Does "Relationship Status" really matter?

Question

He asked why my Relationship Status says "no comment". I said no reason, just don't want to comment. Then I asked him what his status was on his FB, but he didn't want to tell me.

It was never an issue until he brought it up. Now I'm wondering... how imp is status on social network sites?

GAG is the only network site I'm on, but even back then when I used to have a Myspace I put "It's complicated" on my status. I have never put "in a relationship", just because I didn't think it was really necessary.

But I want to know, is it really a big deal? Does it really mean something?

Updates

+1 y

So..

Is it more imp to Girls? Or Guys?

Just curious.

QuantumInc · Accepted Answer

Your profile is meant to provide a quick summary of who you are, which admittedly is not an easy task. However, if your relationship is important to you, then it would be part of that.

If you call it a "relationship" in face to face conversations, I think you should do the same online. Social Networking sites might not be "real life" but they are not fake either. They are just another form of communication. By saying one thing in real life and another online that is a very mixed message. Yes, the face to face/real life message is far more powerful and important, but it can still create a doubt.

Imagine if he introduced you to his close friends and family as his "girlfriend" but when you went to various parties and meetings that had a mixture of close friends, mere acquaintances, and total strangers he introduced you as his "friend" or even said "just a friend".

It doesn't matter what the GAG community thinks about you and your relationship status, but it would be bizarre to say something different within that community from what you tell the people who do matter.

He probably assumed your online persona was more important to you, and thus assumed you set it there for good reason, i.e. you don't consider your relationship a full "relationship" for some reason.

Regardless of what kind of relationship you and "he" DO have, it might be a good idea to go ahead and explain things. People can make weird assumptions about what constitutes a "relationship" and what exactly that means.

Ever notice that the word "relationship" can technically mean anything between two people, places or things, but when you say "They are in a relationship!" some very specific images featuring romance, love, and especially long term commitment come to mind.

IamThisGuy · Accepted Answer

I just recently had an epiphany about facebook and how it has so much information about us on the web so I recently went through all my friends and put them into lists and set each one's privacy levels. Only one list does not have anything hidden from them and there is like I think 10 people in that list that I hang out with on a virtually daily basis. My relationship status is hidden from everybody except that list because I find it to be the most unnecessary for the site as I use it to talk to friends (Im in a relationship by the way). If anyone were to ask me if I'm in a relationship I would tell them probably (depending on who they are, I wouldn't tell some random person for the same reasons my relationship status isn't set to "everyone") without hesitation or embarrassment. I also think people "feed" on relationship status more than anything else ( the real reason I hid it). When someone becomes "single" theyre all like "Oh what happened?" or when set at "its complicated" that's only begging for outside opinion IMO. Or when set to "in a relationship" people are like "WTF" or "OOOOOOOOOOOOO I have find out who they are to approve" and its like no you dont. So main point is my status is visible only to those that have my best interest at heart. You should do the same or not make it visible at all

blondediamond · Accepted Answer

Well I discussed this topic with my boyfriend around the time we officially became a couple, I wanted to post on my fb profile that I was in a relationship with him and asked if he could confirm it for me and he said that he doesn't like to post private things like that on the internet. I was fine by it and I could understand his point as it could led to some drama with crazy "stalkers" or exes, and because of his job as he is part owner of a company and sometimes uses his fb for business reasons with clients. So now I leave my relationship status as "in a relationship" while he leaves it blank which is fine by me, because I do not need "proof" on a social networking site to show people that we are together. If anyone wants to know they can ask either me or him. But all in all this practise seems to be most common with younger couples, but sometimes we may want to show your happiness on something public like fb as I did.

AmberDeS · Accepted Answer

Okay if your in a relationship to were the "RELATIONSHIP" itself doesn't have the title, I see it as no big deal what your status says, now if your in a relationships and you carry around the title "BOYFRIEND/GIRLFRIEND) I think its important to word it because if your really looking towards that one person you A. don't want other guys commenting unwanted things, because not only could this get super annoying it could also make your partner feel insecure B. Bc when most stuburn guys can't get the hint that you are taken it can cause a lot of UNWANTED conflicts such as stalkers,obsseions,kidnaps,etc you just never know with the world today! My advise is put what you feel and don't be ashamed or scared to tell your partner because if there is care in what you have he/she will understand how your feeling!

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Funny - I have had the same question!

To me FB status means nothing whatsoever. I am in a committed relationship with someone - and I leave my status empty. It isn't my style to broadcast my life all over the Internet. Those that know me know me well - and those that don't can go to h-e-l-l :)

That being said -- my Boyfriend actually asked me if I had "updated my FB page" a few months ago. However, he (like me) has the status portion empty. I told him the aforementioned rant -- and he laughed and said "it definitely isn't your style."

I think it means NOTHING!

