Any advice on finding a good healthy relationship?

[Anonymous]

Been searching and searching. Toxic person after toxic person. Women that would dumb me because they never loved me or women I'd dumb cause they crazy and are abusive.

[Anonymous]

So, you would like some advice on finding a good, healthy relationship... ok, I doubt that you will actually understand what I'm about to tell you... but, what the hell. The key to any good, healthy relationship begins with communication. Understand, that any relationship can be made to work... if and only if both of you put your all into maintaining it. You both must want it to work and all the hard work that you do put in to it... will produce the deepest love for each other, that cannot be experienced any other way.

[Asker]

Makes perfect sense. Every relationship I've been in has only been one sided

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah, you know, it's interesting to note just how well arranged marriages work... simply because both feel expected to be successfully married and thus both are willing and feel the need to make it work. Like Tina Turner so famously sang, "What's love got to do with it?" Not much at all in the beginning.

[Asker]

I'd hate that personally. I'm not the type of person to be easily forced into something that's not my choice, if I don't choose it. I'll be very very resistant in doing it if it's someone telling me to do it or forcing me into it

[Opinion Owner]

Good point, excellent point! Yet, If that was all you knew and never even thought about it being any other way... it sure would make things simple, would it not? Before things got terrible in Central America... I was promised to this other families daughter and at 7 years old, we actually had a marriage-promise celebration, with her in a wedding dress and I in a tuxedo and blesses as a future union. I really don't remember the "ceremony" but, I sure have many pictures to show and prove that it did occur. Granted, even at that age she was strikingly beautiful... Yet, I would have to ask my parents what her name was, and I would be surprised if even they remembered.

However, the point is that if I wanted it to work and as long as she was also willing to make it work... eventually, we would have developed the deepest love for each other. Overall, it really doesn't matter how you got together... only that it works.

Seriously, some people are attracted by looks, personality and girls are often accused of using their looks to gain a lifestyle that they are attracted to... guys, need a girl to let them know that they can also do the same. Yet, how many couples quickly separate after starting off so in love with each other. I have no real clue as to what would allow anyone to pick someone and know them to be their one and only. I just know that it does take both of you to be fully committed and work to maintain it.