Why do I always end up alone?

Question

Even after everything I've done. Made them my priority, cared for them , loved them , supported them , helped them , stood with them they always leave me when I needed them , they don't come looking for me unless they need something from me. They act like i don't exist when I done helping them. Why do i always end up alone , without anyone to love.

TruthBringer · Accepted Answer

I recognize my former self in what you've just told. I don't know you, but I can guess taht you prioritze others over yourself. And that was the single biggest mistake that I had made that made me in the past go through what you are going through now.

You make someone else #1 priority and you teach them you come second. And that's how they take advantage of you. They see you as a utility that they reach out for and discard whenever it suits them.

The key is taking a step back and invest in your own self-development and self-love. You need to take a step back from these people. It is time to build some self-respect and self-love. You MUST make yourself the priority in your life. Learn how to say no. The only reason why people use you is because you allow them to.

Trust and believe that eventually, you will have the right people gravitate towards you. Wholesome people that is that won't drain you.

CallmeTheKnight · Accepted Answer

When was the last time you put yourself first?

When was the last time you told someone No without wanting to change your mind?

When was the last time you stood your grounds when it came to boundaries?

If you don't know the answer to these, then you're the reason you end up alone. Self respect and boundaries will take you a long way.

spuitkaas · Answer

1. You are your own first priority always because if you don't, no one will.
2. Don't give much of your energy without ever getting things in return.
3. However, do help and give things when it doesn't cost you that much energy anyways and don't need anything in return. You make the world a better place and people will seek you out more.
4. That being said, give proper boundaries. It's good for you, but also makes you a more trustworthy person, because people know you will stand for yourself if they go too far.
5. Hangout with good people who are willing to give energy abd want to be your friend. Don't chase people who are not interested anyways.

Dontabesillybe · Answer

Could be that you desire friendship too much, there was once this African guy who message me on Instagram asking for a friend, I sort of messaged him now n again but couldn't be bothered in the end and we drifted away, so he never made a friend like thatThe way you meet friends is randomly or when you feel like it, you can't jus force it, two people have to click, jus enjoy life and wait for friends to come to you insteadThat's what I do, I never wanted friends, I jus sort of randomly make them when I wanna use people for fun aka hang out with someone

Anonymous · Answer

This is such a hard question. I don't know why life always works this way. For some reason ppp don’t value things when they have them or can have them too easily. Yet it isn’t always that simple. I remember in my mid 20s having so many girl friends and such a full social life I dated but really had no interest in a relationship. Almost even man I let in was obsessed. Now that I try to be a great ideal partner no one seems to appreciate it. So I don't know is the secret is not to care. But I totally get where ur coming from. If I don’t care then I really don’t want you. When I care I give 100%

Anonymous · Answer

It's hard to be a giver in a world full of takers.

If you become selfish, you SURELY won't have anyone.

Keep being you and you'll find someone that truly values the you, that you are.

If someome doesn't recognize, continue to be you, but be you WITHOUT them. Yes, it hurts to say "see ya", but no one deserves to be a doormat or taken advantage of.

Serenitykayyy · Answer

You have to be your top priority. You also can’t expect people to treat you like how you treat them. Not everyone is like you. People are just selfish. That’s reality. Treat them how they treat you. If you are the only one reaching out, stop reaching out. Eventually you’ll find the people who want you to stay in their life.

sage2021 · Answer

Maybe you should just ask the people you help what are their intentions are with you. Ask upfront so you can decide to help them or care for them or not. It is setting a boundary, which is a healthy thing to do in the beginning of any relationship. I hope everything works out for you.

Fanfare690 · Answer

You give give give just like me. Step back a little... and see what people do. Dont give other people too much or they'll take advantage. If you have real people in your corner they will say you're doing too much.. so if that happens step back. Remember dont give too much. Let others also give to you as well

slatyb · Answer

"Made them my priority, cared for them , loved them , supported them , helped them , stood with them they always leave me when I needed them"

It sounds like you "love-bomb" them inappropriately, then make unreasonable requests. Love-bombing may charm young women for a time, then they figure out how needy you are and end it.

"When I needed them?" What did you ask them to do?

anton_dee · Answer

Sorry to say but you are the idiot here. I was like that before, but I learned. And the valuable lesson I learnt is you put yourself before anyone else.

Help once. If they respond in kind, help again. If not tell them to sod off.

U r a good at heart guy, don't let them use you !!!

skyeee_ · Answer

don't make them your first priority. it's genuinely a bad idea and will only hurt you. there's no guarantee if that person has good intentions for u or not. some people just won't appreciate you, if anything theyll only remember of u when theyre in trouble.

not saying u shouldn't help your friends but dont be in a position where you're taken for granted

Better_off_here · Answer

i feel the same way, Women leave me and i feel hurt too much by anyone that i do meet.
i have been used and i feel unloved. woman i think to see you as toys and they do me and they have used me and lied to me i hate it, so you are not alone in how you feel too.

Anonymous · Answer

Nevermind. Loneliness is good sometimes.

"Darkness flees from the light, the lie flees directly.
The sun shines around it even if it is alone.
Do not worry, loneliness is the destiny of the righteous;
Crows fly in flocks, eagles fly alone."

Omar Khayyam

Mofunfour20 · Answer

That's the mf problem. You're too busy looking for someone to love, you neglect loving yourself. When you love yourself and your purpose, it attracts people that respect you. Start respecting yourself.

boggboss · Answer

Because making yourself a priority for shitty people won't make them stay

WhiteBoyChill · Answer

I’d say you’re definitely catering to the wrong people.

A lot of people in this world are just out to take advantage.

Only spend your time with those who value you. Reach out to them but also watch to see if they reach out to you

termanator · Answer

Buddy a book that might help you or rather a series of books that might help you is the rational male series by Rollo Tomassi

CalKing715 · Answer

Learn to love yourself! Once you learn to be happy alone and need nothing else to feel fulfilled, you will attract the love that's right.

Anonymous · Answer

You always end up alone beacuse you do everything you need for others. BUT after you give them everything they need. They dont return what you need

Waldoe · Answer

Self-examination is the only way to find the answer... we cannot tell you, Maybe seek paid counseling...

driven159 · Answer

in life there are takers and givers you have found takers look for givers and maybe both of you will be happy and it will the rest of them loss

legalboxers · Answer

pretty much

TheFlak38 · Answer

being alone is a man's destiny. Women live their life on tutorial mode.

Anonymous · Answer

You're too nice. Start being a dickhead and you'll see different results

Anonymous · Answer

Because you don't belong with average people.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Cuz dees hoes ain't loyal.

Babygirl_S · Answer

Maybe you're too nice.

barn_stormer · Answer

you're too nice and to the wrong people

Why do I always end up alone?

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