If he is introducing you to family and friends -- one-on-one and in-person ... that means something ... anything less (including status updates on FB) is amateur hour ... and really elementary school

Kevin21 · Answer

Personally although my status is "in a relationship" I really don't think it's important. As long as you care about each other and you refer to each other as boyfriend and girlfriend or whatever then it shouldn't matter. I personally did it to stop friends from making a fuss. Letting them know on facebook lets them find out for themselves and lets their excitement die down before they see me in person.

My housemate however did seem to find it important and nagged at her boyfriend til he changed his, so clearly it is important to some people, but she's the kinda girl who's very aware of her own social status, one of those "gossip girls".

I'd leave your status alone if you don't want to change it, unless it bothers your man so much it starts to affect your real life relationship. Innevitably some relationships don't last, and then do you have to change your status back to being "single" and that's when you get a flood of attention when you least want it. If its still an issue with you and your guy, there's also the question "Is it such a big deal to change your status to make your guy a little happier?"

Anonymous · Answer

Facebook is the most obnoxious website ever, to me anyway.  I can't stand when I'm sitting with friends IN PERSON and they are having a discussion about Facebook crap.  In answer to your question, relationship status on social networking sites is about as important as you and your partner make it out to be. Have enough confidence in yourself that relationship status on a website doesn't matter to you, and people will respect that.  I don't have a personal facebook account, but if my girlfriend told me to get one and then told me to change my relationship status on it, just to proove to people we were a couple, I would think she's being ridiculous and then question myself for being with someone who thinks Facebook status is something important in life.

Xenophobia · Answer

Social Networking sites shouldn't matter. They are NOT important. If anything they make things more complicated than they really should be. If I were you, I wouldn't let people know your business because there are a lot of jealous people out there that could ruin a potential relationship for you.

darkknight1x · Answer

It's important to me. A woman not mentioning being in relationship with me seems that they are embarrassed to be seen with me and it makes me think that maybe she is just using me. Also it would be great to mention they are with me so my friends,family, and the people I went to school with can see what woman I'm with. I don't understand why a woman wouldn't put being in a relationship. Why hide something like that?! Not telling people how much money you have is understandable.

1saltyCracker · Answer

Both of you should delete your facebook and MySpace accounts and start worrying about important issues...like lindsey lohan...

sonic241928 · Answer

It's kind of weird for you to put "No Comment." It implies/connotes that there's a problem with the relationship and THAT'S why you have no comment - link .

Why don't you just put "In a relationship"? You don't have to say who you're in a relationship with.

Answer to your question: it depends on the person. Everyone will have a different opinion on this; you can't assume that the whole world thinks like you. That's why, when you start a relationship, you should have a little discussion about relationship statuses, etc.

Best of luck.

Yeahhbro · Answer

Believe it or not yes it is. Social Networks like Facebook have become close to in importance your criminal record. People are so concerned over what your Wall says that it is really scary. I think this is possibly because these social networks give a good glimpse of the kind of person that you are without asking you directly, and guess what it is much easier to creep your wall than asking you. Men that like you are generally really concerned with this status, so are women as well, it seems that if you are single you aren't as sociably acceptable, when I look at people getting in relationships, everybody just jumps to comment on the status and to say congratulations, like you just won the lottery. Also being a relationship kind of makes you more desirable (if you are a woman) and with more social skills (if you are a man) generally. Its stupid but it is true. Generally when people look at you they look at your relationship status, its like the most important thing in a status.

Anonymous · Answer

I think it matters to me. Not because I'm scared of unfaithfulness or anything I think so much as I want to show my boyfriend of the the world! It also helps keep away unwanted advances from guys and awkward "I'm already dating someone else.." conversations.

But most importantly, I don't look at declaring a relationship as labeling something, I look at it as a promise. And it's a promise I want the world to see. :)

Jinmetsu_Rasetsu · Answer

Well, people want to know everything about you...  See if they can trust you or not...  I believe it is to your discretion if you want them to know or not.  Me, I have a reason for divulging as much info about myself, I am not at liberty to explain why...  But I gave a lot about myself.  However, people want to knolw your status for reasons if they can, if you will, try to see if they can "get with you"...  I mean, from what I can see on your profile, you are "Totemo kawaii na onna no hito..."  and I am sure I am not the only one that htinks that.  I have no idea as to what your intent is on GAG, I am new here...  But often times, it is to fulfill the crush or whatever the case with some people.  Maybe some people get off with the idea of having a relationship with someone online.  Me, I don't mind finding someone I can easily reach.  Nevertheless, it is your decision to what youput on the internet...

eidahl · Answer

How'd you feel if you overheard him mentioning he was single to another girl? It's kinda like that.

He can only assume(fear) you're taking the relationship lightly and that you're open to 'someone better' who might come along.

...

.. It is hilarious though.

