Walking on Eggshells with Girlfriend?

[DubstepRaver]

My girlfriend loves to find problems that don’t exist. For example she has an issue with me sitting on the bed vs the couch. There’s honestly so much stuff that she nags at me for and it’s so tough sometimes. I find that no matter what I do she’s going to find a way to turn it into an issue where I’m at fault. Probably 80% of our fights start from her and prob half of those are about things that are so insignificant that they shouldn’t matter.

This was a bit of a vent but I’m not sure what to do, because I still love her but she just gets super moody sometimes and turns into Karen.

[novert]

Okay, first thing first! Your insignificant matters and her insignificant matters well and never be on the same levels.. EVER!! My opinion, ask her to make a list of the things that you do that nags her. Then ask her why it nags her? Then try to come to a compromise!! Then put the list on the frag and let her know moving forward these are new habits that you need to train yourself on doing.. and like everything else you need time to make them all routine.. try that!! The fights will stop..

[DubstepRaver]

I would literally become a slave to her if I did this. And yes, different people value things differently but there is a level of reasonableness that should be made. If I have to change who I am due to a small thing then that’s just not reasonable. It feels like I have to compromise who I am sometimes.

[novert]

That's why I used the word COMPROMISE!! I also let me tell you something if no one as told you, relationship requires both people to change in so way.. what's not important to you but she finds it important? If you want the relationship to work it will become important to you. Same goes for her. From your example setting on the couch instead of the bed is a small issue.. that's not going to change your life or personal in any way.. some compromises is a little bit of sacrificing.. its call love brother..

[DubstepRaver]

Yea I have no issue with sitting in the couch. I told her straight up if she wants me to I will. But she gets mad at me for not doing it on my own. Like I don't know how I’m supposed to read her mind and know when I can and can’t sit on the couch. It’s a small thing but it blows up. Like just tell me if you want me to sit on the couch today lol.

[novert]

Lol... women are strange creature brother! Communicate with her in every way possible!! She gets upset? Say honey set let me rub your feet.. she's arguing? Out of nowhere say I never noticed how beautiful your lips are when you get upset!! I think I get you upset unconsciously just to see your lips.. tell her you understand and hear what she's saying... but I just have to let you know how much you are in love with her and thank her for everything she does and let her know you appreciate her..

[Barbaric]

How do you respond?

It sounds to me like you're too much of a nice guy, like you kind of put up a bit of an argument but you still give in to her ridiculous demands.

I mean you're seriously having a conversation about how SHE should have told YOU where to sit? You think that's a serious complaint? You think she should tell you where to sit? Why?

[DubstepRaver]

That’s the issue. A lot of the things she complains about shouldn’t matter. But she always brings up how things matter more to certain people which is true. But I mean cmon, there’s gotta be a line somewhere where it’s like “rly...”

[Barbaric]

So then she explains that and you say "okay" and give in?

[DubstepRaver]

Nah, I never apologize if I feel I’ve done nothing wrong. But she wants me to apologize if she’s upset even if I feel like the reasoning behind it does not deserve an apology. Usually just leads to more fights lol.

[AN1995]

My ex was like that and i broke up with her.

That relationship felt like i was in jail. And i felt free when i left... it was a good feeling
That alone should say a lot About that relationship

[DubstepRaver]

90% of the time she’s awesome though and I love her. It’s just in that 10% where she’ll bring something up from 2 months ago that never bothered her but she’ll use it to pin me as the “bad guy”. Very frustrating... like if you had an issue then why didn’t you bring it up 2 months ago rather than holding it over my head to use later?

[AN1995]

Thats like all women lmaooo Shel grow out of it

[Unit1]

She's a drama queen. Do you like drama queens?

I don't.