Why do I feel so sad when my boyfriend leaves?

[Anonymous]

Or when I leave his place. I feel so empty and numb and just sad. I do not understand why. I'm pretty sure he does not experience this. We have been dating for 8 months.

Updates

+1 y

Thank you for all the answers! Relieving to hear it is normal - it’s my first relationship ever (I have very strict parents lol so I couldn’t really date until I was 17) so i didn’t know

[Adoriinu]

First, you might feel empty when you two aren't together because his presence brings you positive interactions, positive feelings, usually, I guess.
Let's just see it as if you were doing an activity you really like (gaming, or shopping, or eating, or walking in nature, or whatever) and you stop it. You feel like you hadn't enough and want to continue doing it, because it brings you some kind of happiness, no?
That's the same thing with someone you like. But with time, you learn to feel calm and okay when he's not around, I suppose.
Maybe it's because you are very involved in this relationship and you are committed. That can be pretty dangerous the day the relationship cease, because it can be very difficult to take in.
Your boyfriend must be a wonderful person if you are so attached to him, but don't forget that you are wonderful as well.
So try to rely on yourself sometimes to be the source of your happiness, that way if one day, a external source of happiness disappear, you will still have your beautiful self to make you smile.

Also, we aren't mentalists and don't know what other people think or feel if they don't share those things with us. So try not to think "I'm sure he...", "he may/may not", if you have no real proof, like bulletproof proof (kof kof). You dunno how he feels when he leaves you.
You may try to talk to him about this feeling of emptiness when he's not here, and maybe ask if it's the same for him.
If not, it doesn't mean he loves you less or something like that, it just means he loves you differently.
Every people has their own way of loving other people, and it's different each time and not set in stone.
So, anyway, you can share your feelings with him, it's always good to share thoughts and feelings to understand each other ^_^
Well that's my conception of the couple thing lol

[glitter_unicorns24]

I'm BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) & have intense separation anxiety that stems from abandonment issues. So mine is a bit of an extreme case of what you have. But what you're dealing with is completely normal.

[ciitruskiwi]

Because you like him and enjoy spending time with him and feel sad when you can't spend anymore time with him. It is completely normal. He probably feels that way too.

[Being_a_good_Indian]

Everyone knows it’s no fun to be away from your significant other. Long-term separation from a romantic partner can lead to increased anxiety and depression as well as problems such as sleep disturbances.

In monogamous animals, cohabiting and mating increase levels of oxytocin and vasopressin hormones that foster emotional attachments and activate brain areas associated with reward. As a result, when prairie voles are separated from their partners even for a short time, they experience with­drawal-like symptoms.

Grief associated with partner separation or loss and for disorders that involve social deficits, such as schizophrenia and autism.

In your case it might be #Perfectly #Normal.

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Any Queries?

Hope it Helps. 😊🇮🇳

[Being_a_good_Indian]

Thanks for selecting my opinion as Most Helpful Opinion.

[Sspaulding728]

Thats what love does yo. When your not with the person you have this emptiness. But as soon as you see them again everything is better. Enjoy it while you can. Im still searching for someone i can do this with. I'm 35 now.

[rm_llort]

Its because you have no life. Find some hobbies to focus on, imagine how you'd feel if he broke up with you. It is really unhealthy to be that oriented on another person.

[ThatshyDude]

I've been in that place. Don't be in that place. It's depressing when that happens. It truly is.

[Asker]

Hi, I have hobbies beside my relationship and hang out with friends, but I’m in a very busy period of my life where I don’t have much time so most of my time goes to him as he enjoys meeting up every day (and so do I) so maybe it is because a lot of my free time goes to him?

[rm_llort]

Just imagine if he walked out tomorrow, what would you do?

[Asker]

I would be sad ofcourse, but who wouldn’t be sad if their partner walked out on them. I mean, if you wouldn’t mind them walking away than why even bother being in a relationship?

[rm_llort]

My partner passed away. I'd be fucking ecstatic if she walked away...

[glitter_unicorns24]

People can have very full lives & still be sad when separated from the person they're in love with.

[rm_llort]

@glitter_unicorns24 your response doesn't add anything. We already know that. I'm offering advice having had a shit 4 months myself.

[glitter_unicorns24]

All I read is that you said it's because she has no life & that's completely incorrect. Bye.

[rm_llort]

@glitter_unicorns24 and we've established that not to be true. I'm glad you have a firm grasp of the obvious now. Bye!

[Anonymous]

Dogs have the same whenever the owner leaves. They bark as if he never comes back, Even though he comes back every Time.

[Asker]

Soo... you’re saying I’m his bitch? Lol sorry I had to

[Opinion Owner]

Hehe all good, I appretiate your humor. ^^

[SullyB]

You're emotionally attached to him. That's so sweet!
Why does he not feel the same?

[Asker]

I once said that I felt sad all of sdden and he said it’s probably because I’m leaving and that he doesn’t like that either but I think it is on a different level.

[SullyB]

Why do you feel that?

[DikchaBasnett]

You love him... A lot...

[Halucinator]

totally agreed!

[khany]

Tell him. Maybe you want it to be more than that.

[romperstomper]

Because you miss him

[sasha_fko]

I Guess ou love him