NMMan · Answer

Social networking has spawned a generation of some people who think their relationships aren't "official" unless they're mentioned on Facebook, it's mind-boggling and completely ridiculous. Those people should ask themselves how people developed their relationships pre-Facebook, which was only 6 years ago by the way.

Anonymous · Answer

Is it important to you? If not, then it's not important. If it is, then yes it's important.

For me, on my public profile, relationship status remains private. In fact, I didn't even fill it out. Who needs to know? In some friends circles, they think I "have a girlfriend." - This is where I either have "stalkers" who would annoy me if they knew I was single; or to avoid being the constant butt of jokes for being single.

My other friends are either fans or professional acquaintances... no one that I know from this group who needs to know whether or not I have a girlfriend, if we fought, (ooh, look! just made it complicated, everyone! We're fighting!) if we just broke up, (Went from "in a relationship" to "single!") or if things are spectacular.

If I'm getting engaged, sure. That's big news. If I'm married, I get it. Otherwise, it's no one's business but mine and hers.

Anonymous · Answer

Where I am we joke that it isn't official until its on facebook.  Its important to me though,  it hurts a bit for the love of my life to just say I'm a "friend" when he talks to people.  Its nice to have it known publically that we are together.

Forgetable · Answer

To me it's a really big deal, it's the difference between feeling as though you can trust them if they are hit on or w/e to turn the person down, it's loyalty, and for me it's closer to saying they are happy/proud to be in a relationship vrs being ashamed or trying to hide it, how would you feel if a guy didn't present you as his girlfriend to his family? That's how I personally feel about it.

Bradtwo · Answer

Things only matter when you want them to matter. Mine hasn't changed in like two years even though I've been in a relationship. And my honest response is, I can't be bothered to go in and figure it out. It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is that you and him are very happy together.

Mushuu · Answer

Facebook is a stupid site that causes all sorts of problems, allows people to get suspicious and stalk you and all sorts of other problems, but sadly we all seem to have and need to have an account there. I think it is important to have it as "in a relationship with bla bla bla" in a relationship as it shows a woman is proud to be going out with this man and wants people to know and this makes us feel good =)

m3TALchick · Answer

I think its kind of odd that people don't just put the truth. If your in a relationship why not just put that? I think that people don't wanna put that cause they think that it will hinder them from getting any attention or their not into their partner 100& serious. That's just my opinion. The internet messes up a lot of relationships.

Littletad · Answer

Sometimes a guy will find out whatever he can about you through social network sites. Why he won't just ask you himself is beyond me. It's a little funny how he's scrutinizing that while not just directly asking. But if he didn't want to tell you his, that sounds a little fishy. But really, it's not a big deal at all, what someone lists on their sites.

ziaz67 · Answer

if you wren in a serious relationship and you liked the guy alot, why do you feel the need to hide it on social networking sites. Usually when a girl (or a guy) does something like that it means that they don't want to everyone to know so they can keep their options opened if someone better comes along.

martyfellow · Answer

To the really wired, yes, they believe everything they read on these sites like Facebook. The rest of us don't pay that much attention to Relationship Status.   We know it can always change!

22-BK-22 · Answer

he will feel proud that you have presented this to him. You can't stick to what you are used to. If someone sees that it is on it's complicated everytime.. they will think that you are complicated. And he will feel like you Don't love him as much as you say you do. It's a matter of honesty. It is like a man taking off his wedding ring because he always went with out one before he was married. But now you are taken, so put it. :D And show him you want everybody to know that you have a man ;D

lspfeiffer · Answer

i always keep mine at single even when I am in a relationship because it just seems like people should ask you if they really need to know.  Also I have quite a few friends who have had to deal with a ridiculous amount of drama after changing from "in a relationship" to "single".

stercor · Answer

Only what the reader infers.  The less information there is, the broader the inferences.  Your choice. And, thanks for not being an ``Anonymous User!'' Ted

papasmurf · Answer

It does mean something, a lot more than it really should..but it is more important to just do it for your girl, than to argue about it

hottiewithanattitude · Answer

guys like to know that you really care that your with them...by posting in a relationship it lets him know that you are interested and aren't just using him till you find someone else. Even though guys say they are emotionally strong I think they are a little more touchy when it comes to theses things.

Newskin01 · Answer

I myself just find that I just question what is going on with them but I suppose if you know the person your prob know there dating someone.  I don't see that it's important nor necessary.  Just prepare for the questions I guess.

amenah · Answer

if your serious about each other yes it does matter

Anonymous · Answer

Depends on you, if you are private or not or if you care about how he feels about it. If if bothers you change it.  some people care some dont.

Anonymous · Answer

if people purposely don't acknowledge their relationship on social networking sites, it may be because they are looking for other girls/guys to hook up with.  just be careful...

Anonymous · Answer

no it doesn't matter its just a site he's overreacting

Does "Relationship Status" really matter?

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