his online girlfriend.
This cannot be healthy.
This is not healthy
So what do we do?
We put it in the subscripts of Cnn so that it is not a main news source and instead they feature 20 weight loss recipes for cupcakes.
That made my brain itch.
Exactly
It is the perfect recipe for CNN morning newa
news*
I can't wait until I am normal again. Then I will be happier.
This is what normal feels like. Like the average of everything. Like the average of the squareroot of the circle of life with it pie.
I can't speak English anymore
Then speak your native language.
It is my native language. I can only revert back to the tongues of a child.
And that would definitely weird me out.
It would be gibberish. And I would refer to you as Father
Sounds like a child molestation case revisited. So please, don't; I'm good on that portion of your life story.
It was a hot evening in the summer of 1925..
Lucky me.
Uncle Daddy touched me that night
Why is it always at night? I honestly don't understand that. I would think day, when everyone is at work, would be more convenient. It is for burglary and other activities.
I was about to do morning, but it wouldn't make sense since I said hot summer evening
That is very true. I guess you set yourself up for that one. Which is too bad honestly.
You want to to say A cool summer morning in 1925 Uncle Daddy touched me?
Well, no, particularly the 1925 portion. And the Uncle Daddy. Maybe that's a southern thing.
He's my Uncle and My Daddy from inbreeding. I guess. I Dont know
He's his own brother? Fuck. That is complicated.
My mind is being torn into pieces.
You need sleep.
How can you tell
I think it's because of the 1925.
Who's to say I didn't just watch Benjamin button and get the date from there?
Considering that would never have crossed my mind I will consider you a genius from here on out. You are better than I will ever be.
Well actually It is very kate and I did watch Benjamin button a hour ago. So we are bother correct
Oh dear, very kate, bother correct... I should tuck you in.
Please do. Just smother me with a pillow until I fall limp and am able to sleep forever
I think some ambien is the better option.
Whatever Im just gonna sleep.
Excellent!
Im here
Are you at least better rested after all is said and done?
No. That's impossible for me, my body is never rested
That's not good. I wish I could help you sleep. Maybe hold you in my lap or something.
Im sure that would help, but right now I'm just going to act like im high as balls and buy some cereal.
Hm. Fortunately for you I can't help you at all.
Nope. Not unless you have a coupon for cheerios at walmart
I actually do. Funny you mention that.
Shit bro. Now I wish you were here, people with cheerio coupons have the best taste in cereal
I don't know whether to be honored or mortified.
be honored. I have given you a title no one else has earned. Not even my family.
Fine, honored it is. Now that I feel special let me hand over the coupon.
I already checked out. It was just five dollars anyway for three boxes. Walmart fucking packs shit together and sells in bulk. Im going to eat this until I run out
Well, that works for me.
Do you know those lumberjack and elmer fud hats?
Yes. Yes I do. I own one.
We should join a club. The Elmer fud Club
"we" cannot. You may. I have to be a loner.
We can create one. Just you me, cheerios, hats, and honey crisp apples from Sam's.
Fine. Have it your way. We can have a club.
Its the Apple cheerios hat club of the century, sponsored by sams club
ACHCOC?
Yes. Achcoc. It sounds like your suppressing a sneeze.
Suppression is fun. Oppression is love.
I can confirm.
You oppress people?
All the time. I oppress the African americans, the Asian, the Middle easterners, All of them, women, children, men.
I see nothing of dog oppression. If I am a man can I be a dog? For men are dogs. And dogs are loyal. And loyalty is rare. So dogs are rare.
I shall never oppress the canine species. Although the gays have another thing to worry about.
Well don't oppress Jellyfish either. They just don't get it.
Jelly fish are stupid bastards, floating around without Organs, weirdos
I know! I'm jealous.
Only worries of being eaten by turtles
They've no brains. I highly doubt they worry.
I guess so. But I'd prefer to be a parasite. Just live and jump onto the next victim later
All is fun and games until someone gets done in with a flamethrower though. I'm more into plankton myself.
Solid choice.